One of the most horrifying experiences of my life happened by surprise here; suddenly/randomly driving out onto a lake during the Winter!
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Table of Contents:
- Introduction
- Phase 1
- Phase 2
- Phase 3
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Introduction:
Home to endless flavors of cheese, it turns out I am gastronomically predisposed to like this place; my genetics allow me to digest dairy products perfectly (confirmed by electro-dermal screening along with endless personal tests), and I certainly love touring and sampling from the factories where such delicious creations originate. If you can’t yet get them direct, at least get as close as you can to this realm, or, at the very least, order some from afar. These people know what they are doing; they are the masters of the cheese craft, and I would guess only the dairy farmers of the Swiss Alps know any better.
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Phase 1:
Visiting a war-brother in this state, I tried snow-caves, driving on frozen lakes, ice-fishing, and a new expansion to the World of Warcraft MMORPG. It was a great experience, though I was admittedly more than petrified with dread when he stopped on the middle of the frozen lake we’d driven his pickup right out across… to hook up to a truck that had gotten stuck there; rocking our own vehicle back and forth, he managed to get it out, all the while I wondered how quickly I would feel burning, drowning, freezing, and numbness if we ended up cracking the white sheet beneath us and plunging in. I don’t plan to ever do that again, but I’m glad I checked it off my list. Wild stuff, and Wisconsinites do it like it’s just strolling down to the store to pick up a carton of milk.
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Phase 2:
Since I ended up regrouping fairly close to this state, I figured I should start learning about its (non-alcoholic) vegan options now. This research has only just begun. If you have recommendations –especially if you are a smokin’ hottie interested in being one of my new slam-pieces, let me know.
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Phase 3:
When I return to Wisconsin, I plan to be handfed the finest (now vegan) cheeses of all, as well as ‘breastfed’ (just the suckling; no need for lactation) by this state’s most beautiful girls –all at the same time. I haven’t found any information on decent models or actresses from this land, but there are always hot sluts roaming around from bar to bar and concert to concert. If they don’t find me through this site and the urban myths, I’m sure I can just start my surgical searches for them there.
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gallery (until my photos of expeditions to this land are uploaded here, see these)
video