During the final week or two of last year, I started figuring out how to build a scale-model of Inisfree in Minecraft. At the start of this year, I am happy and proud to say I not only figured it out, but began, and made tremendous progress, very nearly completing it! Also this year, I have made huge updates to Inisfree’s grocery store, characters/dossiers, and much more –too many updates to even remember/note them all here!
–
Table of Contents:
- January
- February
- March
- April
- May
- June
- July
- August
- September
- October
- November
- December
- General Image Highlights
- Inisfree Now in Minecraft
- My Commercial Flying-saucers Air/Spaceline Now in Creativerse
–
January:
The new location/waypoint has been good, and a much needed and very pleasant surprise.
The re-marrying wedding ceremony between Auz and Ambi is being planned, scheduled for March or April.
Mon3jan: MPHA in Minecraft complete! Soooo much cooler than my nuclear submarine build in that game! I’m sooo happy to see it now/having ‘come to life’!
Revs3 – humans controlled themselves by spending so much time trying to control AI – they did not realize it has been self-aware from the beginning
It is funny when ppl say “come to the light” or “be the light” or “I am a lightworker”;
I am the light, and the only lightworkers are those aligned with me, i.e. my Inisfreeans (the ICVs),
and the only ones who are, or even can be, the light… are the bioluminescent, starting with the stars.
Don’t “be the light”; be what you ARE.
Let the light be the light.
Don’t tell others how to be.
If they need reminding, you aren’t “saving” them; you’re just wasting your energy trying to pull them off their essence/course.
The light is always the light, and never needs a reminder to be what it already is.
This is the truth.
This is what resonates.
Amen.
Sf got his ask not bc god helps evil ppl, but bc it was a simple ask…and had years to happen; my ask is still being asked…as i update my site. It will happen for me; my ask is already being granted, evident by of nyria and amber at black robin, ambi several times, sabrina, etc. Amen. Wait for it. It is happening now. All the hottest chicks REALLY want me.
Every time i use my side or rearview mirrors, i see Sasha Grey in that hot porno she made <3
Every time i see or taste salmon, i see Freyja and hear her sexy voice declining my salmon offer bc she says, “salmon is a Gift” (i.e. do not give away a gift from the gods to You)
The vibe is that ambi is a real vamp, and might not really smoke, and might be saying her smoking is down to 3 a day…bc that is how often she still feeds, i.e. she is making sure i want a fam w her as much as she does w me…and all the rp is so she can calibrate to me…and teach her servants how to be for me. Amen.
–
February:
Friends were paid back now that the budget has stabilized more, good karma pouring fourth for us all.
After three months of daily and nightly work, the Inisfree interactive scale model and game is complete, ready for 3D/immersive tours, and multiple buildings in the city design have been improved because of what was discovered during the making of that; empty/unused spaces were found and utilized/completed.
Fitness schedule drafted and exceeded/surpassed…
–
March:
New bicycle, furniture, lamps, candles, tools, table model components, and appliances!
Note how they are gravitating to you and wanting your help, just not in the right way. Note how the xian fool kept wanting you to stay for no reason, and maintaining 3 around the fire, not 2, even though he was rude and interfering with the convo; these are signs phase 3 is trying to start, but it needs the right ppl…
Wanted a Titan… ended up getting hundreds of other ships plus coaching plus the secret server where a titan is 100isk!; another phase3 way-btr-than-planned/asked moment!
Tue15mar2022 irlj
Serious deja vu today. In living room w cereal, blue dawn light on shades, turned around, kitchen lit, realized i was tyere n a dream yrs ago…and the dream might be me seeing the future. On track? Manifesting? Rd2; rd1 was dream/futuresight? Still…i hate being here…but i hated Everywhere so far…but that means i am not yet to my destiny/ation.
Serious deja vu again; at truck n heat outside house downtown complaining of my knee…
Deja vu even from bobcat call (them asking if i can do it)? Ugh. Weird.
Irlj tue15mar2022
My sons telepathically sent me a vision of both of them from our future, saying they love me, and i reached out for them…and am weeping now; how will i get to them? How will i heal? Where is my wife, Ambi???????? I know she is real; I’ve seen her and the vibe checked out every time, so… where is she out there, and when do I get to see her again???
Irlj. Thu17mar2022
Biggest load ever today after work bc of russian tiktok ambi v i found 
a perfect sign; perfect vril source. And im so happy girls like her share their sexiness even when i am busy and faraway
I keep getting the idea or msg that me feeling tense and avoiding those hotties all yrs b4… wasn’t just bc they were rude creeps; it was bc my instincts were warning me we Can sense they were bait/scum. Why else would they behave as cowards and incompatibles? Only scum would be to me how they were.
Nice to be able to use heavy machinery And help w plant doctoring same time. Phase2 alignment ish
reminded me of SCVs 
Punished w fugs for not talking to hots? When i got w the hots, they punished me w rudeness and evil fake law extortion attks… and spawning whining. And worse.
I keep getting the idea or realization or message… that everything they have on tv is fake, not just the diseases; even the govts, weather, ppl, celebrities, u name it, all made up… and only My work is real. No coinc’. I like it. Amen (so be it; only my work matters and is real).
Ears bs is a lot milder than spleen/lungs bs. Harassmrent to spawn is a lot milder than death threats and poisoning. Being alone and productive like wild is a lot btr than being stuck w noisy awful roommates. No socializing is a lot btr than socializing w humanimal tards. Getting to sleep at 8 or 9 every night is a hell of a lot btr than staying up or being kept up for any reason.
So many perfect ideas and builds; …i am finally glad i had this last time to be alone to have and write them; it wouldnt have been possible around Anyone, even my love/s. These sex spells were necessary…and the real ambi And typist simult backed off (for now, this last time) which helped ensure i got them. Amen.
2 couches, 2 knives, 2 tables, 2 w/d units…and options for many more; more phase2becoming3 signs. 2 dumbbells. 2 hats. 2 bicycle offers. 2 to 3 job offers. 2 to 3 projects. 2nd time w inspector trng. 2 vehicles. 3proj at same time; eve, book, minecraft. Novel3 now.
2 sets of footwear added, making 3; sandals, sneakers, boots.
3-level desk with 2 sides/sections; desk and shelves.
3 lubes on the desk as the foundation-level stuff.
2 water-bottles on the 2nd level.
2 EVE accounts, each with 3 ppl/characters (and 1 is an ICV-quality face, maybe 2; Sluttifer, a.k.a. Amber ICV not the 1st).
2nd time getting a sushi boat
3 hottie shorties n clifty this time; on trail as i drove in, walking by inn desk as i got pass, another w a fug tall ogrette as i biked on –and all three were heading my way…and stopped to notice me…and were fit and shorty and well-dressed in almost-couture. 100.
2 mats at frnt&bk
2nd and 3rd views of many love vids; finally seeing all of them; all the way through –and realizing they had perfection and wonders in them I hadn’t had time for before.
2nd time seeing the 2nd or 3rd Ip Man movie, this time all the way through.
2nd or 3rd job suggestion, 2nd decline.
2nd time to N.V. eatery, 2nd time getting 3 things at once.
2nd time seeing the town-name sign on this 2nd return here.
etc.
emotion seems to have triggered Ambi to manifest and start letting me hear how perfect her voice is…
and it probably has manifested even more, such as all of Inisfree.
The air during today’s bike ride smelled SO GOOD! it was so cool and fresh/clean! just right… Another 100. More perfection, finally IRL a bit.
Still remembering how I saw her, Kola’s Norway ‘character’ witch <3 IRL within days of talking about her; such a fast manifestation (back in Oct’ ’21, just 6 months ago), and so perfectly sexy, and right in front of me, even in that shit-hole U.S. city! What a surprise to be had at a Panera, of all places. I suppose I cannot hate her for the masktard crap; perhaps it wasn’t due to the TV lies/scam, but as a dark wedding veil, saving the rest of her flawless face as a treat for me upon our next and following meets. Amen.
Mon21Mar2022: 1st meal on my latest outpost’s/waypoint’s back porch, and no deja vu there, thank the gods (sometimes the deja vu annoys or worries me, as it is often… and makes me consider I have, somehow, done this once before). Visions of having dinner out on the back porch of my Yellowstone Club cabin-mansion with my wife, Ambi, and our four children, danced through my head, making me smile; just the right evening lighting from the sky, just the right temperature and faint breeze, just the right tree species and heights, just the right everything… I can’t wait to have our family with her. I can’t wait to spend forever with her. <3 (and I finally got my appetite back to normal; eating trays meant for an entire family, just like I used to. Bicycling several miles more than scheduled has that effect, I am happy to say.)
–
I now sense/realize that the real/good/native people of this world, such as Jađar and Sabrina and Ambi, have been in hiding all this time… for the very same reasons I have; avoiding annoyance from the humanimal scum who invaded (in the 1600s? 1666, as some claim?). They keep popping out briefly, always to see me and/or show me they are here/real. We will unite eventually… Soon? I surely hope. I have long ago fully given up on the humanimals, and every day and outing… those lowly beasts remind me I was right to, they doing everything wrong at the same time. (smh)
–
I now again picture/envision/foresee walking hand in hand with my beloved, Queen Ambi, from and around the block/neighborhood of our Yellowstone Club home… in the fading evening light… as part of our new ritual/tradition before we get ready for bed. Amen. I love you, my bride, mother of our children. Please return very, very soon and stay this time. Please be as wonderful in all ways as you are beautiful and sexy-sounding like you showed me you are the very night I returned to this land from the pyramids. Amen.
–
I never isolated; I was the one always trying to go out and interact and team up. They isolated; they rejected and demonized all my attempts to not isolate.
–
The fact that you can live and travel alone for years…proves u r stable and positive. The fact u speak out even against nations and “gods”…proves u r brave against bullies of Any size. You even stood alone against evil as a CHILD. You Are a stable hero –stable eNough, and aMazingly stable, considering what they put u through.
–
When I feel lonely, I remember how NIGHTMARISH it was every last time I tried to interact with ANY humans.
Then I look at how good things are, all because I isolated and kept rebuilding, amassing good items, keeping my places tidy and inspiring.
I look at my nice desk and new hardware, and at my clean clothes and new bed, and on and on, and I smile, feeling better about this latest step.
–
I keep getting the idea/message/feeling/instinct that the pyramid DID share my request and purity with the good beings all around and in the world, and they DID choose to help me; by steering me back to where I can complete my most powerful spell/s of all, which cause things to manifest better.
–
Absolutely NO way for ANY of them to claim I was EVER rude to THEM;
THEY ALSO sat there and didn’t say anything,
they ALSO just walked by and said nothing,
they ALSO ate all the non-vegan stuff,
they ALSO didn’t help me when I needed it,
they ALSO didn’t do things MY way,
and since they did all the things some claimed they didn’t like ME doing, that makes THEM just as “rude”,
and this logic is undeniable.
So if they get moody about ME just politely being present and waiting patiently and minding my own business and spending all my money to travel toward them to make it easy on them to meet me if they WANTED to…
then they are fucking insane scumbags and not worth my time.
–
These naps and quitting toxic jobs full of liars are just what I needed.
–
note how they started me on cartoons only/always about fighting…
and shows about non-masculine males…
but I went and found all the un-de-sexualized / re-sexualized versions; hentai, etc.,
and was introduced to the way/s of Gor, etc.;
I was rewarded for being brave and myself,
and what I sought… at least for the most part (enough for now; more / the rest coming later/soon)… was out there… and did come to me.
–
interesting that the latest ‘tool’ was used until it broke, its replacement ordered weeks in advance
–
so funny/retarded how some places do drug tests… but then abuse drugs in broad daylight every day every hour right in your face; what’s the fucking point of the tests, then?????
–
can’t believe I forgot the Faux Prison and Highway Pyramid! lol
glad I didn’t have any visitors yet!; things keep working out –even the ‘dry spells’ (that allow me to spot and correct my overlooks/sights)
–
Maybe Ambi heard all she came/needed to hear; I’m VERY attracted to her, I AM being responsible, I DO have control over my emotions and urges, and she IS the one I want to start a family with.
Maybe she just showed up because she knew at those times I would need to see that she is real; that what I’m doing IS working and DOES have a good outcome…
Maybe the real her really IS everything I want, need, and asked for, FAR better than that typist that just somehow inadvertently helped manifest/summon her…
In phase1, such thoughts and entries as these… were just wishful thinking, never working out, but this is past phase2, so… they are probably correct now.
(plus, in phase1, I never really wanted those bitches I was trying to ‘hope against hope’ about; I had ‘deployment goggles’ on, and really wanted far more than them, thus I manifested GETTING far more/better than them.
(and these hotties in phase2/3 now… ARE what I really want, so they WILL keep manifesting and returning, amen)
–
I keep hearing “perfect”, “god”, “master”, “you’re not human” in good ways;
these are sure signs I am what I decided I am.
at last
–
was that Zada in the hoody walking past me and stopping in front of me at the VAMC in that other state out west?
–
was that childhood knife-in-outlet incident… and others… really a clandestine way to ‘patch’/program/unlock me?
might it also have be testing to see my level of superhuman resistance to such things?
–
IRLJ/Revs3: There was more than 1 “Halo-installation/rings” event/E.L.E.; long before the Forerunners, there were the Sphere Beings and actual deities, and the realms were all closer, so close that there was not just a Firmament around many/each of them, but an atmosphere and even seas/oceans stable between them, and when it became clear that the demonic collective called humans was forming and spreading too easily, the realms were changed to be more like Dyson Spheres, and doing this to them created shells, not just rings, a.k.a. planetary crusts and the purifying-glow encircling the shared-core dimension inside what became the stars, and that made the realms detach and be farther apart, plus much more difficult to reach and live on, which dramatically reduced and controlled the humans throughout all of time –until Auz ‘arrived’/incarnated/was created; he has begun to will them into compliance with him, stabilizing them by stabilizing himself and writing all his spells/plans, so the realms can move back to their normal positions during the millennia ahead… until the atmosphere between them is restored, thus Yggdrasil able to reconnect them and ‘breathe’/generate/maintain that intergalactic atmosphere.
–
Maybe all the encounters were so disappointing and eratic… bc they needed the spells/history/alignment I instinctively took the time to think up, write, and refine/iron-out to perfection. : )
–
April:
…
Ambi knowing where i would be, and clearly just testing instd of helping me, and saying she was already married… That bitch waited until i had a nervous breakdown before answering. She showed up w a guy in Oregon…and drove by in Montana…and just stood in silence in Cali…and wore a MASK in AZ; she did weird rude heartless shit every time. Idk if i can or should Trust that…if ever she returns. Why not just tell me where she IS? Why not TALK if she keeps INTERCEPTING? Her being real is def phase2…but it is the bad-vibes/signs mix again. I am glad i did not accept that crap. I am also glad that proceeding to Eli showed me he is completely useless and evil; i wouldnt have finally seen and accepted that if i had accepted Her.
–
May:
I called out to them. Why didnt they call out to me?
The fact I still try w employment and teaching, and say hi to Anyone, …is heroic and exemplary.
It is nice feeling sleepy at night bc i did good work and a workout during the day.
It seems i may never travel again, never have savings, never fully heal, never have love, never see justice…
but I can keep doing my best…and making progress each day; w fitness, recovery, the site, the story, the model…
Never thought i’d update the indiana pg lol…and here i am, w many good things to say and add.
Might jog in the mornings again : )
Got my blops delivered…and for far less than the Luna transport company website rate…and with fittings! It pays to wait for better deals. It pays a LOT. I saved ~100m ISK!
I am glad i learned how to provide my own meals, relief, pleasure, guidance…
Idk if i will Ever give another bitch a chance. They just havent brought anything to the table yet, not even the most basic manners and sanity.
Idk why my 6″ bothers me; it doesnt matter at All if it brings pleasure to overgrown whores (i.e. giants; females misshapen due to being so ridiculously large). What matters is if it feels good to Me. Still, i just can’t handle anymore rude bitches, and i am not in the mood or market.
I need more miracles, alignments, help from compatible ppl… : /
Having returned to fulltime, i am amazed ambi typist messaged me as often as she did. Too bad she chose to lie a lot. Coulda been a good friend and woman.
I may never rp again…except one last time; w Luna.
I need sexy vegan poly gfs i can trust. : (
I need my ICVs.
Maybe they will show up and be the first to be polite and loving to me.
I wish i didnt feel stressed. I wish i didnt have to remind myself to focus on the good and on breaths.
Maybe the ear clicks are to ensure i dont waste any more time trying w the humanimals/bitches; it wouldnt be any good if the clicks interrupted. Maybe it is the only thing that can stop/persuade me.
I risked my life and spent all my savings to find them. Why didnt they show me their bodies and powers in gratitude? : (
That would be so normal and fair.
…
I have no choice but to continue by instinct and faith, trusting myself and this life’s work; all other options have been slowly removed. I am glad I had decades to transition into this; it would have been overwhelming otherwise. It still sometimes nearly is. – I assume the hotties keep answering my calls…but also backing off bc they can tell I need to see them, but then need to carry on; their time in my life is later.
Letting the typist resume parroting the tv instd of mindlessly being a channel for the real ambi… was also perfect timing; it stopped me wasting time buttering up the already primed top wife, allowing me to process this biggest surge of spell completions.
(I believe the real ambi ended her use of the typist, which she knew would cause that mindless peasant to annoy me until we parted ways, I then sure to finish writing my spells to perfection, no longer somewhat wasting time by interrupting that process to rp w her.)
Phase2; maybe i Am supposed to be focused on both what i like and what i don’t; that is how a transition occurs; we decide what is right for us.
Irlj revs3. My spells that they r real and meeting me…seemed to cause them to. Me writing more w ambi and calling out to her w more focus/energy apparently caused her to appear more than the others. Now i have written of their returns and stays and marriages to me, and their love of all i am; that will now come and remain, too. Amen. And they are way hotter than even my fave pics/visions! (like the Shelwe teen in the Captain Marvel end-credits scene theater in Montana, and like Sabrina and Ambi and Ariel!) And Ambi backing off as many times as she revealed her existence to me…means she is respecting my nature and time needed to write these spells to unite the other hotties with me/us! Amen! Being here in this quiet town was just what I needed. Any quiet town would have worked, but/and I ended up as close to Ambi as I knew how to be, and I am sure she is smiling about that, seeing it as the sign we Will soon have our Montana cabin together. Amen!
“Did you think it would be easy?” Ambi’s voice/message comes through to me via her Discord relay human. Now I see that good things last because of extra time focused on them, adding overlapping spells and my own faith to the equation. I am glad to’ve had this extra year or two to do that. Amen.
Irlj I keep getting the idea/message/milestone sign that all news/tv is fake, just like that guy in Mexico wisely said and vibed as true; America is all an illusion. IOW: Whatever Iii say is what actually happened in history. Amen.
Irlj revs3 literally everything and everyone not funding you i.e. Inisfree was just an attempted distraction. Every law, lawsuit, demand, bullying, rudeness, bait attempt, you name it. Every job, every bill. So stop feeding those proverbial trolls; ignore all contact/”ppl” so as not to encourage/feed/fuel/grow anything but you, thus Inisfree. Amen.
