I’m waiting to see if I am meant to learn of and visit ruins or other ancient sites out here –and I’ll be much more precise about what I manifest before braving another Winter drive.
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Table of Contents:
- Phase 1
- Phase 2
- Phase 3
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Phase 1:
The usual fear-mongering peasant retards warned me against going here, just like their kind warned against everywhere and everything else; they claimed dogs regularly got frozen standing on the side of the road, and that there were freezing winds like nothing even Montana (with its normal -30°F winters) ever saw, along with snowdrifts covering entire homes. Just like always (go, me!) I ignored all that crap, did my ‘homework’, and went anyway. Nearly getting run off the road by crazed truckers not paying attention to the road or my hazard lights, I was only surprised at how bad the drivers were, though I suppose that trucker could have been from anywhere, and 99% of the others weren’t much of an issue. The real issue with this state (one of the only accurate reports I received about it) is that the major highway here is arguably the longest, straightest, most boring one in the entire United States; ‘highway hypnosis’ is a huge danger here, and there are rarely any shoulders, guardrails, or anything else to stop you from sailing off and over the steeply-swooping side-hills and berms –right down into the immediately-adjacent farmland and drainage ditches. (And that might be why that one trucker nearly killed me and himself, though he is still certainly to blame for rudely and insanely nearly blinding me with his high-beams when I was already all the way over and driving safely in blizzard white-out conditions. Fuck that guy. Hopefully he crashed and died right after leaving my field of view. Dick.)
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Phase 2:
I’ve learned that this is another of the ‘farm belt’ states worth visiting to learn more agricultural tricks from; North Dakota ranks first in the production of flaxseed, canola, durum wheat, all dry edible beans, all dry edible peas, spring wheat, honey, lentils, sunflowers, barley, and oats. It is no small miracle that they can grow anything at all here, what with how windy it always is, and how nightmarishly cold it does often get during nearly all of its winters. Parts of Alaska aren’t even this frozen. In other words: if they can grow all those things here, and grow them so well that they are the best out of all the other 49 states at it, I can definitely extract a lot of brilliance which will be invaluable in the farming of Inisfree.
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Phase 3:
Leslie Bibb is a decent-looking blonde model from this state. (She was the one playing the leggy reporter who fucked Tony Stark in Iron Man, wisely choosing some ‘happy fun time’ with him instead of sticking to her regurgitated philosophical convictions.) Other than her, I’m not sure what else this state has to offer in terms of quality females. Got any leads? Now’s the time. Let’s let 3rd phase begin.
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gallery (until my photos of expeditions to this land are uploaded here, see these)
video