Clutter Law

Clutter was such a huge problem in nearly every city and house King Auz traveled to and scouted (such as the dwellings of the pig-apes in Alaska, California, Louisiana, Montana, Texas, Utah, Virginia, Washington, etc.)… that this law had to be written in order to begin correcting the evil mindset of the humanimals who kept causing such pig-pen-like messes.  It was no longer acceptable, legal, ethical, or sane to have or allow clutter… anywhere.  Clutter is one of the manifestations of Chaos, after all, and the time/Age of Chaos has passed, evident, among other ways, from laws against it, such as this.

Without these laws, and the means to enforce them, so many outings were grueling hells, vomitous and repulsive to the bitter end –and so many up ahead would be guaranteed to be just as bad.

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Definitions:

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While not (always) technically pollution or hazardous, clutter interferes with Feng Shui, thus it is unhealthy and forbidden.  It was such a widespread, disgusting, and catastrophic problem that laws had to be drafted and passed against it.  Clutter/hoarding is now a criminal offense, not just a matter to be exploited/exposed on popular television shows.

Range of Corrective Measures the Inisfreeans Can Enforce:

*The minimum, recommended, and maximum sentencing and fines (usually in the form of females or free labor, since we don’t use money) are decided by Inisfreeans on a case-by-case basis, considering all factors of the given situation, never defaulting to unilateral or draconian decisions voted on by judges or masses based on previous cases or rulings.

• Typically, the minimum fine for a first offense is a warning, and there is no sentencing,
• while the recommended fine and sentencing are, respectively, indefinitely surrendering the sexiest human female crew member or relative of the members of the offending party/group/company (so that she be used as a sex slave for so long as she is pleasing and attractive to us), then (the offenders, not the confiscated/surrendered girl) serving “hard time” in a concentration camp made just to guarantee round-the-clock free and fully-monitored menial/unskilled labor from humans (and we have no “white collar” prisons or other “lighter touch” facilities for the economically-spoiled/pampered).  Again, the logic and focus is:  more of better-controlling the confused/demonic human, rather than attempting to fine it back into submission or other reasonable behavior.  When fines are ordered, since we don’t use paper or metal money like humans do, only perfect females will do –just like how humans only accept perfect dollars/coins; no damage, missing pieces (such as faulty personalities, in the case of our ‘living currency’), etc..
• The maximum fine is always 100% of the female crew members AND relatives of the offending party; every female working with them AND known to them, which we are attracted to, and the maximum sentencing we put upon offending humans is, of course, death by torture (typically doing to them whatever they did to their victims, such as animals they exploit for “food”, clothing, or other animal products).  Humans never learned in countless trials/tests/opportunities, so there is no point jailing/incarcerating them, nor is there any benefit to ‘rehabilitating’ them or putting them through other re-education programs.  They have always been bullies, psychopaths, and monsters, and those creatures only understand and yield to greater force, thus the trial-less confiscations and torture employed to keep their lowly species in check now, once and for all.  In some cases, though, lifetimes of torture, and the crippling and ‘glassing’ of entire worlds, is in order –and does occur.

In cases specifically/solely regarding clutter/hoarding, the offender can have his/her right to own property/possessions of any kind permanently removed –even to the point of denying them clothing, and even to the point of denying them storage units, garages, closets, or a house of their own.

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Laws:

1. No residences or vehicles may have messes/clutter in them; all must be in show-home order and inspection-ready at all times.
2. No human may make an excuse for why his/her area/home is cluttered; no new activities may be started, and no ongoing activities may continue/resume, until all clutter is cleaned up.
3. Inisfreeans (i.e. King Auz, as they are all extensions of him / his will) are the only ones who get to decide what clutter is; its definition, and whether they see clutter around them.  In other words, humans are not permitted to say/claim, “Well, this is not clutter to me.”
4. Hoarding/hoarders are illegal, as they are one of the most extreme forms of clutter/clutter-ers.
5. When there is clutter in an area no one claims ownership of, Inisfreeans can delete all the clutter out of existence; it’s either that, or assigning a human/team to clean it up, and when one isn’t volunteering/volunteered, it is always beneath an Inisfreean to handle such a disgusting disarray.
6. Clutter includes congestion on highways and streets, and unkempt/unsavory people/pedestrians both inside and outside; it is illegal to have mobs/masses anywhere, even if they are just walking to work or through a city park.
7. Online clutter is also hereby and forever banned; no advertisements, such as banners or hovering/moving/following animations/videos are permitted on any website for any reason.  If revenue was once generated through them, new (respectable) revenue sources/streams must be established.
8. Online clutter also includes unattractive thumbnail images and videos; porn of ugly people is clutter, especially when any website is full of it, knowingly or otherwise.  All unattractive porn shall be permanently deleted off the Internet (meaning:  off  every computer that is connected, or can connect, to the Internet).
9. Cluttered minds are arguably the most challenging of matters in this field of law.  Thankfully the Inisfreeans have the technology to gracefully detect, locate, and clear up such psychosis-causing/continuing issues.
10. Urban sprawl is also considered clutter; all cities, human and otherwise, must be spaced far apart, never allowed to grow together, and their interiors never allowed to become chaotic/unkept/confusing.
11. The Inisfreeans even have a “super weapon” (more accurately a “super healing device”) that can end clutter on the cosmic scale; their “Life Star” main beam can stop an entire world from cracking into fragments, and/or reform an asteroid belt into whatever type of planet or moon it may have once been.
12. Coordinated fleets of Inisfreean starships can even realign solar-systems and galaxies, putting Creation itself back into its intended arrangement/formation/orientation, rapidly blasting away all impurities/infiltrators off every world within that impressive Interstellar-Medium-spanning range.
13. There is also a clever way the Inisfreeans have developed to declutter the timestream/s itself/themselves, even fixing all the sloppy nonsense/issues caused by the primitive time-travelers of the SSPs.

As these laws become more specific and lengthy, they will each be given a paragraph/section of their own on this web-page; they will no longer be listed as numbered bullet-notes here.

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