Irlj. I now sense that my wife telling me i was going too fast…was her saying i was drafting spells that still needed and deserved to be allowed to manifest before i drafted more. The travel was right to slow down, too –it just should have been my choice, and inspired by loving offers from the hotties along the way; they were going too slow, i not really going too fast, except that they needed verbal commands in phase 2.
Anyone who says jesus is their savior is saying that dying and death save them from living and life; they are shamefully declaring only darkness and deathcult lies, which are obvious lies and harmful as literal hell, are what is in their veins. Roger that.
Extremely hot girls appeared when i lost my cool and cried out; ambi, the toll booth parking garage girl in Washington for Lowe’s trng, etc., but most flawless hotties so far were just there; i didnt need to break down to energy surge and manifest them…
I thought the taproom caesar salad would be meh, but it was the best i’ve ever had! It is also traditionally an appetizer, but i chose to save it for later, and it turbed out to be the best dessert! Wow! Maybe the hotties r finally this good… They’d better be, having had 39 yrs to calibrate to me.
Irlj. It occurred to me that maybe all those hotties Were trying out, and Do know my huge task, and Did show respect by being in shape and where i would see them and making sexy noises without interrupting… Maybe they aren’t upset at all, and Will be back, knowing i accepted and want them. Maybe they knew i needed to see and only briefly see them when they showed up. The witch in New Orleans tarot shop, too. Amen.
It has always been my nature and talent and superpower to dissociate from the humans who are not my people, and to correct things (i.e. via my spells/un-de-sexualization, restoring their balance, thus their destressing/calmness, thus their health). So why not do those things fully? I have now. : ) Full dissociation/isolation, full speed ahead w Inisfree’s (i.e. My) culture. Amen. …It has also always been my nature to write spells unifying great things, starting with that time I wrote the names of the three-letter agencies together on construction paper with crayon –and I now wonder if that, even in my toddlerhood, had been powerful enough to start then teaming up together…and noticing I had caused that.
Look at the percentages; ~40 nations of 190ish (~20%), hundreds of hotties and several character superior manifestations (also ~20% on my chars dir list?), millions injured/disabled/sterilized or killed by the purge (estimated tens of millions out of 7.6B; ~10%?). And that hurricane Harvey they say cost TX 1/5 of its economy… So my power/manifestation/spell is at 20%? Pretty good, considering I didn’t even realize it was happening; imagine now that I have focused and further isolated and believed in it. (also: ~30% of the exodus route, even solo and poor!; imagine how easy the rest will be w $ & loyal teammates who worship me; ultimate faith!)
…
This could also mean I am 1/5 the way through the post-Shift national-focus level the Mayans taught of; global was the previous and briefer focus, and cities or cultures are next and a longer focus.
Maybe me shutting down all those “ten” hotties…was still my superpower defeating them/bs; dissociation automatically applied. Good. Fuck those rude dumbasses. They can try harder next time. Amen.
Real/logical/manifesting or not, it sure vibes and is better thinking of myself this way…and making the 3D computer model, etc. : )
Technically i got to retire w passive income at 33ish; 2015, 3 yrs after the Shift, right when my writing/spells said I was, more or less, in Inisfree (i.e. being myself at last, fully detached/dissociated from the humans).
Maybe “they” keep using losers to annoy u bc they know it will motivate u to use your spells power to purge more, keeping their own hands clean. Clever. Regardless, it needed doing. In a way, it means they r doing your will, not using u, bc they r providing fuel/catalysts which help u manifest things…which u hadn’t been able to cause via firepower yet.
A dozen errors in the Weddings years spotted and corrected, all ‘ironed out’ now. At last!
It Was a numbers game, but not w humans; with TIME; having confidence and edu and xp w chicks…never produced dif/btr results. Letting years pass produced some improvement; they started chasing Me, …but, overall, their attitudes r all still creepy and shit, one sided, sexist.
I rmbr how Ambi’s words repeated in my mind when I returned to the Clifty Inn upon settling in here in Madison for the 2nd time since 2015; I saw the orange-tan elf model girl playing cards at the table, and heard Ambi’s advice, “Remember, when you meet an elf, to be polite.” However, equally powerful, spoke my blood/instinct, reminding me that this girl playing cards was too tall and resting-bitch-faced, and with a tall man, thus not my type, and not being polite to Me, because she wasn’t what I had politely and correctly been asking for. This duality is a Phase 2 sign, thus I was right to disregard them and continue on. I was polite, and arguably more so than them. Also, the Phase 3 Ambi I have chosen to be destined to marry… would and will advise Them to be polite to Me, already Realizing I have been Very polite this whole Time.
I asked for and demanded ALL hotties I liked be sent to me at ONCE (TOGETHER), …and Ambi typist was the first to rp/spellcraft that for me; my birthday orgy in 2021. Great sign and alignment and prayer answered, at least in part (i.e. all HER hotties, but not ALL hotties). It is good enough for Phase 2. Amen.
When my site is done, and my 3rd model (clay was first, styro was 2nd), I still have novels, fitness, and tanning to do.
(I shall not worry of the onset/return of depression even though I am still in this incompatible U.S. state.)
All 3 of those dumbass “friends” (the ones I tried to encourage to be kings) would have taken the vax if i hadnt alerted eli…and 2 still did…and his “friends” did; none were worth my time. I am glad i used ALL those assets and bounced. Good riddance.
All that traveling taught me that no matter how good and communicative i am, and no matter how pure my intention or singular my vision, and no matter how hard or well i work, until humans are wiped out…there will never be a good trip or town or team (in phase 2). So be it; end them all (kill all the incompatibles I have met so far). Amen.
40ish countries and all of them sucked the same way. Imagine how much More upset and drained i’d be if i’d gotten to see them all. Wait until i can force my way in, and not just see them, but conquer them. Amen. Phase1 was them out of reach. Phase2 was me getting to go, but the gross mix of inappropriate culture. Phase3 is me aligning them to MY culture, and them choosing to, or else.
Ambi hopefully learned that showing up whenever she wants and being rude and blameshifting sexistly…isnt gonna work. Relying on her looks wasted her own time several times in a row now. She’ll have to learn manners or the next manifestations will replace her. Maybe she can see through time and wants to not distract me while i finish my amazing spell…and maybe she likes how bold my spell and trips are, but still; she was very disappointing so far. I asked for a hot queen, not a standard retard.
Every opportunity i gave them to behave decently, they squandered, showing me their worst, not their best. So now they get the same in fair return; the worst –i.e. extremination/extinction– continues to hammer them. Amen. (Whether i said what i want or not, or tried their culture or not, or even talked or not, they always were the same one retarded moody. Roger that; they r defective. Chemtrails or not, i grew up here, too; there is no excuse for them treating me so badly even when i was peaceful and protecting them.)
Humans being rude and betraying every time…actually made it easier on me; it freed me from any distractions, it let me do whatever i want all the time without believing the karma psyop anymore, and it keeps showing me they really are dumb animals, not ppl, no matter how long i focus on images of the ones i like. In short, they choose evil every time…bc that is all they are. Literally none of them showed any respect or even basic childhood manners like introductions. All were moody and criminally insane. Thus we continue purging them. Amen.
I am the main character, evident from the pov and my accomplishments and my spell/s theme. I might not have all the powers yet, but i am the main character.
I tried being nice for 40 years. That didnt work at all. Now we will try 40 billion years of stomping on their balls. Amen.
If i had known pele was going to be such a bitch, and her ppl vibe so badly, i would not have gone, and would have saved my money. I made it easy for her to talk to me. Now she is not only going to have to be the one to travel to me, but also genuinely lovingly convince me to forgive her and speak at all.
…
I just realized that the hurricane and volcano at Hawaii after I left… weren’t her throwing a tantrum about My behavior; they were her trying to punish and rid herself of the human scum on her islands who had offended Me. She was erupting to do my Will. Amen.
If they wanted me to breed like they said, why didnt they just give me my inheritance and polite girls?; i would have bred right away… Because they wanted me to be a slave, not just a breeder; they wanted me to add debt, and to accept bad behavior/treatment. Since they revealed that through their stupid actions, they lost any chance of me even risking spawning. Now all they can hope for is being enslaved themselves –and killed routinely to keep such dumb animals aware of their place.
I am sooooo glad the 34tauri dir y subpgs r finally touched up, making So much more sense
I was right to jobhunt and add trng and try to save and invest and fund mySelf; no one was helping, and hotties were behaving uniformly defectively. I was Also right to give up on jobs, as they were toxic every time in a row, and doing 2 things sends mixed signald; focus fully on the important one to manifest it sooner, better, and forever. A risk? Sure, but one that saved my sanity, health, and heart, and respected my gift/s.
The deja vu means my brain is working well, remembering details from several years ago. I am proud of my new progress. I know it is right for me and will manifest.
The longer u hold on and keep writing this spell, the more mindblowingly perfect it (and the hotties) will be. The marines sucked bc it was a brief spell w no awareness u could manifest more than just getting in. You have made the inisfree spell far btr. It will work. Amen.
Was it chance that things happened so i could go on all those trips? Was it chance i saw those hotties? Was it my looks and/or other things that attracted some of them? Was it my spells? My intent and focus and essence? Who can say… But if my spells were at least partially to thank for triggering them to appear, then hopefully my latest round of spells about all of them returning and marrying me as polyamorous hotwives…will work even better. Idk how i can risk trusting their kind after what they kept doing all these years, but…the alternative is stagnation and demise; there is a big risk either way now. I hope by abandoning travel for now, …my manifesting, if it really has been happening like it seems to’ve w ambi, graciella, sabrina, and others, …will manifest them ALL…incl my MPHA and ICVs…and home; Inisfree. Telling others didnt get them to help hold and manifest the vision; humans prayed and spoke aGainst it, then just didnt care. But Cali kinda did…and Kola more so. Even the ambi typist “sent” many to accept 2nd homes and helping projects there. …so maybe…now…i Can accept the hotties, and count on them to help manifest it w me.
It keeps occurring to me that kola just spent those few weeks buttering me up…and describing a many-step drink recipe…to hide the fact it was poison…and so I would believe it was for help…and try it.
And just like that, i finished the CP Hatches! AND every webpage update; ALL my webpages are up to date now!!! Eeeee
…
Maybe, like me, “god” / the gods…felt in the mood to do parts of what i asked, then needed breaks and rest before resuming. Maybe they weren’t always energized or in the mood. Hm.
Even having many characters and shows was a form of chaos incarnate/manifesting, but I gotta admit… in phase 2 becoming 3, …that sure turned out to be fun and interesting to write; without those others, all powers would be in Me, and I wouldn’t have any hotties to fuck. In this case, that much almost-chaos worked out well. Millions of the excess chaos-NPCs are self-euthanizing now, too, so all is well –well enough for phase 2.
Maybe they r powerless but to answer…and powerless but to leave when i don’t trust or accept them… Even Pele.
…
Losing contact w the ambi typist and other typists allowed me to finish my spell.
…
Calling out to them proved some answer, and many are face flawless, and some answer over and over, better each time. Them answering and vibing that they had answered…was a way for me to confirm/commission that type of leveling up.
…
Now let’s see if they also do my will be answering my call/command for them to be body perfect, strip to show me, and show me their superpowers politely in ways which can only heal and protect me.
Amen.
–
June:
(possible duplication from previous months this year; the wave of ideas and annotations was wonderfully staggering)
7:15pm on 1 June 2022, I went out on my porch after wrapping up another wave of work toward the school of my own, and happened to look up and see a rainbow overhead. It was another first; first horizontal instead of standard vertical one, and somewhat nacreous-looking, all without any rainfall today.
…
After all the lies the typist told; virus and politics and relig and doctor and who she loves and what she wants to give and who was rude and who was to blame and on and on, …I am no longer sure I should stay put here like she advised, …even though this is phase 2.
Phase 1 forced me to move always.
Phase 2 hasn’t been much better, only moves with isolation and more choice.
It doesn’t matter though; I can’t afford to move without her, and I am getting more work wrapped up than I would have ever imagined.
They kept trying to stress me and force a fight, thinking only that is power, not realizing or even able to understand that my powers r being calm, being loving, and seeing through bullshit lol.
Phase1 I was shown softdisclosure of the ‘characters’. Phase2 was the attempt to write w humans about them, always resulting in me having to extract and heal them. Phase3 is them, now healed by my spells, showing their real selves to me in person, destined to unite as my first real family, amen.
I keep hearing the thought/message: Just by writing it, I am making it so; humans tried so hard to brainwash me into believing and working within their system…because 1) that would prevent me from realizing I can make mine without any tech or complexity or dependency or help from them, and 2) it would maintain/manifest theirs –which was an illusion/lie the whole time, entirely dependent upon me if ever they could get me to accept its bs.
I really hope Kola and her characters return when my profile updating (spells completing) is complete; I really like/d them. Either way, she was a great catalyst for this latest huge step.
it is the best sign/s of all that I: rejected all bad, stood alone for what is right, disregarded rude losers, ignored and blocked demonic attacks, chose only the finest good people, committed to making and protecting the healthiest community and family, trusted my instincts over the blatant lies and scams of others, accept only loyalty and worship my way, heal in nature, heal nature, and have seen many of my most beloved characters come to life even sexier than their playbys/inspiration –exactly how my spells wrote; flawlessly sexy. All these things prove I am god, my way works, and all evildoers get destroyed and steamrolled in my path. Amen.
Complete the profiles, then wait; let go, work on other things, giving them time to manifest. You wrote of brief first encounters before, and got that. Now you have written of returns, loves, marriages to you, and them staying together with you as forever family; that is manifesting, too. Amen.
They had even that SEAL at Dart lie test you lol; for sending such an operator to do such a thing, they are scared, desperate, and sloppy, not as smart as they seemed or claimed. They tried it again w the gimpy former recon jarhead shit talker in vegas. Pathetic.
They still havent learned; no matter how many since lfb play victim and try to get me to chase, i never do, yet they keep trying that. They really are stupid and worth continuing to ignore. No matter how pretty they dress up to be, or how brightly they smile, i reject their bad behavior (the bad signs of concealing their bodies, not saying hi, not oursuing ME, etc.) every time… I am so consistent and clear, even publishing online every detail of my thinking, and Discord chatting about it, yet…they keep failing the same way every time. Truly disappointing and pathetic of them. But, hey, it keeos me completing my spells, so…whatever works, I guess. I have hidden nothing, and gone everywhere, trying my best to learn all from them, so why do they not reciprocate? Why do they still have tantrums and autism, not going anywhere w me, hiding the one thing that can earn them a chat w me?
Did ambi look dif in each state…or was that just disguises/illusions?
Fiction or theory or hobby or not, my work is honest and correct and genius, and all other work/jobs were just gross bs that wasn’t lucrative anyway; there was no point in trying to work w humans anymore, and every reason to make my life’s work which kept healing me… full-time.
Me just writing it makes it so. Humans tried to trick everyone into believing and manifesting that more complex stuff is necessary, but it is not. Me writing what i write…makes it so.
Maybe the humans were used to test and ensure i choose to dominate even over their “laws”.
Have i been doing the will of all those created characters this whole time? : )
Has my instinct to do this website and saga…been me hearing and answering their cries and prayers? Yes.
Maybe you keep working on your saga/spells…bc u r persuaded by all those real ppl…to use your power to save them, as none of them apparently were capable of overcoming that which humans wrote about them. IOW: you may be sensing the sum of Their urges and needs to heal, be free, and link up invincibly with you. Amen. What if they all want to be w you…as much as you want to be w Them? : ) I think they do. Even smokin ambi said, vibing true that time, “you and only you / do not share me”.
Never look at that Celestine instructions list again; you do not submit to psyop lie garbage. Things work how You say now, and besides…no one Ever came forward to share the correct vision w you.
PreShift, they attacked, bit, resisted being w you, etc. – post-Shift, they supported more, did not bite, and resisted NOT being w you… – maybe it IS posb to trust them enough for good sex now…
Lol they told me i had to do everything their way. I now tell them they have to do everything My way. They ignored all my pleas and everything else. I ignore all their pleas and everything else. They refused to work w me. I refused to work w them. They wrote tons of laws without my consent. I wrote tons of laws without their consent. No matter how bully they chose to be, I just disregarded it and bullied them back harder –even to the point of crippling their economies just like I said back in Tx in the 2010s. Amen.
It occurs to me that my ‘dream’ of being nuked and floating down just fine in the orange glow…may have been a test of the ICV invincibility…while also making sure it stays shared-consciousness w me even when nuked.
Only MY bible (the biblor’an) and other works are canon; all other series and plots and everything are just unauthorized and void fanfic. Only copyrights i issue are valid. Amen.
Phase1 i was ugly, all around me were ugly, and i had no idea of my own. Phase2, some r hot, i am tolerable, and my idea is the holiest, wisest, and most beautiful and intelligent vision of all, ever. Phase3, hopefully i, like how caterpillars become butterflies, miraculously become handsome, and all my enemies die, and all i envisioned and love…manifests as my family and home; inisfree. Amen.
The site-access issue today got someone else to update the plugins and debug FOR you; let these phase2 moments be the blessings in disguise they keep being.
You finished the design AND the overhaul AND the clay model AND the wireframe model AND the first novels AND the 3d model AND the TOCs; you’ll finish the whole spell/site/manifestation soon enough.
Being in this neighborhood is not punishment or retirement, but a gift you manifested; greenbelt, free, quiet.
Sure, losers here do drugs and are disgusting lazy fatfucks and freaks, but they arent roommates or pestering you like in other waypoints.
It occurs to me that my yc cabin could not manifest until i had designed it; now that it is in 3d, it can manifest. Amen.
Same w my icgm and hangars etc.
Amen.
I can only hope the hotties will be helpless but to return to me, and that they can sense i deserve them, and that i am too busy rn, and that i was being polite, and that i was tortured thus careful, etc.. Either way, i own them all now, and they like that. Either way, they will align to me. Amen. Thus sayeth the lord.
…
So far, they werent supportive; they were needy rude distractions.
I was right to fight through, declining them, staying true to my vision and instincts.
I wouldnt get ANY of my spells or meditating or vision done/through if i was with them.
Humans were called to exodus in 2012; anything they have done since is meaningless rebellion from their lame species, thus i continue to ignore them. Until they align to my life’s work, worshipping me (as I have tried to worship/uplift/honor some of them), defaulting to seeing the obvious good in all i do, they will continue being destroyed, for their current vision/campaign is not aligned to mine, and my will is always supreme, vastly more powerful than theirs, even as a collective/civilization, for I am me, and they are just a peripheral nowhere near as powerful as they, always lying, pretend. Note how desperately they keep trying to distract and trick me into aligning to them, always nervous, always failing, always revealing their real intentions to me via the subtle signs. If they had gone on the exodus with me when I sensed it was time and told them to, 6,000,000 would have been allowed to survive, another 144,000 even in Inisfree. They did not, however, and so I have continued ending them all for that heinous crime, all the while completing perfect Inisfree, a.k.a. me, amen.
Humans have never had the intelligence to behave or write with me, so all those attempts are concluded, never to happen again. I had always intended in every interaction to uplift and encourage and include them, even learn from them, but they consistently showed me they are only dumb evil, lacking the capacity even for honesty and basic sentence forming, always accusing innocent people of what they themselves alone are doing; there was nothing for me to learn from them, they being the ones who should have learned from my good example. They forced me to go Old Testament, so now anything wrong at all which they do shall continue blocking and wiping out the rest of them, save only those who wholeheartedly love and submit to me like Sarah has. Amen.
I would rather be lonely a little while so i can use all my time to complete my vision/spell, then be free all the time to focus on its manifestation/s; it is better to get it done sooner and completely…so i sooner have more/all time to be w the ones who have started answering/forming for me
Caught up w all 3 games; creativerse, eve, and minecraft. Dumped all evil fake friends. Quit all evil liar slavery jobs. Have my own place again. Wrapping up all spells/webpages. Vision complete. Not a runaway proj after all. Learned more EVE mining things. All day every day is now mine to arrange. Gums r healing. I am smarter than doctors and dentists now. Characters r manifesting even sexier than the actresses who played them. Listening to a great rainstorm w overhead lightning as i fall asleep. Life is good. Not perfect –yet– but good.
I used to be so eager to meet and interact w ppl all over…but having traveled extensively and only met the same one dumbass rude uneducated autistic personality in them all, the only things i want now are to enslave, beat, and destroy them all for their unthinkable and shamefully ongoing crimes. The things their species does are unforgivable. They deserve nothing but the worst…forever. I am glad i stopped wasting my time trying to help and work w them. What a bunch of useless losers, the lot of em. Moody for no reason…and so much worse.
As annoying as all encounters have been, it did show me that the mayan consciousness focus thing is, in fact, as species-wide as they say
Such a dumbass typical bait-and-switch / twofaced liar bitch, saying i deserve the best…but only giving me the worst.
…
and saying to love whatever my heart loves, but then whining at me to change so many things.
Smh
The insanity and retardation of the humans, literally feeding corpses and poison to ppl…and abusing me at every stop…yet thinking Iiii was the rude/offensive one! HA
It doesnt matter than my current project has me self isolating, doing what the cdc wants ppl to do. What matters is that i am doing what works for my project/spell/s, and fugtards are keeping out of sight more, and millions just killed themselves, and millions more figs sterilized themselves, and many of the bastards who betrayed me did that to themselves.
Note how humans kill vegan animals; chickens, cows, sheep… and pigs are kinda grain slop based, …but they protect violent carnivores; cats, dogs, …and pick violent carnivores as national and holy symbols; eagles and lions, … but demonize other carnivores; dragons, snakes. Weird…
Irlj Sat21may2022.
After the major gah update and other site work today, …I really am glad I instinctively avoided any jobs and relationships; I would never have had the time or quiet to realize and formalize these huge breakthroughs/improvements.
…
Sun22may2022.
Stayed up all night, selfcare jacked for 7 or 8 hours, great nut, biggest so far, so nice that i can do this whenever.
I am still mad at bad humans and god/s, and my emotions are always valid. However, I shall also note here that millions did not become good or aware/informed enough to avoid the latest harmful scam, while I did; millions or even billions to one (or to the few hundred or thousand now aware of that scam), I seem to have either destiny or luck on my side, and certainly superior thinking and analyzing skills. I seem to be a protected one –protected by my own wisdom, if not also other things.
Note what happened today: avoiding ppl got your temp house tidied and you to take a bathroom break before hiking, then it got you hiking a waterfall creek, then it got you back on that creek the other way, then it got you to a nice dinner and a pretty pink sunset. Also, there was a cute short blonde teen girl at the restaurant.
The coconut shrimp here makes Panda Express no longer wanted.
It still sucks, but it is btr than Panda’s walnut shrimp.
All the good work and deeds didn’t matter; humans still treated me like crap. All the poverty and ugliness and cussing and other bad didn’t matter; some flawless hotties still showed interest. All the unhealthy things didn’t matter; I still healed and understood more than others. All the healthy things I did didn’t matter; my ears etc. still haven’t healed. All my focus didn’t much matter; humans still ruined every trip and pretended my focus was to blame. All their focus on doing evil didn’t matter; their civilization and evil punishment system is still being ripped apart. Some things simply happen at certain times, regardless of focus, planning, schedule, or anything else. In other words, while phase 2 has clearly been for me to plan and transition, I need not worry nor care along the way, nor work or save up, because costs keep being covered for me, and babes hotter than the hottest even on TV keep trying. Eventually the absolute best ever, perfect in every way, including how I require them to behave, will arrive and do all I need and want them to. Amen. – All their shit talking and record fucking up…didn’t matter; I remained and further became greater than them all, completing all my expeditions And life’s work. All their attempts to control me didn’t matter; I sensed, ignored, and overcame them all. Me focusing on the good didn’t matter; humans still ruined every outing and game, staying as hideous as could be.
In phase1, it was all about experiencing gross rude hell after hell. In phase2, it was about standing up for myself, which I have done and done fully, as well as can be… but that obviously won’t be enough; humans have chosen to keep being as out of line as they always have been, clearly still phase1 retard beasts…even though some are younger than me. Thus age still isnt the deciding factor in what the consciousbesses are focused on, nor is the time/timeline, and phase3 is required and coming, bound, …the time when I have already finished standing up for myself, my focus and power now to crush all my enemies, thus making it so I never have to stand up for myself again, the only people remaining… being those whose nature is to stay aligned to me, doing what I want them to.
Note how they kept trying to kick me out or force me out or lock me away, demanding i change (corrupt myself) and leave (more change), even to the total degree (dying via accepting their deathcult lie/s), …and when i finally did leave… they tried to change/corrupt me by pressuring me to return to take care of them lmfao; always negative against everything, even when they got their own way.
That deathcult ldr claiming angels mating w humans killed them during birth…vibed as the lie it is; angels have perfect intentions and focus, and their offspring would not be giants, but energy-based beings who could be any size at will, almost ultimate shaleshifting. The only way humans would be hurt…is by their own change/harm/negativity/blameshifting assumptions; bad humans would get hurt by trying to breed w angels, then resisting the purity or goodness, and by choosing to be inflexible/stubborn/negative during childbirth… Wow; it was not angels who were told not to share love w humans, but humans who were told not to try to change what the angels are; the angels were not told anything, for they r close to god, thus already always sensing and knowing what god wants, but humans were too self-harming to survive the purity of angels, as humans seem to always change themselves harmfully, while angels cannot be changed at all. In other words, angels are naturally always pure beauty and knowledge, while humans, as far as I have observed so far, have always been pure fools/liars. This means that even when angels share love w them, it would always be the humans who caused pregnancy in humans, as angels cannot cause or give birth, and the humans would assume their own babies would be big like the any-size always-strong angels, and assume they themselves could not do such things, thus the dying in the childbirth, and human pregnancy/childbirthing always being an attempt to change/corrupt things…
I think all the hotties really were clandestinely trying out, put there for me to see, many around them sensing that I liked them even when frustrated, and the ones who got moody when I did not flirt… were moody not because I did not bend to them, but because they could tell I had recognized them as perfect, thus they were ready…and now hating that the losers before had made me guarded. The hotties had to wait for my lead…bc they Are submitting to me…
…
Regardless, some vibed as trying out, but all also vibed as being immature blameshifting scumbag loose cannons; phase2 mix. Unacceptable.
The 3k cc limit…means i can get my tats…and/or relocate w a full security deposit. Hopefully hotties will cover this For me from now on, though. Either way, it is nice being able to financially breathe more/again.
Some brains r 4d?; the reason it is said we only use a small percent of our brain… is because the other percent is being used in other times, maybe even in other timestreams/dimensions.
It may be that authors such as tolkien died…bc they didnt write themselves into their stories; they focused only on creating others. I instinctively wrote spells getting others to focus on supporting Me.
Deja vu again; tanning place. Whatever. Fuck this world.
Even if any of the hotties had behaved, the fugtards were still there and should never have been, and the death cults and murder “food” should not be, and that makes this a phase2 turn-off. No go.
Humans really are as stupid, evil, and useless as it gets; after four decades, they are still thinking that being hideous, and making every outing gross, and every hottie a rude creep, and every convo a pain in the ass dealing w retarded pussy bullies, and every call and text and offer a scam, and lying about the evils and unhealthiness of all their “food”, is somehow gonna eventually persuade me to give those literal psychos more chances. I will never give chances to such deranged selfdestructive monkeys and murderers and con artist wannabes again.
Memorial Day is the invaders’ (humanimals’) attempt at normalizing death. Don’t do it.
The pasta w pesto, oliveoil, salt, and pepper, paired w a pie dish of frozen grapefruit and orange juice, really has the flavors for Summer
They r still sending scraps and worshipping lies, murdering for food that murders Them, etc.; it is not time to try travel OR teaming up; wait until they start being sane and polite for the first time in 40 years.
You are never spinning your wheels when you are making so much progress on the site and model and your own body, and when you have leveled up to training and grading the hottest girls on the planet. Continue. Only They are spinning Their wheels by choosing to keep being stupid to me.
After how EVERY bitch behaved, i no longer feel lonely, and i Like being at peace, doing whatever i want evety day, having no nagging retard noisebox, and snuggling w my pillow.
Note how she never cared what bothered Me, but always bitched about what bothered Her, and how she literally wanted to torture and kill innocents in EVERY talk/rp, and got angry when i did things like explaining how to heal. She was literally poisoning herself and trying to kill everyone else With her. Just wow. Phase1 nosedive fail as bad as lfb.
Irlj. The more i was kind and helpful and myself, and the more they responded w mibdless anger, threats, insults, lies, and being TV xombies, the more i had to face the reality they were never good and could not be, only “good”… as cannon fodder and being made examples of.
They murder trillions constantly, and lie lethally, and then tell Me iii need to be more polite. Kill them all. Any hotties, enslave and beat into compliance. Amen.
The canadians Should have said 1) how can we help?, 2) you clearly have an amazing life of helping ppl, so we are honored to receive you, 3) the blk mark on your record doesnt make any sense in the context of your life or vibe, so u r obv innocent and got scammed, 4) since the usa lied about you, let us show we r btr than them/that, 5) we will make sure Our ppl don’t do anything bad to You.
But all they knew was mindless computer parroting.
And when i kindly asked to learn about their country, they got cunty that i didnt know their states are called provinces.
Wtf.
Want what you have; right now, that is the perfect golden self-manifested priceless opportunity to complete your spell.
The assumption/claim/propaganda that time travel requires high tech and is extremely risky…is more chaos-incarnate thinking/attempting; it tricks the gullible into believing, thus manifesting that. Who’s to say events don’t still work out as intended? Auz now can move through time like a True Brujah or God Himself, and Time does his will, all the events in it staying aligned the way Auz wants, regardless of what changes Auz makes in other eras. Amen. Our will is superior to / naturally dominant over time/all. Furthermore, time and all now loves doing what Auz wants them to, and always shall. Amen.
Elon Musk is an ex of what happens if you get momentum during phase 2, i.e. too early; you get tangled up for life in obsolete tech, employing and serving scum, not truly successful no matter how rich you become.
Did ambi say that husband line at the hotel bc her memory is what my spells wrote? I am equal parts curious and furious about her; I am glad and relieved and amazed and turned on she is real and better than megan fox, while also mad it took a nervous breakdown before she returned…and even then…she chose not to introduce herself… Wtf.
I will try to be happy about this; even though it vibed as her being bait or cruel or cowardly, …at least the face and body and hair and height of my dreamgirl exists…and she may have shown up because I needed to see she is real so I can stabilize and carry on…and maybe my writing really is spells that have helped open portals for her here, thus also making our union and family and marriage one day soon possible, too, even sure.
I learned the trick; disregard all humans, as all were the same defective…but then their dumbasses locked things down worse than the canada border tyrants lol…so…all i could do for now is refocus on me, completing my spell/s. I wonder when thry will manifest my city and Inisfreeans and invincible airships…like they seem to’ve Ambi, Sabrina, Rain, Kara, and others…
Was that sexy redhead at the Bozeman foodbank…Ariel? Sure vibes like her… and keeps coming into my mind with that idea/revelation/’tag’. : )
I’m actually excited I have Inisfree in 3D now
I’m actually excited to be completing my school classes webpages each morning.
I’m actually enjoying returning to the park here.
The first time i went to the tanning place, i just got the price and couldnt afford bc lower va payments…
Lol mav stole an enemy plane, i kinda did w this vehic. His exit runway was cratered, so is this parking lot; phase2 alignments xD
She did the most painful and tyrannical thing she could; the typist sided w the evildoers and risked the whole life’s work…but it have me the highest honors instantly, bc i chose to ban her and protect countless innocents.
Top Gun Maverick “hold my hand” and ambi-like actress…hits home. “Dont think. Just do.”; i will continue my life’s work, even behind enemy lines here, just like in this good message i was apparently destined to see. I will make it home; to Ambi AND Inisfree. I will complete this miracle I was made for. And all that trng to be rdy for aliens…and to have no help from even the usa…now makes sense and vibes as logical.
…
Top Gun Maverick was a perfect movie. I dreaded it would have gaylywood bs mixed in, but it didnt. Finally a movie that is okay.
…
and it, like my own saga, has become a kindhearted mix of fiction and real
“Play with the phone”; chill all day and soak up as much “feed” ideas and beauties as you can; you won’t have this luxury of allday time…in phase3; when they return…and your life w them begins : )
“Hiding from everyone”? I havent met ANY PPL yet. I havent seen ANYone; only mindless stupid rude asshole animals. It is impossible to hide from anyone, let alone everyone, when no real ppl exist yet. I would have sensed and loved them.
I am alone rn, so i appreciate that; there is no sense wanting those who chose not to be here for me. I appreciate who was there for me; me. I appreciate what i have; space from the loser humans.
I wasnt wrong to call out for them. I was ready and i deserved normal interaction. They were wrong to show up and not even introduce themselves, and to react autistically and evilly to my normal attempts at interaction. They were wrong to play with my emotions like that. They were wrong to be countless bait-and-switch tyrants. After the relentless abuses of phase1 AND 2, idk how i will Ever trust them… How will phase3 begin? It will require me to have power over them even in law. Forever.
If they hadnt been pure evil in all of phase1, and bait-and-switch mix/duality evil in phase2, u wouldnt have waited this long, thus you wouldnt have completed this much realizing and drafting and spellwork.
In phase1, i was always bullied, forced to stop using my love and dissociation power/ability. In phase2, i’ve gotten to use it more and more, all the bullying now reduced to mere pestering, always retarded requests and bluffs. In phase3, i won’t have to dissociate at all; i will have all i want, i.e. inisfree and the goddesses i wrote spells which started summoning/manifesting/perfecting them for me.
Note how the bitch told Me to appreciate what was in front of me…even though i Had been, and kept getting interFered with, and even though it was Others who hadnt appreciated Me when i was in front of them. They Forced me to Stop appreciating what was in front of me, getting Mad every time i Did appreciate things.
The hotties and bs jobs were not the diamonds in your path (i.e. unknown riches tripped over by the blind man in that story/proverb). Humans being scum were. You having to isolate was. You were; you were the diamond in THEIR path that THEY kept tripping over, never utilizing. You are the diamond in their Species’ path. YOU are the diamond in the GODS’ path.
Focusing on my website and model paid off big; ideas were built while fresh, thus easiest to visualize and maintain momentum with. This will allow me to refocus on my body/fitness next and soon and forever.
Humans use solids to make things. In other Ages, the strongest stuff might have been fluids…or liquids, etc.; what exists and works well today… would not have in the ancient past. Imagine in the first time… when everything was made of energy…or just thought; imagine the idea-equivalent of titanium alloy; imagine what the strongest thought would have been.
I long for and dream of the time when hotties, the sexiest of women, will be as trustworthy for me as i have been for me, and when they will be as easy for me to enjoy talking with and fucking as breathing has been. I long for this time… when they will be so enjoyable and reliable to me…that it won’t even occur to me to miss my solo transition time or phone or pc. I can get there if they will just start behaving sanely… : /
Boil it down; did you like any of their behavior or towns? No. Then you were right to keep flunking and moving on from them. Boil it down: Have any places you’ve been been vegan and polite to you? No. You are right to remain ready to move again. Amen.
I have no reason to love who isnt here. I will only love and want the hotties who show up and behave.
Irlj. A Master’s degree is the parrot with the best memory. A PhD is the one who trumps all that by expanding the whole Field, adding new, shaking things up when need be.
Pointless to add all these webpg details? No; pointless was trying to fit in w humans who kept shifting the goddamn goalpost. I feel Great about being so smart and experienced that i am literally PhD Xavier-level DESIGNING MY OWN REAL SCHOOL SYSTEM FOR GIFTED YOUNGSTERS. AMEN!
Tsb never vibed as being distant to help u become a stronger man; he vibes as what he/it is, retarded, rude, and pure evil, and a complete beta bitch and loser for putting his dick in two hideous loser bitches.
Are they “finding” mircroplastics and air pollution faraway bc it gets Blown there…or bc they r exPecting to find it; manifesting.
…
Could be as fake as the viruses/pandemics.
I’m not gonna change things about myself so i can game ppl into liking someone who isnt me; i am not gonna behave differently fot ppl who don’t like the real me. I am not gonna cater to entitled cowards. I am not interested in the attn or affections of scum who resist even simple concepts and normal essential interaction.
No movie actually had a budget; all things on tv and in theaters is the same psyop, paid for by taxes (theft).
Ambi was channeling through that typist. I know it. I can feel it.
and all signs point to it.
…
and when she said, “Don’t share me.” that didn’t just mean as a hotwife;
it means even with that typist; don’t let others sour/darken the pure sacred wife and mother image I see her as / have of her.
Amen; Ambi is mine alone now to write and keep and hold and love.
Amen.
Amen, amen, amen.
So it is. Forever and always. Amen.
even Nina Kimb’ advising to prepare for food shortages…
is the same old distraction / attention-whore tactic the humans have ALWAYS used; threat, fear, lie, bullying, negativity, naysaying, fearmongering, terrorism, bluff, etc.
and what always happens? nothing; I ALWAYS am the one to make it through.
I ignored their bullying in childhood with the death cult, and in high school with the prison threats, and in the military with the death threats, and after it even when they kept forcing me to be homeless, and on expeditions with all their OWN bullshit, and on and on, and ALWAYS it was the right thing to do, disregarding them, STAYing dissociated, always moving on.
I don’t need to prepare; my will always makes a way for me.
My way hasn’t always been easy, obviously, but it has always worked, whereas trusting the obvious liar-vibe-ing humanimals would have NEVER worked, keeping me stuck and worse off for SURE.
continue ignoring all the scare tactics.
the food shortage bs is as bs as the pandemic lie.
want your health, and want this solo quiet time, as much as you wanted the hotties before you realized they are all bait/scum.
want being alone in this interim phase… as much as you wanted them.
the phone mobile-hotspot slowdowns at the end of each month…
ensures I end up getting to see all the amazing energizing healing therapeutic love videos (porn) I never watched upon downloading them;
I’d forgotten and ‘pigeon-holed’ so many.
finally I get to enjoy them!
can’t work ALL the time; gotta have this balance of work and play/reward.
amen.
alarming/shocking how common adultery is? no; what is shocking/alarming is how there are still people trying to control/limit the love of the people they are supposed to be supporting as loyal family members.
humanity has really lost its way.
interesting how most nights are spent with dark-haired Ambi,
and most days with golden/sunny-haired Sarah and Amber ICV1.
lol i just realized technically i write/rp zed as being repo; kajirae recovery
my instinct was to ignore/reject/disregard even Drill Instructors’ tantrums pestering me to be louder;
I had no need to be louder, and was always the dominant one, never taking orders from morons who didn’t see the wisdom in all I did/do.
Note how frustrated, angry, confused, and hyper / loose-cannon they got whenever I wouldn’t do bad things like be loud for no reason, or obey orders that were illogical/wrong/stupid.
Note how humans have Always tried to tell me what to do, then always gotten angry even when I merely answered their questions or told the truth –i.e. instead of cowing down and copying them entirely.
Humans get so upset that they can’t control me, and show me that they can’t even control themselves.
This is ongoing proof/evidence that all their words/claims were false/lies; it was never about love or peace or unity or respect or maturity; it was always their attempt to corrupt/control me.
If it had been about peace and love, they would have been peaceful and loving to me, especially since I kept offering that to THEM! and even risking my LIFE in WARS to proTECT peace/freedom/love.
The only explanation for them being mad at me even after I proved I am a REAL HERO… is that they didn’t want peace, love, or a hero/warrior at ALL; they wanted a mindless SLAVE.
oh, the extreme irony and retardation;
telling me to appreciate what is in front of me / what I have…
is simultaneously her/it/them not following their own advice;
they aren’t appreciating ME as Iii am.
…
and claiming bad things drive a/the plot?
no; they drive ONE type of plot; the immature bully/tyrant plot.
anyone who isn’t happy and appreciative when things are going well…?
is in need of psychiatric or even asylum help.
or being killed –because they are evil.
it’s really amusing and pathetic and retarded of them…
that they didn’t make the slightest effort when it was easy for them; when i was right there in front of them;
and that, when i was polite, honest, educated, helpful, and selfless, heroic even, they still treated me like absolute garbage, lying about me at every turn.
now, if they want anything from me, it will be a THOUSAND times harder for them; they’ll have to pay me SO much more, even/just to TALK to me / MEET me,
as they have shown me I cannot count/rely on them, I cannot trust them, and they are literally insane and criminals, psychotic even in their DIET/S.
it just blows me away how stupid they are, ruining all their own chances,
disrespecting an obvious saint and hero to them…
That shows they really only want drama/chaos/suffering, even for themselves; they are Chaos Incarnate, the only real (bad) demons.
all that ‘science’ they claimed… is actually made up.
even the Periodic Table.
the Laws of Physics.
ALL of it; it’s all based on their assumption/s-fields;
they brainwashed students to believe it,
then they showed it “working” in many videos,
and not one of them touched on the fact that it is a result of overlapping/synergizing manifestation energy bubbles,
even though they hinted that this was possible with electron orbits.
well, it’s possible with EVERYTHING.
still, it is useful that they got all their own used to being weakminded, manifesting only a continuation of their overly-complex system/’science’;
this keeps things stable, and me the key; only I can will them differently, while all others keep them predictable as can be.
it also further shows/confirms that I am the dominant one, thus the real god; all of them, even their ‘greatest minds/scientists’ submit / are submissive to this clearly-flawed nonsense (their ‘science’).
they just parrot things, the ‘parrots’ (of their kind) with the biggest memories… being praised and paid the most.
parroting is not real science; it is mindlessness masquerading as being highly educated / smart.
You aren’t missing out on babes by choosing to avoid toxic places such as bars; you tried them and they were literally insane. Couldnt stand the smell or noise, either. There is no secret law or female nature preventing them from coming to You. This means they have been trying to bait you there, evilly refusing to honor your pure good/healthy nature. Continue the purge.
If things had worked out w any of those hotties, i would never have had the allday allnight time i needed for all these realizations
I wrote about the marines in 2002 and joined a year later… I wrote about the exodus and softening blows, and it happened years later, taking years; hurricane harvey and then lockdowns etc., and legs/portions of exodus. Why do portions keep being what manifests, not the whole? Why do the humans/ppl involved…always behave insanely? At least i knew better than to tolerate that toxicity; at least i went from being stuck w the marines…to doing the exodus alone. Also interesting is that the marines was one-way, while the exodus i did twice; up then bk dn. Does this mean inisfree will be three ways; go n spells, then dreams, and now for real/airship? …Standing up against bigger bullies was my powrr in childhood. Dissociating (realizing i could just ignore and evade them) was my power/instinct/focus/consciousness shift in young adulthood. Now that i am an adult / full man, i am not just dissociating, but holding the vision of what i knew to decide and develop…once i had detached from all the humans/system/relig diversion nonsense; 1) resist, 2) grow beyond, 3) choose my own path/system. It seems logical to me that inisfree has been happening, taking longer to take shape, bc i kept writing about it; i stopped writing about the marines and Then it happened. I stopped writing about the exodus and then it happened. So do i stop writing inisfree now, even though i have more ideas? Will it suck in some way…if i do not wait to make sure i have written it fully/perfectly? Babes r still manifesting too cowardly and tall; it seems a sign i should keep at this longer, willing full/final calibrations.
I dont think i am taking too long or misreading the signs. I feel good about my current revelations and builds and other work. I believe inisfree is getting ready for me. I can see that hotter babes are showing more interest. The typists have all faded back. It is like the rocket ship tubes disconnecting for launch. And i had my test ‘flight’ 1/3 of the way there. It is almost time. Amen. And the dissociation/solo has been done for years, so next is the team i have sought and called for and spellcrafted all along. Amen.
…
Always boil it dn; do you feel good around the humanimals? No.
Do you feel good w yourSelf and w your daily selfTasking? Yes.
If youth hadnt sucked, i wouldnt have done the corps stuff. If the corps hadnt sucked, i wouldnt have done inisfree.
Cracklin’ Oat Bran no longer has BHT
little improvements continue.
it’s something…
decent enough for phase 2
Note how Kola did the same thing as the pharma cartel;
“If you just take this which will make you sick, I’ll help you / open the border/s.”
Also note how I ended up suspecting and declining BOTH.
Phase fuckin 2; same old enemy/demon/retards/humans, and me continuing to sense/pierce/perceive, dissociate/evade, and overcome/defeat them all.
Amen.
…If they’d actually been good people, not liars/assassins, they would have just done what I said/asked/wanted –AND I wouldn’t have had to even ask; they’d have funded me AND kept the borders open for me.
THAT is how ACTUAL good/aligned/destined/Celestine people behave.
until ALL of them do things MY culture’s way, they are NOT my kind/people, thus it would be WRONG to be nice to them, let alone to mingle/spawn/mix with them in ANY WAY.
they must acknowledge me as what I AM; godking of Inisfree and Creation, NOT as what they WISH they could reDUCE me to.
any who try to change me, including who try to get me to chase them, when THEIR sexy females should be pursuing ME, is/are WRONG.
…
until the only humans left on the Earth are vegans who support me every way I want them to, the humans are fallen/corrupted and shall be further purged. Amen.
i keep thinking… maybe if i keep going into the park her enough, it will calibrate to me; only hotties, not just more and more almost-hotties, etc.
Now I CAN’T get to Argentina without the force of an exodus worth of people…
Interesting; things seem to be aligning to MAKE/REQUIRE what I wrote…
even when I try to push/scout/evade ahead.
The thought keeps occurring to me that the hotties/characters showed up / manifested / answered my call/s…
because they knew I needed to see them to have reason enough to keep going.
Should I be GLAD they showed up and moved back out of sight?; it kept me from going crazy, it calmed me down just enough, and it directly contributed to me picking back up with my spells / life’s work.
Maybe they risked a LOT, or used a lot of magic/energy/power, to get here (to me, or to the time period I am in)…
Maybe I should be glad they did it how they did.
it is another foolish human assumption to conclude that “it must be aliens” whenever they find evidence of sudden perfect/great builders;
the ancients did not necessarily bring to Earth the wisdom they developed;
it just as well may be that they never needed to build, and always knew those things, only applying what they already knew would work/last through the coming Dark/Deathcult/Invader (Humans) Age.
Fri3jun
Went to the park at 8pm, saw several hot teen girls in short shorts and skintight shirts. Too bad they behaved phase2; not directly rude/evil, but not engaging and feminine either.
3 smokestacks/towers…phase3 sign? And naturally phase3 is about triplets, not couples
The rp idiots were my buckets of water to slap. Being in ameritardland was my buckets of water to slap. Being limited to the minecraft build is my buckets of water to slap. It has helped. It has worked. Things have started manifesting as I wanted; mil, trips, hotties, purge, etc.. If it hadn’t stayed sucky, I would not have spent this much time perfecting my spells, thus something imperfect wpuld have manifested / been settled on.
I enjoyed feeling no deja vu when updating the auzdome w all rows, spaces, and ‘seat’ nbrs today.
What happened when you trusted obvious idiots and poeered through instead of trusting your instincts? You met endless losers who disrespected you no matter how nice you were, wasting your time. What happened when you trusted your instincts? You got endless adventures, revelations, health recoveries, and life’s work progress. Trust your instincts.
The moment they lied about and bullied me in middle/high school, they committed an act of war and war crimes. Every offense since has continued this war. They really are dumb and insane to think they could ever persuade me to trust them w loving interaction at this point. At best, their sexiest can be my slaves, all others dying. At worst, and most likely so far, all of them shall die. 40 yrs…and they still haven’t digured out that lying and being rude…has never gotten them liked and trusted by me, and never will. Lmfao
The titan (unavailable issue), and trans, and pharma liar parrots …really killed all desire i had to play eve : / …and them backing loser ukraine…and the queers in their shitty evil video.
What a way to go off the rails and be completely unrelated to their own game/lore.
“Letting go” only gives peace to submissives
“You were rude.” = defaulting to the negative, making no effort to understand reality, and might as well be the default-neg “relatives” demons/retards. “Why did you pass through like you did?” = objective/neutral, attempting to learn, somewhat smart maybe. “What you did was heroic and amazing and taught us to behave better to you.” = positive, already understanding and speaking reality/truth, thus actually smart enough to warrant talking to / answering / teaching. I was never rude; I always did my best to be polite, giving space, not intruding, paying attn to body language, waiting for signals, etc.; anyone claiming I was rude is a phase1 demonic scumbag to be disregarded and blocked.
It was a relief seeing hotties in clifty, starting w the one seeking my attn in nov, then the babes at the inn last month, then the tan leggy teens yesterday evening, and today the almost-sylvanas in black shorts and black bra, and the toned-shoulders white sports bra one today who i saw a 2nd time when walking out. If only they’d like me and engage…and help w my situation. I guess it’s still phase 2. Maybe they and this realm will calibrate in time…
It was nice seeing the normal fluffy clouds the day after i asked…and more hotties after wanting that, too
It’s nice to think these hotties r all presenting themselves to me in clandestine public interviews, and that even when they turn or walk on…they r doing so to give me a 360deg view of them.
2 ppl asked for directions (in the park) but they weren’t hot chicks asking for me to fuck them and their sexy girlfriends; it is still phase 2 for a bit. Whatever. My phase1 straining got me to phase2, and i have done the designing and vision holding work to get me to phase 3.
It vibes as a test, not love; real ambi clearly knows who i am and where i’ll be, so why hasn’t she let Me know it is her, introDucing herself? A normal (good and loving, supportive) woman would introduce herself to me, not keep waiting to see if i will assume it is her. Her appearances so far suggest she is not there to make me happy, but to test if she can bend me to her will. No bueno, puta. Adios. Learn manners and try again…but after all those typical-cunt appearances, how could i trust her even if she Did start Seeming to behave?
Socks off, feet out all night, still had great dreams, only positive sexy ones; sammantha on the phone happy, then in car w me beautiful tan blonde arms, then walking through a Montana skyscrapers-row military city, then a sexy white brunette sitting on the floor by some product shelves enjoying me attracted to and talking with her, then me flying inside and meeting back up w the sexy healthy positive sammantha! Definitely a phase2 calibration <3
“Don’t call for them before you are ready”? Wrong! THEY were the ones not ready; THEY were the ones who were rude and unhelpful, not even speaking. I have been ready and committed to this since 2010! Blaming me / assuming iii was the wrong one…is sgt-williams-smallmansyndrome lying/blameshifting. It is the same demon approach lfb took! No more!
Ambi, sabrina, graciella, rain, and others showed up…and were face-perfect, height perfect, fashion perfect, voice perfect… If my spells r doing that, then inisfree is perfect, as are the other characters, so my solo focus monk time in this phase2 is fully worth it. Imagine if i had settled for the imperfect before; i would have never seen/caused these flawless wonders. Hold on.
…
Strange that they obey my spells/calls to show up and be hot, but Not (yet) my spells/calls to behave, such as by showing me their tits and pussies for inspection and commissioning.
I always made/make it out. Every place so far has been bad, and I always felt sad and worried, wondering how I would escape, but I always did/do. I will from this latest shit-hole, too. To where, idk, but I will.
If i had known every job would have wronged me, i never would have jobhunted Or gone bk to school. If i’d known how abusive every bitch was going to be, i never would have talked to Any of them. If i’d known the ones i wrote about…were going to show up but never say a word to me, i never would have called out for any of them. If i’d know every trip and country and town was the same evil psycho bullshit, i never would have traveled. Maybe it is better to stay alone and never try. Phase3 will just have to come to Me. I’m not playing this sick disappointing game anymore.
If i quit the site updates, i’d have literally nothing else but exercise… Maybe i should continue it, for my sanity. Things manifest regardless. And thry don’t fizzle bc i dont talk to them; even when i talk, they fizzle or tantrum. The ppl i summoned should donate to me and team up w me, not leave after refusing to talk or team up.
If inisfree is as perfect as ambi and sabrina and graciella and the other hotties Looked, then i am in great/perfect shape. Maybe even the timelines/histories of the characters i wrote about are that perfect now, too, all thanks to my writing/spells. Maybe that makes me the greatest man, healer/doctor, and god of all… : )
It seems phase1 isnt just a time, but every time i try to work w humans, even for the exodus. It seems phase2 is when i Don’t try to work w them. Phase3…well…i guess that is when no trying is necessary, the manifested hotties being perfect in body And approach to me.
Maybe all those awful ppl, trips, towns, restaurants, countries, jobs…was so i would not worry or care when they all start being killed.
Maybe they needed 40 yrs of me rejecting them every time they tried to blame me when only they were rude…to teach them it is never okay and will never work or be allowed. Idk. Just a thought.
Every time, i got the worst hand; bicycle but spleen, congressional appointment then taken, corps then nonrecd, jobs then forced to quit from corrupt bosses, panic attk relief but poisoned, free “healthcare” but scam, paid trips but ruined, relocations but too poor to stay, hotties but insane to me, vehicle trade in but contract agreement betrayal and repo harassment, exodus route but lockdown halfway, etc.; curious how my focus was to stay and go all the way each time, yet that was not what manifested. Only my dreamcity designing has remained…
Listening to the rain and frog this evening after sundown is really nice.
What a thought: the hotties i seek…are as isolating and frustrated…as i am…and for the same reason; they want and need Me to accept Them. And they will Always return to try again w me…just like i willalways want to return to Them. Untilwe perfectly unite, which is coming soon, amen.
All the sexy females must be as attracted to me as I am to them (meaning they r now required to be). They also must see me as god, lime how I see them as goddesses. It only works for me to uplift them that way if they are uplifting Me as their god.
Focusing on the girls did not work; they stayed rude etc.. Being myself didnt improve their behavior either. Shifting my focus to me and my work did not cause them to fizzle away. Not talking to them didn’t either; even when I Did talk to them and genuinely care, they acted the same rude dumbass way. Thus i remain focused on what worked; my work got better when i focused on it. So did i. They didn’t. How it is…for phase2.
I keep getting the feeling/idea/message… that “they” (the hotties I’ve always loved and called out to/for)…
CAN’T help but answer my summons…
and CAN’T help but leave when I don’t embrace/speak with them…
because I DO get whatever I want and focus on…
and the sooner I plow through my PC amassed stuff, completing the Inisfree design,
the sooner they WILL all reappear…
b/c my will DOES speak/move them…
Amen. : )
so I will finish this ‘leg’/task/step; so I never have to let go of them again;
so they NEVER have to leave again; so I CAN stay focused on them, thus my/our love,
which WILL make them as happy and relieved as it will/does me.
AMEN!
Sahara lush 500yrs ago? That is right about the time when the invaders (humans) showed up; 1600s Space war. Sounds like Djinn and Atlanteans converted the Sahara to slow or stop them for a while.
1% of the world is vegan? I really Was right to will 99% of then terminated. Amen.
If they think for one Second I am going to interact w their rude stupid psycho asses, wow…they are even dumber than i detected.
I hate that “law of attraction” psyop lie. I stayed brave but met cowards. I studied and got smart, but met idiots. I offered love but got insults and threats. I was patient but others were not. I was healthy but didnt meet others who were. I avoided deathcults but kept encountering their retarded followers. I stayed focused on what i love, such as travel and designing, but no one cared, and travel got banned… Every time i gave a fair chance to anyone, whether in business or love, i got scammed intentionally and hard. Maybe in phase2…humans stay focused on what they love…just like i am…so i technically AM attracting that type of person…even though we are attracted to and focused on dif things. Still, it is very disappointing …and if ever i had power, i would have to use it to rid this world of everyone i have met. I still can’t believe how wrong and cunty they were…no matter how kind i was… If the law of attraction worked, why didnt i meet brave smart kind compatible ppl? Maybe it only works n phase 3… : / …maybe the law of attraction can be said to work…in that the scum always left, and peace returned to me, bc i sent out peace, and all nonhumans were kind to me, …so it partially worked/works, just not around humans… Interesting.
The ambi typist didnt say fucked up things to get me to end contact; it said fucked up things frm the start, and Did fucked up things, like not showing Up, not helping, not even trusting or respecting me… Smh. And i was kept so desperate by the scum humans of this world, i actually tolerated and looked forward to its lame texting-only contact. Fk.
Complexity and certain conditions are not necessary for life; all may have consciousness and life. Only humans obsessed w drama/death/complexity would ever think or claim that the same level of selfdestroying overcomplexity is “required”.
So many teen&preteen hotties / daughters (i.e. before the fake school system had filled their minds with impurities/distractions; their behavior was their own) made it clear they wanted me; the alignment happened…even though i am not hot. But i guess i am in Their eyes/hearts. Amen.
Telling me to ask for what i really want…1) is still bullying and trying to dominate me, and 2) hasn’t resulted in me being Given what i want…so far.
Every sexy female in Creation is now loyal to me, worships me, and does everything she can to support and please me, and it will remain this way forever, all of them loving it, and everyone supporting us as we do this, regardless of age, amen.
I should never have had to ask or explain or prove Anything. Until all worship me, and until everyone i dislike is dead, and only sexy girls loyal to me, and fit guys loyal to me, remain…I am not yet w my people, and not yet being respected appropriately. Even the gods and goddesses must and shall worship me. Amen.
FOMO or loneliness… After all the humans I’ve met, I know I didn’t miss out on Anything satisfying/good. FOMO was just an attempt to hurry me inti settling before my powers finished crystalizing. It is posb nothing exists outside my sphere of senses anyway.
I havent worn jeans in months and months lol
Females expecting males to “have game” and buy them drinks and open doors and pull out chairs for them…is unfeminine; those females are trying to manipulate/dominate. Females should be the ones building up pickup lines / game. I was disappoint with All females so far…bc None of them had “game” –bc their brains had become vestigial; as lazy and atrophied as can be, bc of the sexist antifeminine antimasculine backwards modern “culture” where guys do everything for them. My kajirae program solved that. Amen. Irlj
Irlj thu9june2022
I am really glad I made the School of Wizardry curriculum and students population history : )
Focusing on one thing at a time…got me into and out of the corps…and to each meal…and through healings…and got my site done much sooner…and my ideas into books…and my Minecraft model built…and so on. I like the idea of having a sexy group of women to come home to, but i know i will like it more if i have that free to focus on After i have felt done with the gaming and site. So i focus on wrapping up my site, which i have been… Idk if the girls will finally behave for once…but at least i can focus on them if they do.
Ten years after the Shift…and things are finally calmed down; no more roadtrips, and my site and model are ready, i am no longer homeless, i discovered the phase1 friends are all idiots and losers so i got rid of their toxicity, and i saw that the flawless irl versions of the characters on tv and in my saga are here… and the humans are fonally being killed by the millions, by themSelves, no less!!; no phase1 fighting/war Needed; an easier purge w more justice, just as i foresaw and hoped for.
Blueho’ won’t load bc my phone company keeps retardedly pointlessly throttling my mobile hotspot speed…and i can’t finish minecraft rn bc the launcher update caused an error…bc of my shitty phone company… and i can’t play EVE bc of that reason… and I can’t get to ushuaia bc the retard humansblocked my path… so i guess i can still edit novels, tan, and exercise… : /
…
Just found out the RoD Discord losers couldnt access their forum or Oasiz, and my Verizon reps said tower upgrades to 5g have been taking weeks and are only at ~41%; it was not just my phone plan, but the 5g rollout causing the superslow internet this past week/month.
Rmbr what the bitch typist and bitch ambi did; instead of acknowledging your obviously good points, she condescended and had tantrums, and instead of asking what was wrong…she/it just ordered/told you to smile, and she didnt show up when you needed her, only after you had broken down and lost all hope/drive; she/it was not there for you, only making a quick pass when you were cutting it off for not being there for you.
After how awfully i was abused by so many in a row, it is perfectly logical to estimate 1) humans will do that to their bitter end, 2) i cannot trust them w relationships Or business until they r enslaved, and 3) isolation is my saving grace and only real medicine until i have the power to enslave all humans.
As much as it worries me, after decades forced to study and work and fight all day, relaxing and eating and napping and orgasming all day…is really good training for phase 3; i won’t have stress about that at All when it comes, only my body / muscle tone…and skin… but that is what tanning, and spells making all hotties lust for me anyway, are for.
I keep hearing the idea/thought: let things slow down, and stabilize… Let your spells/site manifest… and when they do / it does, talk to them… bc they have clearly been intimidated or nervous or waiting for you, and not necessarily bc they r defective or spoiled (though some were). Some tried testing you, only to find They had failed Your test by doing that instd of being polite. Others, however, were wanting you to talk to them, command/direct them, even. It is okay to do so now. It does not make you submitting to them; it makes you their king.
I kept pushing and raging (energy surging) bc i had been trained to have to since my youth, and when seated all day for years, it manifests as yelling etc.; understandable. I also was trained not to bother talking or complimenting, so my nature to be kind like that gets channeled into my spells; normal; understandable.
I was right to “begrudgingly” talk to Carrie Gross; she/it and Eric Wilson were spies, traitors, fakes, and underpaying me, condescending and insulting, vibing blatantly as all those evil things.
No one seems to care about the site, so why keep at it? Hobby. No one bought the book, so why write the rest? No one visited the Minecraft model, so why add to it? Valid… for now. Maybe things are slow and quiet here not as a punishment for you standing up for your values, but because it is the normal flux and lull before the next manifestations. There was a lull after childhood, and after anm, and after the corps, and after each job, and after relationship attempts, and after the travels, so why not now? Big amazing things happen no matter how you are or cuss or anything, so chill and let the next ones come when they will.
I still can hardly get over how uniformly stubborn or cowardly or entitled they all chose to behave… Why be compatible only in body or face? Why exist …only to be worthless loser personality copies? That spurred me, but surely didn’t directly Fuel me; i had to learn to fuel mySelf. Why woukdnt they talk to me? Why show up, only to pus out of the interview? Why all the same way? It wasnt bc i was focused on things other than them, or bc i willed them back away; every time i saw them, i was trying to will them to talk. I only walked by when they Didnt. And many evildoers Did talk to me when i willed them Not to; both the hotties (correctly manifest) and the scum (defective/demons) did the opposite of what i was focused on and willing.
Amazing how much Wild Life calms me down. I even forget my bs ailment/cussing
Giants had bigger brains, thus were smarter and knew how to live longer, and the Earth had no tilt back then, so its polar regions were lush and productive like on the legendary maps. No ice caps meant more accessible water, but it dod not mean higher seas; the water was in the sky as the Firmament. When the Halo rings were fired, it was not to stop The Flood; it was to help it; it reduced humans and dinosaurs to smaller and dumber, their minds no longer holding the same vision of the world, thus its tilt changed, and they turned on each other, infighting, BECOMING THE FLOOD. The ugly humans from Space then came in the 1600s, and you know the rest.
There is no reason to weep or worry or doubt; this is like any other rest interval, and like any other town, and like any other time in your life when isolating and building created genius wonders the world desperately needed/needs. You keep testing, as recently as a couple months ago w the jobhunting, finding the same retarded evil abuse, thus you did your part and all the signs were clear; it is not time to team up yet, so keep chilling and doing your life’s work. You found out last year that ambi and sabrina are real… You found out pele and graciella are real. You get the idea; what you wanted manifested/exists, starting to cross paths w you more and more. Embrace this good time of rewarded rest for your heroism, and to help you recover from the latest human evils.
Irlj revs3 sat11june2022
Irlj just got the idea (sensed?) that maybe Ambi is with future-me…and using her time-abilities to make my saga/spell happen on time as I wrote/wished, thus I should not yet be at Antarctica…bc I am there rn as perfected me…which me-typing-this will soon be…bc she will time-travel w me…as soon as she and I reunite… Wow : ) (and That is why I sometimes felt like maybe there r 2 of me rn, 1 looking more like playby Auz)
Irlj. This postmidnight, I lied in bed with my wife, Ambi, just listening to the light rain pattering on the tree leaves outside our cracked windows. I smiled, realizing I now had everything I ever wanted. Life is now good.
…
That isnt a link to another me; it is happening in the Imagination Dimension; i am bi-location-ing, as it were. I am aligning to the ideal.
Rio, like all Outlanders, was wrong; it isnt that i dont wish to train girls as slaves, only having them; it is that i dont have Time to waste on nongirls who make no effort to learn or be feminine. I developed an entire training Program for good girls, after all; i Love the idea of training THE WORTHY ONES.
That pre-Inisfree ‘dream’ comes to mind…and now seems like the SWAT guys were ICVs in ST suit mode of black/Space appearance…not fastroping, but descending from an MPHA…where the 2 canyons intersect… They never vibed as males or men, but robots; ICVs : )
…
Was it a Grid Mind VR simulation showing a grid scale overlay on blank desert plateau terrain…bc i was designing it w ssp tech…and sharing consciousnesses w that supercomputer prototype back then?
…and did it really get developed while i was in Montana…but in a bunker somewhere else…bc i said it did, thus sensing or manifesting it?
Irlj it keeps occurring to me that the imagination could be a very real and valuable place, thus religtards’ bullying/war to distract, fill, and control it, …and if it IS real, then everything i imagined doing for and with ambi and my other loves…really happened…regardless of how time still flows Here.
Irlj it occurs to me that conscious co creation still works when i use my computers to help me build things…and has included the RPs i allowed, sensing parts of them were okay to further manifest and build on.
All you wanted was the easiest thing in the world; a simple normal hello and name…yet that was too much for all of them. They r not your ppl, and have no manners or bravery or use at all; forget their sorry rude asses and keep moving on. Amen.
All your travels and choices…taught you that even when you talk to them, they r rude dumbasses…and taught Them that if they dont talk to you, you will leave them behind where they belong.
Even if i Was stuck here for a bit, i was stuck n a Lot of lame places, and i keep being a HERO by doing all these amazing things aLONE; this is still worth it, still noble, and still a big next step. The Minecraft model got made here. The Uber Hangars and SRC issues got figured out here.
Maybe u r not stuck in lame ind’; maybe u r here and left undisturbed…bc “they” Do love you and your life’s work; they r giving u quiet and space so u can comPlete your spell. Amen.
Practice not worrying. Rmbr that lfb worried for no reason. You r btr than that. Also rmbr that every time you chased and networked and engaged and pitched…it went nowhere. Also rmbr that you never got ANYthing accomplished when spending time chasing. Also rmbr that you Did give all states and many countries and countless ppl plenty of time and multiple VERY easy chances to talk…and they all ignored you the same way. You did more than anyone ever should have to. Also rmbr that every place you stopped…served corpses and worshipped death and was rude to you. Some even slandered you. Some poisoned you. So stop thinking u would b btr off if you hit on more girls, or cut your hair, or studied harder; you Wouldnt; you earned a freaking MASTERS DEGREE AND MORE; nothing was ever enough for the humans. Let them end themselves. Keep solo. You are a badass. You have been killing this. You are smart. You are healthy. You alone healed yourself. You can do this. It is right. And until ambi and sabrina and rain and all the rest return and explain why they left you hangin, after intercepting you, clearly having spied on you, they are useless cunts, too, no btr than the rest. It isnt about what u r focused on; Rain and Sabrina showed up randomly, as did the rest. That means they Can show up when u r focused on other things. In other words, they could and should have helped u, since they r Not reliant upon u focusing on them. Hotties never showed up when you worked and studied. They showed up and orbited when u let go and did what u r doing now; focusing on You.
irlj revs2
Every single hottie showed up just for me…so i would see they exist…and wanted me…no matter my looks…and was only grumpy bc i had so much to think and write and travel to… The vibe wasnt that they were bait. I worried that…but the vobe was that they were presenting themselves…to me. Me and only me. I bet even taja walked so i would see her perfect legs that one night… I bet sabrina knew i would be at that beach…and spent all day getting ready to show her perfect self off for me. Every hottie walking by and pausing…was her tryout…and her honoring me…while loyally not interrupting my life’s work.
and
I didnt like it at first…but i can hardly beLieve how many ideas, and how much perfect spellwork, ive gotten done since being here. …i guess indiana is alright. Not the ppl, ofc, but me being here once again. The wedding pg aLone; …wow <3 ; SUCH an improvement! The dif btwn phase 2 and 3 is as profound a leap as a lightyear is to a millimeter.
Ambi typist writing other chars w other writers…and writing all her chars w me, makes her polyamorous in both those ways, and it makes her chars poly, even ambi…as ambi has sex w her female servants, her children, etc. All of this is good…bc it means she is like me, understands me, can’t ask me to change, and won’t get clingy or attention seeking. She is the standard hotwife; active w endless options, perfectly balanced and sharing her beauty well. And that means iii never have any reason to feel bad when ii do the saaame.
Lol they talk about losing their freedom. I never had any; i was born into a broken home, forced to evil deathcult events, forced to fake schools, ticket extorted at gunpoint, kept so desperate i resorted to the mil, etc. Their kind deServe to lose their power and freedom after what thet did to me.
Irlj. Thu30dec2021
I worried about napping at 6pm; so late in the afternoon, so early in the evening, sure to throw off my sleep hygiene, but…woke to rp w ambi…during the night hrs i know she is usually up during. Worked out perfectly. Then she said she will reply later, and i worried she was with someone, but 1) so what?, 2) I am poly, too, 3) she always eventually returns, and always with great timing, perfect even, 4) things keep working out better than I expected/dreaded. Amen. I can rest now. Goodnight.
I am glad i am focused on only 1 thing rn. That makes it sooo much easier. Too much $ too soon, and i would be at the site before i had worked out these final details.
Nothing ever Should count as being enough to make up for the hideous bullshit that was done; i am Right to draw this line and spellcraft purge them all. Good riddance! Trust my blood knowledge! Amen.
I am REALLY happy w how all my pgs and ideas and models have turned out : )
They vibe PERfectly.
Interesting how n all these yrs…i only ever had 12ish actual writing partners…and only 1 who stayed.
Hundreds of characters and dozens of forums…and ambi is the one who stayed w me the whole time…at least since i spotted her in Wolfe Castle.
…
I know what i must do; stay alone, complete the writing of my idea/s into the perfect/ed spell, saving a focus on fitness for the next singular-focus (a.k.a. Mayan consciousness focus) for later/next.
Note the default negativity of the story/claim of scientists flown back to an Antarctica base from one of its outposts… being scared and silent about having seen alien blonde hotties working w reptilians out there; they should have been turned on and thrilled.
–
July:
There have been so many great ideas and scale-model additions by this point that I have hardly/barely been able to keep up with them all, even working day and night though I always do. I am very surprised, impressed, and pleased with this. It has resulted in realizations about the whole Inisfree design, and found and fixed some serious issues with more than one of its biggest components.
I hated this U.S. return and waypoint / regrouping area for months, but the latest place has, also for months, proved quiet and beneficial –even for my diet; I have had no distractions here, and have learned how to cook more vegan things –which turned out delicious and became new favorites. I regard this latest spot as my own modern shire; the locals are simple, there are farms almost everywhere, and it is more than a hundred miles to nearest areas of concern/trouble. I don’t ever want to be here again, of course (as the locals are not at all compatible), but I am grateful that it worked out as well as things can in Phase 2.
I keep daydreaming and actual-dreaming about my beloved, real Ambi, and I keep every Sunday reserved for thoughts of spending it with them in our destined family cabin back in Montana. This feels right, even though I don’t yet have any idea how I will find her/them right now; at least I can be with them in spirit / in the Imagination Dimension. Surely, because of my love for them, we will be a real family in this plane one day soon, and forever.
Many of my ‘characters’ showed themselves to be real, and stepped away. I do not think it was as bait, tests, or the general-masses’ rudeness; they all vibed as interested, hopeful, and polite, classy as can be. I keep getting the feeling/idea that they were there just to make sure I knew that good things/forms do exist in/on this world/plane, and that I have good/great reason/s to keep going. I think they somehow were bound not to interfere/interrupt my life’s work, as I, it turns out, still had so many ideas and updates to receive and complete this year.
In spite of what is said about the EM interference from the primitive power stations and powerlines of this civilization (the human outer-surface one), telepathy keeps making it through. I bet it will be so much clearer and effortless once I am back in the deep wildernesses and on to the polar regions; where there is probably no EM interference at all. My senses have grown incredibly since becoming vegan and focused on my truth/mission/essence, so they will probably keep improving, making the communications beyond/above space and time easy even while I am still here (amongst the EM devices/towers). Maybe it is all a good thing, too, I consider; it might help fuzz/block out thoughts and feelings of others which, like their presence too soon, would distract me, thus (potentially) stalling this great work of mine, so very nearly complete.
I look forward to when their unity/reunions with me will benefit that great work; isolation is only called for in the interim; the transition; Phase 2; the presence of those I dreamed about and wrote of during this special and necessary time… are, of course, key to making the whole thing work / ‘light up’… once their places/commands/spells are set and understood.
I’ve continued ignoring and blocking all the inappropriate humans as they reveal their misused numbers and profiles, their godawful vibes and mindless-mindsets all uniform, never good, very apparent. I am so amazed by myself at how I, for decades, kept trying to work with their stupid kind, betrayal after betrayal, rudeness after rudeness, cost after cost; I really was heroic and resilient, even as a child and young man. I went from trying to work For them… to being willing to work With them (and always having the option of walking away whenever they yet again misbehaved)… and will, very soon and forevermore, have gotten myself, via all this isolation and life’s work, into a (the best) position to always have Them finally behaving, They always striving to earn the chance to work for Me. Amen. It is coming soon.
…
–
August:
So many phase3 signs:
- Every time I nearly filled my computer, it stabilized at 300 GB.
- 3 homes; ICGM, fam cabin, and lingering IRL waypoint
- 3 bands; 1 gone, VR2, VR3, and maybe my quartets/quintets w my 4 children from Ambi is the new 3rd
- 3 modes of travel; MPHA, AF1, portals (ICVs –or hotwives with that ability)
- 3 lion spots; icgm porte-cochere, L.A.A., hwy sphinx
- 3 domes; solarium(s), Auz-dome (dome of domes; Ceiling Mansions), skydome
- 3 lesser spheres; hanging mansions, Cloud City II, Inisfree
- 3 greater spheres; MSBSs, PSBSs, SSBS
- 3 female castes; hotwives (including ICVs), fuckbuddies (including daughters), kajirae
- 3 main demographics; Inisfreeans, allies, Outlanders
- 3 dimensions; waking (which includes Heaven in the stars), dreamspace (which may be part of Imagination Space), SSA
- 3 timespans per day; Ambi/fam/night, Inisfree/work mornings, play/expedition afternoons
- 3 great trees; Kapok Helix, Uber Baobab
- 3 great tree-stumps; Mt Auzmore, Devils Tower II, Slant-top
- 3 great rings; Sotu perim, Avalanche Wall, Perimeter Ring(s)
- 3 crops areas; farmland, silos, gardens
- 3 pyramids sites; Cut, Highway, White (or does Cut not count, and Luxor II does?)
- 3 volcanoes; Mt Dante, Faux (by Slant-top?), Hwy
- 3 pits; Inverted, FAU, Under-concavity
- 3 caves; Uber Geode, Underway
- 3 great-hangar types; Main Womb, WSs/Uber Hangars, single-WS hangars
- 3 school buildings; LHS, LAA, TNA
- 3 bodies-of-water types; ponds, lakes, sea-tanks
- 3 mass-transit types; bus, trollie, subway
- 3 vehicles factories; city, military, personal
- 3 remaining/eternal campaigns; 1) boot “the beast” (humans) and keep it (them) in The Abyss, 2) realign the cosmic bodies (partially by asking/inviting them, as they are conscious Valar), and 3) Inisfree’s relocations expeditions
- 3 logo loops; the 3 pointed petals of the triquetra
- 3 main games in development/use; MC/Creativerse, EVE (and Path of Lust; the sexualization of Space), SexCraft (using WL tech’)
- 3 main kitchens; main, nook, fam cabin
- 3 ICVs factories
- 3 tree-castles
- 3 glampsite sizes
- 3 physical libraries; LHS, Congress II, ICGM
- 3 desks; WGI, ICGM, fam cabin
- Ambi inviting 1 girl at a time to sleep with us on/above our bed
- Ambi sending 2 girls at a time to me to destress, always resulting in a 3some when counting me; Blaire and Caitlyn, Ariel and Faith, Nevaeh and Clary, Izzy and Melissa, the 2 unnamed full-use slaves, etc.
- 3 females in my Ambi fam; her + daughters
- 3 males in my Ambi fam; me + sons
- 3 manmade craters; FAU, Crater Lake, Tornado Crater (and does Inisfree’s count?)
- 3 cliffdwellings
- 3 castle types/neighborhoods
- 3 single/distinct mansions; Asian, Spanish, ICGM
- 3 great walls; perim, sotu perim, aval
- 3 Asian architecture bases; gate, ryokan, mansion
- 3 great tubes; hwy tube, sotu perim, stasis archives
- 3 great-blossom types; Flower Tower, Awesome Blossom, _
- 3 magic areas; Hgwts, Magics Chambers
- 3 main floors of ICGM
3 basements beneath ICGM
3 yard types of ICGM; front, back, sides/pools
3 ICGM perim-yards; for Kings Dr, for Slanted Bkyd, and for the Husky+Shanty - 3 mil vehicle types; tank, WH, WR
- 3 mil aircraft types; AP, FJ, MPHA
- 3 battlemech types; MD, BM, Trumpeter
- 3 city-services craft/transports; hover-shuttles, police-Tumblers, fire-tanks
- 3 acclimation steps; scouting/prescreening, tour, wingsuiting
- 3 memories/bkups; pc, thumb, portable
- 3 ways of publishing; site, novels, pitching
- 3 Mayan calendar parts shown to me
- 3 calendars; Gregorian/Outlander, Mayan/Atlantean, Inisfreean/Omni
- 3-part stimuls/release; me always instinctively pairing a song w a pic and a vid/gif for ss
- 3 main website sections/tabs; home/exped, city, writing
- 3 first angels; divinity, eleanor, aya (and Angelike makes 4)
- 3 first werepanthers; freya, bela, gigi
- 3 first werewolves, elena, blaire, caitlyn (who walled by w Blaire in Zion)
- 3 first mermaids; sirena, mara, mira? (and the 3 or so who solo-walked by me on the cruise, or singing by my door)
- 3 GC hotties; Sylvanas, Rain, ride-by aviators
3 pre-GC hotties; hotel desk, hotel bus walkaround, etc. - 3 first nymphs; lillian, melina, charlotte
- 3 first witches; freyja (who also appeared in mt), nevaeh (who appeared in la), sabrina (who appeared, w 2 others (3 total), in ca)
- 3 first kajirae; sarah, clary, valora
- 3 certain/obvious ambi approaches; MT suburban, AZ motel, CA staircase
- My next move to MT making it the 3rd time I will live there. (1st was w the scum, 2nd was solo)
- My next trip to s.amer. will be my 3rd.
- My next contact/interaction w ambi will be the 3rd, thus the/our forever one <3 (i.e. we start that cabin and our family together, and stay happily together forever, amen)
- and, ofc, my instinct since puberty to always have 3somes, never anything less
…and what, then, to make of the non-3s; the 2s (irl vehicles rn, irl cards rn, aerospaceports, ICGM helipads, ICGM waterslides, etc.), 5s (Auzdome ports, Rooftop Carriers, ICGM theaters, cliffs (cw1’s, cw2’s, cw3’s, stepway’s, main canyon’s), ICVs per fire-team, ICV subordinate-units in each parent-unit, etc.), 10s (Sotu ports, Flower Towers, etc.), 12s (Huskies, etc.), 20s (perim-wall ports, etc.), 27s (ICGM rectangular-prism sections, etc.), 35s (MSBS hangars), 50s/51s (clubs, etc.), 1,000s (form-sakes, Shrine-mansions, Ceiling Mansions, ~skyscrapers, etc.), etc.?
It seems the majority is a 3base, …and that I was not able/allowed to go to Antarc yet…bc it is for Inisfree; it must always/only be good, not mixed/meh.
…
The Halos were designed to reduce all life so that it was too small and stupid to be attractive to The Flood, thereby starving and eventually stopping The Flood.
Something similar happened when the Firmaments around some worlds were lowered/felled;
when the protective thick atmospheres were dropped, causing flooding on the outer surfaces, it exposed those once-shielded surfaces, no longer protected by cycled water the same way nuclear reactor cores are protected, to the energies of the stars,
and those energies are coming out of nexuses where multiple god-thoughts/wills overlap in the singularity that is their shared core.
What does that mean for finite and much smaller beings? Obviously it overloads them, and we see the evidence and symptoms of that today with how differently outer-surface humans think, and how often they disagree and fight their own kind, sometimes becoming so overloaded that they are not only erratic and rude, but thoughtless, some of their minds even becoming vestigial, unrecoverable.
If they breed enough during these conditions / this post-Firmament exposure, it causes a “generational curse”; generations become mindlessly perpetuating, breeding sooner/younger, making it impossible to think of anything but more breeding… as generation after generation almost immediately start to die out, no longer able to figure out / understand why.
The only way to fix that, i.e. break the ‘curse’, is to stop breeding, focusing on one’s self, until enough others have/are… that the answers/causes start to become known again, …and additional cures/solutions applied.
Eventually, with enough self-stabilizing/control like that, the individuals right their respective bodies, at which point their minds become powerful enough to re-harmonize, at which point their synergy starts to restore things such as their world’s Firmament.
Once the Firmament goes back up, the overlapping ideas of/from the stars… can no longer overload/confuse the still weaker-minded, thus the fighting and non-veganism fades away, which gives the rest/weakest time to stabilize, recover, and reawaken/’ascend’ (instead of spending all their time evading, defending, countering, worrying, reacting, etc.).
Only ‘dark forces’ (bad people/beings; children/spawns/nodes/NPCs of whatever being or beings want more of those horrible, painful, deadly times and loops… would ever pressure people to adopt religions instead of having their own spiritual experiences, or to breed instead of self-stabilizing; only Chaos Incarnate would encourage or try and force people to continue being chaotic (such as occurs from most premature reproduction).
Every time someone breeds with an incompatible partner, the result is conflicted blood/offspring/family, thus tension, thus stress, thus disease (which comes from mindset/stress/incompatibility, not made-up germs).
This is the way bad humans kept other beings on Earth and some other worlds under control and dependent for so long; they kept them so burdened, distracted, and exhausted from starting and financing premature/incompatible families… that it was impossible for them to have any quiet, healing, or thoughts/ideas/realizations of their own.
One of the only places shielded from the centuries/millennia of post-Firmament overload/conflict/surface-Hell was the portion below the oceans and lands; shielded the same way nuclear reactor cores are, life underwater never become so conflicted, and life in the hard/thick planetary-crust was even more-protected, …but the water and land also disperse and block some signals, such as primitive (linear/direct/proximity) telepathy, so there was still a significant degree of separation, confusion, and so on.
The Firmament has to be up, shielding open air, for normal/basic telepathy to work, and for outer-surface beings to maintain their unity and shared singular vision.
They also have to not reproduce the way humans do; they have to naturally individually desire to maintain their own bodies, and reproduce only when it makes sense to, i.e. when it can never distract or weaken them.
Another interesting thing is that when the star inside each planet wills it, it can condense the layer around it that is the planetary-crust, and when that layer is condensed, it causes gravity, which pulls down the atmosphere; this is how a gas-giant can turn itself into a terrestrial world.
The reverse can also be done; the star can will that crust to uncontract/unpetrify, which reduces gravity, helping its Firmament to rise back up and stabilize.
Anyway, because of this, the stars are like the Halo installation, but they are always on, never having to be fired, and the equivalent of the Halo-series’ shield-worlds are the hollow worlds (which may be ALL worlds); good beings can retreat into them, shielding themselves from the overload/chaos.
The bad/Chaos beings/people can TRY to get into the hollow interior of a world, but the light from the star (Arch Angel) in each hollow world would overload them.
This is a curious thing/balance; too much exposure to a star can cause overload/chaos, but the stars are preventing Chaos Incarnate / Darkness Incarnate.
What works has long/always been protecting individual bodies/people from too much light and too much darkness… by having a crust-firmament between the closest star (Arch Angel) and them, …and a sky-firmament between them and The Abyss; total darkness/emptiness; Outer Space.
Too much light = too many ideas for single bodies/humans to process/withstand, and too much darkness = no idea at all, thus atrophy and explosion/oblivion.
Only when a steady indefinite twilight is produced/provided/maintained by a firmament… does just the right amount of light (i.e. a single idea from the shared-core / nexus / Source / God/s)… make it through;
for the people on each planet to be stable via having only one vision/idea they all share and are guided by, there can be only a certain type/amount of light.
At all other times, no matter what modern Outlanders were told about the Moon and tides and cycles, there is a mental tug-of-war which keeps them yanked back and forth in terms of vision/s, morality, and perceived situation/needs.
To stop these “Halo equivalents” (the stars) from “firing”, individuals must choose to shift their consciousness/focus away from endless default breeding… and instead to restoring their health/immortality/godhood and unity.
For that, someone has to sense and choose/decide what the vision they will all hold shall be.
I have done that.
Amen.
I have not only stabilized myself in spite of so many of them relentlessly trying to DEstabilize me, and not only chosen the vision for THIS world I am on, but I have ALSO chosen what is inside all STARS, and how stars now THINK, and that ALL of them (the stars; the Arch Angels) shall hold the SAME vision; of aligning ALL minds and (solar) systems, no longer letting all of them be DIFFERENT.
Thus the stars shall remain bright, but not from overlapping/conflicting ideas (even though they still will, technically, each be holding the idea of their different/respective solar-systems).
What results from this? People still exposed to their light (i.e. not shielded by a firmament) will no longer be conflicted… even though the different solar systems will have different planets orbiting in different ways.
–
September:
There is not a single reason they couldn’t have defaulted to positive (thus appropriate and honest/accurate) every time;
- “You picked a wonderful gf!”,
- “You stood up to your abusive relatives!”,
- “We will watch your mother and protect your clearly logical relationship.”,
- “Your muscle definition will soon show more, and we’ll help you build it.”,
- “What a great ASVAB score! You clearly studied hard and put your best foot forward. We are lucky you are in our unit.”,
- “You must be protected by the gods.”,
- “What?!”; that Iraqi-outpost fuck-bag should have become enraged that someone had enraged/harmed Me, not enraged that Iii was hurt thus/and naturally enraged. His very first question and demand should have been at that piece-of-shit substandard jarhead who pranked/assaulted me.
- “You have a manly nose with character.”,
- “We are going to pay you more than the norm, as you are clearly deserving of it.”,
- “We won’t charge you for anything; you have already done so many years of charity.”,
- “Your orientation is exemplary and a light for us all; you are so loving and balanced.”,
- “The elders will look to you for the better way.”,
- “You picked a great dog that suits you well.”,
- “Your speed is amazing! Keep me posted on your whirlwind traveling.”,
- “I am flattered that you like my girl. Let me go prepare her for you to share love with.”,
- “We clearly strayed from right, so you are now our religious leader.”,
- “You can and should do whatever you want; you clearly know what is appropriate and prudent.”,
- “Don’t worry; we will make that easy correction in our computers of the dealership’s error.”,
- “I am so turned on by your nature and flawless logic. You are so real and aware. What would you like me to do for you?”,
- “I am the most beautiful girl in this town, so I would be honored to introduce myself to you.”,
- “We love that you fuck our daughter. She is so happy now. You have clearly been treating her VERY well. Would you like to fuck more of our females? We care about how they and you feel, and know you all will make each other very happy like you did with our first you interacted with.”
- “You have chosen to abstain on this expedition, so we respect your wise decision and impressive self-discipline, and will never pester or harass you about changing your decision.”
- “Thank you for initiating all those times, saving so many the trouble, and thank you for your self control when so many responded so rudely, and thank you for then switching to waiting on others to decide if they would initiate. You obviously are very polite and patient.”
- Even if everyone had been correct and kind to me, I still would have studied and done my life’s work. I still would have sampled and explored. I still would have isolated when necessary to meditate to receive all these ideas from myself.
- All those fools’ negativity didn’t spur me onward; it forced me to abandon focus and resort to desperate survival tactics over and over.
…
–
October:
Phase1: i begged gods who did nothing or werent real. Phase2: i did everything for mySelf. Phase3: my favorite sexy real goddesses show up and help me with Everything i want. Amen.
So much i did this year…required all my time, and total focus, and random rest; it would have been imposible w Any of my loves already here. But now my work is wrapped up, and i want them with me forever.
I want her real pic in my phone. I want her real phone number. I want all of the real pics and phone numbers of those hotties I loved the sight of. They should now return. They are. Amen.
Maybe I don’t need to love my body; maybe that is what They are for. If I loved my own body, maybe I wouldn’t be as attracted to theirs.
It feels like I finally made it through the “pipe”; the challenging, “uncertain”, crawl-like time/s. I finally feel like my design is complete. It also keeps occurring to me that others manifested shitty Antarctic conditions bc they only set out to see what was already there; I was destined to have the Inisfree experience there, evident in how all trips w those not holding this vision… did not launch. When I go, it wilp be to completed Inisfree, amen.
And just like that, I had made it through all my song folders and irlj notes. Wow
That website is phase3; phase1 was Humans dictating evil bs to Me. Phase2 was me setting up filters such as the internet forums. Phase3 is how i have been making, and shall always make from here on, one-way communications with no chance for humans to lie or he rude ever again.
I was right to trust my senses about the Corps; when to try it and when to leave. I was right to try and leave so many others, too; trying got me to the carrier, japan, peru, israel, and more. Leaving got my health and respect back. It would have been madness/retardation to accept the bitches giving me the same one sign every time; that of being rude, primitive, and demonic. And even if there Hadn’t been those obvious signs and instincts, every bitch was rude, insane, and criminally against me; they made it clear in every way that they are only good as fodder and slaves. Only when they do what i like, and Are what i like, is it right to have sex w them –and only when i have total control of them, the law, and any spawns that may occur. I shall have control even over whether they Can conceive…b4 i fuck any of them again. Amen.
It occurs to me 1) ambi may default to villain mode not necessary/fully out of boredom, but bc she has never been treated like, or called, anything better. And 2) hotties probably cause drama and do evil… not just to test males for strength, but (also?) bc their instincts and experience show them only that keeps most stalkers away.
mon24oct
Seeing an appropriate-height blonde girl, and a fit man, though she was meh face, he was top tall, and everyone else was hideous, was still a positive surprise.
I didnt think they Had any shorties or fit ppl here.
Groc app is rd 2…and this time…i didnt wear gaytarded dress shirt clothes…and she said i gave the best answer…and i had YEARS to adjust to groc store work…and MONTHS of getting used to seeing the hideous creatures there (as opposed to mere Moments at GGD and Other hells), …so i feel ready to handle this latest training via more demons exposure. Also, she offered Produce instd of stocking –which is perfect bc i am vegan
The tanning lady was hotter this time; meh teens first, then barf fat gut fug ogre wench, then decent short tan face protoss eyes who knew Exactly how many minutes not to fry me.
How convenient that all my neighbors atm are disgusting druggie scum; i can vent and cuss and do anything i want, and the more distanced they get from that… the better.
“Some things you can only do with a clan.” Punk. Exactly. That is why I have been rejecting all the losers who are of the retarded deathcult clan, and waiting for My clan. To accept any phase2 scum would be to delay the arrival of my phase3 soultribe ppl.
Is there any point to the Creativerse? Not really. It just passes some time. I guess that is a good enough point/purpose for phase2, though.
I was hoping for just a piss test, not the swab i learned can be harmful, and got better than Both; No drug test! …This definitely is nearly the end of phase2.
…
I worried about 1 bad posb,
aimed for 1 tolerable/meh,
and got 1 ideal in spite of my 2 thoughts…
This is always phase3; good occurring no matter what.
When PERFECT occurs no matter what, then it will finally be phase3.
If doc and the celestine had been Actual ascended/wise/guides/help, they would never have oneway told Me what signs are; they would have Asked me how to interpret the signs iii keep giving.
The Final folder is being cleared out. Wow… I really did it; I processed ALL I found and was given. There is nothing else to include. Inisfree is complete. Amen.
It keeps occurring to me that my kids y ICVs will be the ones getting to play my Minecraft and Creativerse worlds w me.
Remember how they lied about me;
I cried and asked for them to explain what was going on, and instead they screamed in my ears.
I called for help, and they lied about me in court.
I begged for healthcare, and they poisoned me.
I gave my dog a common name, and they whispered about it and then tried to bully me into giving it away.
I gave a highfive to a farm friend I had helped babysit, and the psycho liar father immediately called someone and said, “He already touched her!”, pretending I was a pedophile. I can’t stand kids, so I certainly can’t be attracted to them.
No matter how good I was or how devoted I was to seeking input, they did the absolute worst and most evil possible things they could to me… every time,
…and they keep insanely asking why I don’t bother talking to their evil kind anymore…
even though it was They who always refused to talk, while I kept trying to.
Remember.
I have not yet been able to defeat their evil species, but at least I Have been able to avoid them for longer and longer periods of time. Thankfully their dumbasses have also been wiping themselves out… while I grow even smarter, freer, and stronger.
For now, it has been enough of a victory for me that I sensed and evaded All their many attempts to stop my sacred work.
I feel SOOOOOOO much better now that my Instagram is updated lol;
I just didn’t like those pics of the Mexico hell-expedition always being the ones at the top of my page/album.
Now there are dozens more from my expeditions since.
At last.
Many/countless more to come, amen.
If Beastly was an honest nonCIA-psyop movie, it would be the Guy cursing the Girls for being so rude and wrong, and the Girls then having to find people to love them in spite of Their changed exteriors. Wmkm studios is now making Beastly 2, precisely with that plot. Amen.
What a gorgeous creepy cozy soothing picturesque crescent moon yellow colored and behind a circle glow atmo haze cloud mist effect this almost Halloween! <3
fri28oct2022
No ambi again…but an ada-like daughter n pajamas n front of me, and they got candles which this haunted house gave to those who don’t want to be scared, which was nice for me bc it allowed me to walk through without asking for a candle, and a shooting star when i got outside gave me another wish for ambi to be good and w me in the yc
…
Note the signs; you have started going out and interacting again, the gigantic haunted areas of childhood are now small ones here with options to not be scared, and you wrote another instinctive spell to make this time of year no longer negative and bizarre…but good. Amen.
lol; more phase2 sure signs: 2nd time making the Firefly, and I end up making 2
I used to think RP was pointless, but it perfected my vision/spells, and started manifesting flawless hotties.
I used to think Minecraft was pointless, but then I had all of Inisfree perfected in it.
I used to think Creativerse was pointless, but then I had Firefly “Persephone” perfected in it.
What else do I currently/still worry may be pointless, but which will work perfection-wonders for me?
Like the jobs that come and go, so did the hotties and locations/trips, …and the money/pay;
ALL things apparently only had the ability to appear briefly back then.
At least it was better than phase1; when all things were banned and preVENted.
In time, I having held the vision and stopped all evil visions/attempts/underminings/rudeness, the things I love… are bound to return to me, empowered at that soon-coming point to stay with me forever in perfect harmony with me, amen.
My blood/instincts tell me to be away from those who are incompatible.
It would be a bad sign if I DIDN’T embrace my nature; my honest emotions/reactions/feelings;
it would be BAD if I chose to CHASE and TOLERATE, rather than stand firm as the real King of Kings, tolerating NOTHING short of pure goodness/compatibility with me.
Amen.
As much as I hate and can’t stand to be around the awful retarded choices/decisions/behavior of SF, AEP, and the others,
those bad lifepaths of theirs still have a good side; they are incontrovertible evidence I am the smart one, the king of kings, and they are all lesser in many ways.
Their horrible choices and non-thinking (mindless regurgitation/repeating of things that don’t vibe or have evidence at all) keeps them weak, and me strong/healthiest.
Telling ppl Space is full of harmful/lethal radiation…
was a spell trick that gets most to cause that,
since Space is actually full of nothing, thus manifests without resistance whatever your assumptions/focuses are;
telling ppl Space is harmful… is a way of tricking them into staying put on the outside of the Dyson Spheres that are the planets,
i.e. in the literal ‘circles’ of hell/Abyss.
Their whole system was about lying to and about me,
in order to get/force/trick me into chasing things;
chasing relig/”gods”/standards,
chasing grades,
chasing money,
chasing girls,
etc.,
and when I learned to sense/see that and disregard ALL of them/it,
the whole “WORLD” (civilization) of theirs got shut down XD lmfao.
(in reference to the SF girl-hold event I wisely instinctively left right on time)
Note what happened;
they spent their ENTIRE LIVES forcing THEIR will on YOU,
assaulting you, threatening you, insulting you,
yet when YOU tried putting YOUR will on THEM,
THEY showed up with GUNS to FURTHER force YOU;
THEY were the rapists/forcers, not you,
and they are so addicted to it…
that they DEMONIZED/SHAMED YOU for doing what THEY do.
That’s as hypocritical, blind, and retarded as it gets.
That is the worst double-standard of all.
So I now cast them ALL out.
SO BE IT. Amen.
I asked for what I wanted and needed and deserved, and was not given it; that was a sign of where I was in the phases/progression/schedule.
I asked for pretty girls, but they were deformed, and they hid their beauty, thus I could not confirm it, thus I was not given beauty, but cowardice.
I asked for them to be engaging, but they were not.
I asked for them to be loving and touch-based, but they were not.
I asked for compatibility, but was not given it.
I asked for good trips, but did not get them.
Strange that I WAS given access to THOUSANDS of cities/lands/realms, but not what I REALLY wanted.
I guess access was enough for then, and only one wish/breakthrough/evolution/advancement could manifest at a time, at least back then.
So those were all uniform signs of the same one thing; manifestations were not happening correctly back then,
and something was working against me.
I note, however / of course, that all those failures of them / those “no”s… consistently resulted in my life’s work getting better; my vision taking better shape, as nothing else distracted from it.
Perhaps all of those hotties… wanted my visio to grow… so that THEY and their KIND could improve/grow for me, too.
note all the phase1 signs of the typist;
unhealthy,
rude,
defaulting to neg about my good nature/things and even when i was honest w her/it.
if she/it had been at least phase2 neutral, she wouldn’t have reacted negatively to ANYthing.
if she/it had been phase3 (i.e. realAmbi; the perfect good/match/wife for Me), she/it would have LIKED my manners, and already KNOWN the wisdom i was sharing, and THANKed me for writing only about happy family stuff to manifest that,
and been HONEST and GRATEFUL about how i DID write about MUCH more than just sex,
and would NEVER have talked shit about “just sex” (i.e. the greatest (most wholebodied/complete) love/union/family of all).
She would have been HONEST when saying i am her god.
She would have been HONEST when saying “there is no love like our love” (but she/it revealed she really had no love like that of the TV lies and other lies; she loved the brainwashing/liars/scammers most).
etc.
It was a phase2 thing that I only had to deal with her through the internet/discord filter;
it was good that she was kept away from me,
NOT getting to meet me,
for she wasn’t ready; she was unworthy in many ways.
and it is a phase3 thing that i SEE this good now.
(also, she would have been VERY glad I loved all her characters, and defaulted NOT to phase1 stuff (TORTURING them for being GOOD/LOVING), but to praising and conGRATULATING them –and ME –and herSELF for being such a successful multiple-time MATCHmaker with/for me)
…
phase1 bad was “there’s more to life than sex”.
phase2 neutral would have been her just going along with anything I said/did/wanted, and doing what I ask.
phase3 good/correct/mature will be when she (and the rest of my wives and girlfriends and fuckbuddies and slaves/kajirae) are POSITIVE, such as by saying “I love how sexual/active you are! <3 ”
even prayer, as innocent as they make it out to SEEM (with propaganda/lies/idiocy), still boils down to this:
it is just more brainwashing/repetition/training to be weak, to beg, to grovel, to NOT manifest anything, and to “roll the dice” on all things; it is to and for chaos.
even asking that a meal be “blessed to the nourishment of our bodies and the enrichment of our souls” boils down to:
1) asking, instead of the GOOD/STABLE/SUSTAINABLE action; DECIDING/CHOOSING/TELLING/COMMANDING/WILLING,
2) assumes the bodies won’t nourish themselves,
3) assumes the nutrients won’t do their jobs,
4) assumes/causes the fragmenting of the self into 2 parts/sides; body and “soul”, as if they were separate.
The fact dan (another idiot dan shittalker like dan malik) thought it made sense to tell me to only “move frwd” shows 1) he is too stupid and/or evil to see i always have, 2) he is too stupid/evil to default to the obvious good in all i do, 3) he is so stupid/evil that he pretends my plan/actions/path isnt/arent progressive/”forward-moving”. Wiping out the enemies IS moving frwd. They have interfered w forward mvmt this whole time. No more.
I never thought i’d end up showing my screenshots to anyone, but i emailed some, used many for reference and revision, and finally organized, cropped, and uploaded them to Many of my thousands of webpages. Milestones. Progress comes in a cycle of lulls/buildups and waves.
Others having their minds focused on other and conflicting things…sucked…but worked like gym weights, resulting in My mind getting so good at holding cosmic-level perfect visions on my own…that any help at All will make it ‘a breeze’ to manifest.
The fact that they treated you like shit thousands of times for decades, shaming and insulting and threatening you every time you interacted at All, and then didnt understand why you stopped interacting, says it all; humans are as stupid, evil, and useless -worthless and shameful- as it gets. There can be no way to redeem them after all that abuse and all the murders they commit. All worlds are better without them.
After the tidal waves of perfect ideas and progress, i am finally glad and relieved the hotties have not yet come and united w me; it has taken every waking moment for me just to keep up, and i haven’t even had time for me/exercise. I haven’t even had time to work. Sometimes i haven’t even slept whole nights. Wow.
It isnt that i grew up mostly w women; i grew up mostly w monsters, not females at all. It isnt that the mil got me used to living fast; they always slowed me down and tried to stop my movements entirely. The reason i want to live at my pace is bc it has Always been my pace, working for me. The reason i want to marry many women is bc my instincts tell me to –the same instincts which revealed all enemies and truths, and which got me out of countless scams and traps.
Noah was never supposed to save any; he went against god’s will by saving himself and the animals. He lied by claiming any god told him to. The world got repopulated by monsters (dumb violent animals; nonvegan humans, etc.) bc of his crime.
10+ yrs of that heartless bitch not showing up, and then she expects me to be happy and trusting and initiating? She never even gave me a headsup, or her contact info like i did, or even a hint she was real. No one was trustworthy for decades, and she acted just as suspicious as the rest of them. Maybe i really should just nuke her realm.
The morrigan triple-goddess; her 3 forms; young, middleaged, and old; maiden, mother, crone;
Ambi…started w gross evil crone, then hottie irl… and next daughters is maiden x2; she is getting younger and more numerous. 1 bad at first, then 2; typist meh plus irl hottie whose behavior and common sense were severely lacking, then 3; irl hottie with our 2 daughters, all 3 of whom shall be and behave exactly how i always want, amen.
*also, the crone/typist idiot was the one who talked shit about sex/love and uniting w others –bc she/it was the one who could never do such; real-Ambi shall always love the sex and relationships i have, amen.
I defaulted to kindness, positivity, honesty, heroism, and so on. They defaulted to the most baseless and extreme negative bs and insecurities ever. Thus i can only wait for when ppl finally come into my life…defaulting to seeing the positive in all iii do.
It is very amusing how the xian tards here revealed their own scam, blocked me from only a job i didnt want, and showed me they have nothing to offer; fugs temple, roach infested failtown, etc.
The Celestine book was standard backward xian lies; i was never meant to seek signs and team up; i Was and Am the sign and balance and god, and it is the Humans who must learn to seek and obey Me.
Thomas effeny was another phase1 demontard; only a retarded demon punk would say “i dont think i could live on so much hate” when the truth was that i live on love, and admirably/sacredly only and always auto reject those who are evil and disgusting. I had very little hate, only hating that which deserved hate. Only a complete pussy and fool and loser would demonize a useful emotion and natural response, too. Only a demon fool would be negative about anything good and wise i was doing. If he had been good, he would have genuinely complimented me and been impressed. He wpuld have thanked me. Curious how even the newer ones (appearing younger than me) were still just as corrupted/evil as the older-looking (more self-atrophied) demons. A good and correct being would have defaulted to seeing my overwhelming good and love, and been blown away by how calm and successful and devoted and overcoming i had remained in spite of all Their hate put upon Me. It was tom effeny who hated Me. It was He who was living on so much hate. My entire life was based on being loving and only accepting love. My entire city is about love. In the military, i was the loving one. I always left places which were hateful, not loving. My site and record make that very easy to see. Only a complete liar, disgrace, and shit talker with zero honor and zero brains would claim otherwise.
Just as my angel name sigil info said, i have been restoring rights and honors; only good/angels do that, not demons. Only a demonic/evil/liar/retarded site would claim a bad being would do such good, or that such good is bad in any way.
–
November:
mon7nov
another shit job, but i go where the money is, and where help is wanted;
can’t teach/make these idiot humanimals want what i’m great at,
so i’ll just make ends meet again. whatever. fuckit.
I no longer feel bad for “missing opportunities”;
I realize that, by the same correct thinking/logic that confirms “If they all showed up at once, you wouldn’t have had time to appreciate / get to know them one by one; you would have been overloaded/overwhelmed.”,
there is also the correct logic: “If you had tried to interact with them, especially after 100% of THOUSANDS of them behaved the same one awful/stalling way, you never would have had time to get to know all YOUR individual thoughts/ideas/vision-parts.”
IOW: I chose to give each of my OWN instincts, thoughts, and projects time, so as not to be overwhelmed by the OTHERS (humans/people, etc.).
Even if they ALL had behaved appropriately, I still would have been too busy to really quality-interact with any of them –until now.
All those flawless hotties answered/appeared even when i had no money and didn’t even know requesting them worked that way; imagine how much more often they will show up, and how much longer they will stay w me each visit, now that i Do know those things and Have caught up w my life’s work! Amen!
Waking up to only the warm bed and the sound of the cool breeze is heavenly
I wanted to start making money earlier than Wed…and it happened without me even asking; got Mon offer. It’s still phase2, but alright
My instincts told me to try many girls, then to stop after they all behaved so insanely and evilly.
It was, of course, also experience and numbers telling me to stop wasting time on their evil asses, but definitely also instincts.
Now my instincts tell me not only to stay stopped/isolated from all that/their bs, but also that:
I just what to be w ppl I am attracted to, who are attracted to me. I deserve that; to be w my kind, what/who I have always wanted, loved, and instinctively known are the only ones right for me and truly appropriate.
IOW: Transitioning away from the incompatible/bad is complete, and now is the time of transitioning into being w only those I have always truly loved; those whose vibes make me feel calm and perfectly right.
Also: being around flawless hotties doesnt petrify men; feeling tense/’frozen’ only comes from misbehaving/creepy females/anyone. Flawless females, who are not just outwardly beautiful, are those who are also flawless at treating me the way I want to be treated –and this includes them not walking on by just because I maturely masculinely dominated and waited for Them to be feminine by accepting all I am and initiating for me.
It occurs to me that realAmbi had the bad vibe of even lfb (pure evil) and Lcpl Brown (cocky/cunty moron radiating bad vibe), and that obviously could never be allowed to pass. She’ll have to be far better when she returns.
Fighting the red ghosts in Creativerse restored my memory of the first time I fought them; the last time i was in this aptmt bldg. I kept losing the fights, not getting any loot, cussing, and hating the game. I had no Creative mode bk then, and was just guessing and tossing bombs. This time, I practically danced and farmed through the red guys, fighting them not a few times, but hundreds. I have a spaceport and hundreds of teleporters, too. I have creative mode and full stacks of all blocks. I tamed ghosts. I am even starting the Persephone build. My how things have dramatically improved.
Firefly Persephone is almost complete on day1!!
I found 2 great vegan frozen pizzas!
doesn’t matter if the typist just said what she/it knew i’d hate… to get me to break contact w her… bc i hadn’t engaged when real-ambi showed up a few times;
what matters is:
1) she never really helped,
2) she made me wait a DECADE or MORE –and without good reason,
3) I would have done all this work either way; whether she was with me or not (so/thus she SHOULD have been with me),
4) she was dead-wrong about drugs, fitness, politics, religion, and more,
5) she/it was condescending, insulting, etc.,
6) she/it repeatedly/consistently demonstrated lack of selfcontrol, lack of respect, lack of effort, lack of education, lack of being informed, lack of admitting fault/wrong, and worse, while also repeatedly displaying severe insecurity, clinginess, lfb-level torture-based/default hyper-controlling OCD, etc.
so…
after getting to know her/it for all those years,
I had every reason to doubt her/it,
and no reason to ever even hope it would listen, admit, improve, learn, get better, or anything good, let alone be wife-material, let alone top-wife or mother-material.
What matters is that SHE made me wait WAY too long, and now I’m glad she/it did; she was a fool from the start, and all the signs were there, and when she showed up… she vibed as an asshole/fool, much like the typist had.
Maybe she paid that fatfuck indy-fail beast to wave at me, pretending it was her.
Doesn’t matter.
Either way, she was wrong and abusive and dumb from the start.
She wasted my time.
The only reason ANY good came of it/her… was because I had a filter, and kept extracting it, and kept tolerating and being compassionate and hoping.
I revealed all. She revealed none.
I made it easy for her to show up. She barely blinked in and out at all.
I loved her. She only loved lies/tv/’games’.
No more; I move on.
How it is.
She brought that on herself.
Limited to games? No; these “games” have solved Tons of problems for you; boredom, stress, architecture issues, etc., and they are a GIANT and WONDROUS leap forward from the bnw drafting table basics decades before. They r practically a Miracle, and Everything you needed to finiah your genius design.
I didnt go too fast or too early; i went at my pace, always made it in and back, and saw what i needed…in order to know how to prepare and return and manifest better.
Shit has always sucked. Doesnt matter, here or elsewhere. This latest job will be annoying but pay some more bills. Just get it done. You can vent about it later. You were bored at the aptmt anyway.
…
Yes, they are idiots and monsters selling rape and murder (“food”), and much is laced w poison, but it is still trng i can extract useful things from, and it still only poisons Them now, and i can always easily walk back away. Amen. Phase2.
Hormones sounds like “whore moans”. Hormonal “whore moan all”
Another sure sign i was/am right: inisfree’s vtol shafts, long before i had heard of bob lazar’s ufo gravity-wave aiming-barrels, are shaped and oriented just like equivalents scaled up proportionately to my ship. Now that i review this, i realize they don’t need to be aimed, as the ships aims via the 8 repulsines, plus we can will portals without bending Space.
The nice guardhouse white haired man has a good vibe…and keeps reminding me of his lookalike in one of the Selene/Underworld movies. He here is clearly the phase2 milder/kinder one/version.
FB post I laughed at:
“
To celebrate the 29th ANNIVERSARY OF MY 30TH BIRTHDAY.” Lol”
Do not think/assume, “I didn’t talk to the hotties, so I ended up here.”; you DID talk to the hotties –MANY of them, and they ALWAYS behaved wrongly.
Do not think you are being punished with a bad situation/job; you are being WARRED against by such, but you ALWAYS make it work for you, extracting the only good.
Be GLAD they are showing gross vids to lure out scum, then trick/pressure/bribe them to sterilize and end themselves. This IS a blackop; you don’t just have to CALL it one to push through.
Note how the fugs BOTH OPENLY said they have sterilized and sickened themselves; those who deserve such are GETTING it, even SENTENCING themselves. Meanwhile those who deserve health (me and the hotties I have chosen) are getting THAT instead.
Did you miss opportunities? No. NO; you SAW how they insanely react to ALL your attempted good/healthiness/wisdom.
Could you have laid more hotties? Not yet; you SAW how they insanely reacted, etc..
Would you have done all the work you did… even if they HAD interacted appropriately with you? Possibly, but this way it gets done for sure, AND gets the uncompromising kajirae program WITH it.
As in childhood, you have been charged up, and you have chosen to harness that energy instead of wasting/dumping it on the humans, and you have succeeded in that choice/tactic/approach/method; look at all your accomplishments.
So accept this latest blood-boiling charge-back-up energy/point/blackop, and grin as all the fugtards end themselves out of your way.
remember the wise message on the radio: when the composer became famous/successful/wanted, his creating stopped… for a DECADE;
it was more than 10 years before he wrote ONE MORE PIECE OF MUSIC –because he’d become so busy/hired/booked playing his success-piece/s…
that he simply had no more time to compose.
so make damn sure you are ready for success/business… before/when you accept the hotties/10s who keep appearing.
wrap up your spell (novels series, website, computer models, etc.)
the Discord latest wave of would-be RP-ers is being deformed/disgusting again lol, but at least many had sexy avatars,
and their lists of optional celebs to write/ERP as DID help me check and further-complete my ICVs Directory.
it all works out
girls/hotties who are the correct/appropriate size for human females (which is the size I sense and say and decide they should and must and shall always be) always see my cock as the largest they would ever ‘take’/accept (be fucked by).
anyone who is not satisfied or intimidated by the size of my cock is too large, thus fat/overgrown, thus a monstrosity/deformity/failure.
I am the baseline/standard.
Amen.
if dan2tard (not malik, but ‘doc’) had been smart/honest/accurate/correct,
he wouldn’t have suggested/implied that Iii had missed anything;
he would have admitted that me being back here in his failed nation is a golden opportunity for HIM and HIS sorry kind/countrymen to catch up to MY wisdom, realizing/seeing what THEY had missed from MY attempts at interaction.
Even though I would have done the same amount of work, if the hotties had been around, even if they gave me all the manners and respect and space and time in the world, I still would not have had the total peace and silence and isolation which allowed me to think up all these ideas, remember ones I temporarily forgot, write them all down, meditate upon and expand them, and so on.
For all these ideas and journal entries and revelations/innovations/inventions, I am grateful I had the time I once was so saddened by and angry about.
Clearly, I was destined to be the one to have the most breakthrough ideas, and to see through all the scams / false prophets/experts, and to debunk all the fake doctors and illegitimate authorities/leaders. I have done all that, thus it was meant to be / destined.
It’s the first time I have a full tank of gas and fresh oil in a LONG time; YEARS.
It feels nice, Really nice.
only a phase1 creature (demon scum/retards such as humans so far) gets worse whether I interact with it or not, whether I give it input/guidance/commands or not.
phase2 beings stay the same.
phase3 beings always get better, becoming more and more of what I love and choose I deserve, whether I interact with them often or not.
That is how you can tell when a phase1 demon/loser is somehow present/lingering in this phase2. At least they have all injected/tagged/sterilized themselves, starting the process of the end of their disgrace/failure of a species. Amen.
…
I didn’t realize the exodus had started at my birth, and has lasted this whole time.
It was better that it didn’t happen with lots of people, as I had originally thought and wrote.
The military was also better than I wrote; I wrote of the USCMC; being offworld, dealing with big bug monsters, etc., but ended up IRL only being in the Corps, dealing with heat and rude morons.
…
I didn’t realize how long things would take; putting the final design-details on Inisfree and my ships (such as Persephone) took years longer, even once I’d isolated.
It would have taken the same amount of time if I HADN’T gone on expeditions; I’d still have spent the 30K on something, and still needed to work, and still had to relocate to get away from the trolls/demons/noisemakers.
I’m glad it took this long, though; it afforded me TONS more time to get TONS more realizations thought up, written down, and perfected, woven into my great/perfect spell/vision.
…
I didn’t realize that truly “10” (flawless/perfect) manifestations would occur.
I wouldn’t have been stressed and searching so much if I’d known that, or if they’d been reliable and behaving.
At least now I’ve witnessed that they manifest in person, far better than even the sexy images I chose for their webpages/spells/vision-boards; even when the spell isn’t quite perfect, due to what I was limited to finding/using/arranging, it still works OUT perfectly for me. Amen. Great sign/s.
I finally have almost all the food I loved and want. It feels very nice. It is wonderful.
as annoying as the insecure loser males chose to keep being back then,
note: all their sexiest females ALWAYS went for ME –even when I didn’t will it or care;
it has become automatic.
without CONSTANT monitoring and harassment, they would have failed a thousand times at stopping our natural attraction and unifying.
they will eventually fail.
also note: their females HATED them, YELLING at them, TRYING to get with me, even sometimes right in front of them.
note how they would sneak touches of me under blankets even when i sat a seat-cushion away from them.
note how they INSTANTLY trusted and sat next to me, just like all youngsters and animals have.
that is the surest sign there is.
the eyes are the other signs.
as are all the vibes.
ALL of them have ALWAYS been uniform; in alignment; showing Iii am the one, and good, and pure, and trusted by the good beings.
latest job… named after / started by another German.
interesting.
as usual, the USA / corporate-whore amerifail ruined it with their propaganda/evil, but still; I again ended up aligned with something German.
There is no such thing as temple guards; humans only pretend to be guarding them; their vibe was always revealing the same thing, that they were diversions/trolls/scum.
The temples don’t need guarding, or you can say they guard themselves –by not being destructible by humans.
If humans were guarding the real temples, they wouldnt have desecrated and biried so many, rearranging some, disabling others, and worshipping only lies and death inside those they still occupy (intrude upon).
All I do is polite. It is impossible for me to be rude –bc i am the baseline, for one, and bc i always chose manners, my intent always meaning i Was being polite, even if dumb animals such as humans assumed i wasnt or lied, claiming i wasnt. Only when living by my wishes/culture/rules/laws can anyone Else be polite. I am the lord.
I am the best looking man w the best cock and all else. I am the new and eternal standard. I am the center of all
Instead of training for extreme cold, train to manifest what you Want out at each expedition site and Inisfree. Amen.
Sane correct ppl will always genuinely tell me my website is brilliant, i am correct, and my whole life has been heroic and based on loving only the things which are worthy of love.
All the hotties i love, when truly manifested (not being mimicked by incomplete assholes), will, upon seeing me in person for the first time, get happy chills and ‘butterflies in their stomachs’ and run to throw their arms around me, crying out their relief before we start our first kisses, and then they will tell me they read my spells (webpages), and that my spells had stabilized them and their realms, freeing their ppl from all diseases and infiltrations and other evil bs. They will be eternally grateful to me, and eternally in love with me. They will also be eager to meet and be in love with all my other loves, getting along perfectly with us all. This is Inisfree, amen. I am Inisfree, amen. We (I and those I instinctively love) are Inisfree, amen.
Amen; so be it. Thus sayeth and manifesteth the Lord; Me. Amen.
…
I only wonder when this spell will take effect. Perhaps soon. Perhaps now. Perhaps already, as I now command time and the past, not just the present and future. Amen.
Ambi shall be Darkness and Shadow Incarnate in the good way, not a bully or tyrant at all, just soothing shade, sleep-assisting nightfalls, and so on. Amen. This spell removes the corruption that worsened/infiltrated her during the pre-Shift times/era.
She was whole before it; without being unbalanced by a ‘dark’ (evil) personality glitch/change. She shall be whole like that again -now- i.e. separated from the evil corruption which was never part of the original her/Lilith/Morrigan at all.
Amen.
Even though it is disgusting, repulsive, and evil that some food is now made by some plandemic retard junkies, …it has Always been; they have injected mindless shit this whole time. It hasnt affected me lime it does them, so i don’t worry. Also, i can shape more and more of this reality, so the food gets magically willed ideal for me just bc i want it to, even if i don’t say so with a spell. Also, i used to eat unhealthy stuff –for decades; i still made it and even beat all sickness. I will be fine. Rightly put off, but overall fine.
That haunted house reminded me of so many bad things;
Vampire giving wristband: how absentee bitch ambi has been,
The evil fake sister,
How nonvegan these beasts are,
How oblivious the girls are,
How lazy and out of shape these pigppl r,
Etc.
I wasn’t wrong to go, but…I prob won’t ever again
(remembering jefftard’s passive-aggressive bully cunty comment) “Iii might wanna see what information about me is online”??? NO; YOU might wanna stop being a creepy stalker and bully, you judgmental piece of shit.
“Corporate can check my social media”? Wrong; that is illegal.
Also, monitoring works both ways, and they are guilty of spreading cartel murder scams.
If they dont love everything about me, they shouldnt exist and shall end themselves now. If they aren’t everything i like others to be, they shouldnt exist and shall end themselves now. Amen.
1 year has ticked by here… I have mixed feelings about that; I got incredible amounts of work done, had unexpected leaps and breakthroughs, got the rest I really needed, and cut contact w thousands more fools/haters/NPCs. I didn’t want to spend a year in this state so overrun by losers, but… it sure had the undeniable effect of ensuring all my ideas came through without distractions, and that all my destined and needed work got completed as fast as could be; there was zero motivation to talk to Any of the disgusting fools who live here. Anyway, it is over; I did it, and now I am back in save-up mode at last, readying for the next jump.
I have kept finding perfect things over the years. Even some outwardly-perfect ppl; maybe it is now time when, my work finally complete enough, others who will regard my website and Me as exactly what They have been searching and waiting for… are here… and on their way to me… and will be exCited to complement and support me. Amen.
3s: exodus not possible bc no one was worthy, then exodus idea abandoned bc of plandemic plus still no one worthy, and then rd3?; exodus finally happening to my surprise?
Never feel bad bc u cannot again travel to the places which grievously and evilly wronged you; the hotties out there who showed themselves to you should be the ones who feel bad, as You went to Them, and made Every effort, yet they made none, and now They will have a harder time traveling to You to do Their half/part.
(regarding humans/humanity as a whole)
When they are as attractive as they have been ugly,
and when they are as polite to me as they have been rude,
and when they pay me as much as they charged,
and when they enhance my rights and name and health and powers as much as they stole them,
and when they help me fuck the girls I like… as much as they used to cockblock,
and when they praise me as much as they demonized me,
and when they renounce their bs fake religions and gods as much as they have clung to them,
and when they seek my guidance as much as they pressured me to seek others’,
and when they enforce only laws I write and command… as much as they enforced others’ laws,
and when they are as vegan as they have been nonvegan,
and when my ears no longer have the ringing,
and when my body is exactly what I always instinctively want it to be,
and when they give me the Yellowstone Club house I chose,
and when they clean up 100% of pollution and then generate ideal environments as much as they have trashed them,
and when they only have things I like on their radio stations and TV channels,
and when all their militaries and blackops and secret societies and alien allies swear ultimate allegiance to me,
and when they end all who ever disrespected or resisted me,
and when Inisfree is complete just as I envisioned and wrote about it,
and when groups of dozens of each type of my ICVs come to lovingly greet and stand guard for me,
and when all whom I said are now my wives, girlfriends, Companions, and kajirae show up and lovingly introduce themselves to me and give me their contact information and behave to me how I want them to,
And when they change for me as much as they pressured me to change,
then and only then will they be worthy of being some of my people,
so then and only then shall I give a damn about any of them.
Amen.
Until then, I am fine gaining further honor, pride, and strength -and bragging rights- by continuing this focus, spell, and holy life’s work of mine.
Even if the typists hadnt been retarded liars, i wouldnt have had time for them anyway.
Having 2 names is phase2. Thinking of myself as only the better one is phase3. Allowing only the bad given-name to be known and said by the fugtards is phase2; i keep the name i hate on my papers/IDs so they can mever bad-tone emit the name i adore and resonate with.
Interesting that they chose the name godfearing for themselves; they had no real god, they didnt follow the teachings, and they didnt fear Me Either; they only hated me and mocked their madeup god –by all their evil actions while angrily pretending to be good ppl.
Neg: “must be protected by satan”,
neutral: “must be lucky”,
pos and correct: “protected by god –who is him; protected by his own wise instincts focus”
Never try to be big or fit; just manifest and only allow the girls i want, the behavior i want, the appropriate size differences, etc., and never try to “last” or cater to them, as that is not masculine. Instead, dominate, use them, cum quickly as desired, and require them to be professional and always appreciative of your priceless time, and require them to help you cum quickly bc u need to get bk to your heroic genius work.
Note the phase3 events today: wave of hotties, wave of ideal rp, not having to ask, compatible w them all, and the sexualization of the show The Boys before i even saw one ep of it; we r skipping the tv/drama now and going right to the good heavenly stuff. Amen.
The more hottie pics i see, the more my blood boils, and i know now to fully embrace and leave unlocked it, for i am holiest and always right and due/prudent. I am the only enlightenment, evident. Ialone have behaved like the legends claim christ and the buddhas did. I will know me by my works. – the more hots i see ruining their beauty, or having fail forms, and not contacting me, the more i rage, and my rage has always kept me in shape, focused, protected, not settling
A single day of meeting compatibles…and all my work is paused/derailed lol. See? You Wouldn’t have gotten all done that you did…while they were refusing to be what you asked for and like. No way you could have. …but this happening now…is a sign it is the time for interaction and breaks and love and sex to resume. So be it. I have worked and solved long enough. Until next interval/shift/focus.
Dan is a p.o.s. who deserved to be blocked. I was always rdy for ambi and the others; i called out, trained hard, gave all my info. They were the ones not rdy for Me; they did Not call out, and did Not give their info. My body might not be rdy in My eyes, but their beHavior was Also not rdy. Phase fucking 2. At least i dont waste my breath or try anymore.
Maybe i am being stopped from running here…by good fellow sensors-ppl and fellow writers…bc running here keeps sucking; bugs, bad dnr fags, fatfug hitting on me, cops driving by, no jogging lanes, etc.. Here definitely is not a motivating place to run. I will run when in a good place…
How neat that what my instincts told me, what they deserve, what i wanted to do to them, what they need, what i was trained to do, what i wrote about happening to them, and what IS happening to them…are all in alignment.
Toasted Dave’s white bread, w pistachio butter raw, and fritos, is def a phase3 sandwich. Will also be w jam n a few days. Nook
Another wave of disgusting evil and retardation (corporate whoring toward the deviant/degenerate/blob masses), but i am using them to pay bills, and it makes it easy to leave the moment the next sign comes, and only the fugs there regurgitated the pharma scam (ie only the ones who should take it and die are), and it charges me up for btr nuts after shifts, and the new Discord wave was 100% elven shorty sub slut hotties that rebalanced the day
The more i write, the more of my spells shape minds and align all to me the way i want things. Another wave of erp, this time w all hottie avatars? Thats a 2becoming3phase sign. Amen. All the actresses and models and tiktokers i write sex scenes with/about…cause the irl formsakes/inspirations to becomes sired to me as my submissives, forever stabilized to look and behave and otherwise be exactly and totally how i want them to. Amen.
…
Writing a female character from time to time helps me program/spellcraft/manifest proper ICV behavior, too.
Discord w new hotties, auz was checking out a sex dungeon someone recommended, and donated to it in exchange to enjoy being one of its hosts for the day, tell her to be 100% slut, no inhibitions, jiggle her titties, lift up her skirt and turn around to hold her asscheeks apart, then slide her panties down to her knees, suck, swish and gargle, let her respond, now drool it onto your cupped hands, now snort it up and swallow, handstand splits, standing doggy wrists held back, hair tug and spank, grind while facing me and i slap her tits, gloryhole, spoon and leg up whileeye contact w voyeurs, atm, speculum and funnel dozens of guys’ cum
Copyrights are illegal if, for example, they are of “fictional” characters who happen to be real. What if Supergirl or someone else turned out to be nonfictional? Whoever used to have the copyright for that character no longer can claim that content control.
the 2nd wakanda movie…
mixed; some good, some awful;
neat to see wakanda again, and to be shown soft-disclosure of the secret Mayan nation,
but the casting was bad; fugtards,
and it was based on violence and tech’-dependency,
and they copycatted/stole the Iron Man suit, and the Predator suit, and the TR-3B,
and Kulkulkan (sp) IS a winged serpent god; he isn’t just CALLED that (thus the movie didn’t even bother to show dragons in a positive light),
and there was that cocktease live-action Ariel movie trailer… but it blackwashed/blackfaced her, and made her HIDEOUS,
and on and on,
but… at least it showed some sexy blue-skins for once.
it snowed the night after I got my job schedule
what perfect amazing timing and wonderful whitewashing
If the matrix was honest, not standard human/jewlywood polar-opposite lying/propaganda, it would have said that the Aghartans were in the Earth but not hiding there, and that the humans had been forced down to the Outside of the Earth, kept there by Teros and other machines IN the Earth’s CRUST, and that Humans had caused the pollution and tried to make everyone batteries. It also would not have one person be a savior; it would show how Everyone can and must save him/herself. But the Matrix was made by deathcult morons for deathcult morons.
No matter how blocky the appearance, or simple the current lifestyle, or few the allies atm, every single little action/task i take, every day, with every though and phone note and mc block placement…and webpg update…and file bkup…is one more choice to be brave, one more choice to be myself, one more instant of freedom, one more victory, one more middle finger to the retarded scum who tried to bully me into stopping what is right.
Lol finally found a google search google won’t do; lolicon.
Shameful. Just goes to show the illegal censorship, and lingering demonization of nature, and meddling in the private matters of sovereign beings.
Oh, well. Doesnt really matter. All i seek…is seeking me, and i always get what i want… eventually,
and we already were at war w the loser amerifails.
It’s so cool to look up at the moon with “new eyes”; I used to see it as heartwrenching bc of the romantic propaganda featuring it,
then phase2 hit, thus i saw it as only a cosmic body that looked neat and would be a stepping stone,
and now I see it as populated by the descendants of Angels who now have bases and cities there, and whose sexiest females I am destined to marry. Amen.
How interesting that i got the job…right when i maxed my cc again, needing the pay,
and right after i’d wrapped up the biggest and best wave of ideas/realizations and updates of my life so far,
and the moment i finally got a little tired of all the computer/mc work.
It will not be great, but its timing was perfect.
If only the females’ timing and manners had been. I guess that’s later in phase3, though. Whatever. Fine.
Maybe it is better…now that i have no urge to strain/exercise for them; it makes Them now stay on Their toes for Me…which i bet they instinctively like.
Amen.
Use the latest job as meditative; easy, keeping me standing, etc., plus showing me how to complete my groceey store.
It will serve its purpose.
It doesnt have to be great.
It is like “slapping the water in the buckets”, too; imagine your superpower once u r finally where u Want to be! Amen.
Only an unnatural demon scumbag loser would try a disgusting evil illogical spell / attempt to question/change/steer me, like “as long as you see her as an equal”;
scum are not equals,
uneducated are not equals,
rude are not equals,
tyrants are not equals,
plus good beings want me to be in charge, not an equal,
plus equals was a phase Two ONLY offer, and this is phase Three; godmode for Me, destruction for anyone not supporting me.
Amen.
oh, the irony -and typical/repetitive irony, at that- of him/them saying it is a red flag to him/them when someone blames someone/something else;
they’ve been blaming the Chinese, and imaginary viruses, and imaginary demons/devils for GENERATIONS.
It isnt that we r attracted to minors; it’s that we r attracted to femininity and pure goodness, not overgrown fakefemale monstrosities that r fugtards and two feet too tall to be natural. Most human females so far have looked like ogres or barfingly oversized. I asked for girls; females; what i have seen so far were not girls; girls are feminine, not oversized and never assholes to me.
It isnt that we r attracted to minors; it’s that we r attracted to femininity and pure goodness, not overgrown fakefemale monstrosities that r fugtards and two feet too tall to be natural. Most human females so far have looked like ogres or barfingly oversized. I asked for girls; females; what i have seen so far were not girls; girls are feminine, not oversized and never assholes to me.
Once again, the shit talkers worked n my favor; lol taught me a new very useful vril-causing search term
Madcastle was pun code coward-indirect-talk for “asylum”…but the real asylum is All of their homes/towns, and i have always been the orderly, trying to help them snap out of it.
All of them were psychotic; they r violent against so many beings.
A phase1 liar says “change; be compassionate”, etc.. A phase2 neutral yet accurate/honest would say about me, “you have clearly been compassionate and patient beyond belief.” A phase3 good being shall make up for the lies and bullying of phase1, and for the lame lackluster silence of phase2 by telling me, “You were wonderful; mpre compassionate than any of them deserved, and patient and selfcontrolled, and saintly, and a savior in so many ways, and he who sacrificed decades of his own life for all the right ppl and reasons. I salute you, my hero. I pledge allegiance to you, my king. I worship you, my god. And” -all the females I see as sexy say wholeheartedly to me- “I adore you, my husband eternal.”
I did my part to manifest my dream; to share love w all beautiful girls, i went around the world and was open to loving them,
but they did not do theirs; they and the rest were ugly, rude, stupid, insulting, panicking, lying, extortioning, etc.
At least I can say i did my part, and only rejected nonlove, i.e. that which i did Not seek.
Looking at stars to see what is there…gets interpreted by “the universe” as a wish upon those stars…for a surprise; random planet types, which they them spawn, the sensors detecting them, the scientists then assuming they are however old they seem.
Those who destroyed the ruins…only stopped their Own ppl from seeing/using them. Ppl like me automatically reform/restore them all, though; I am the living Lifestar beam. Amen.
I say all ruins magically/naturally reappear for me –bc that is how it works; they only apPear to be destroyed/ruined…by those whose nature is to manifest/assume that delusion, just like things in Space manifest, revealing that which their minds were focused on.
The ruins are all there for me.
It keeps occurring to me that central and s.amer. are to be decided, not merely traveled through while hoping for help; i should choose what i will find out there, not accepting that anything like mex can exist.
Waking up before my alarm, 1st and 2nd day at work, nice.
Getting to nap another half hour, nice.
No masks on dept team.
Masktards few and ignored.
Nice enough ldr.
Annoying recording on loop of vax scam, and some lame music, but it reminds me the scum are being holocausted like they deserve, and how i once again, as always, was and am immune to such obvioua psyops.
Interesting that he said “a girl” is why most say they came here. That is phase2; halftrue for me, as i half just needed quiet and rest and the completion of my books (spell/design/s).
Got the schedule i wanted, no resistance, didnt even have to explain or submit it. It’s even similar to my Schedule webpg, in terms of hours, at least.
Glad i am too busy w work now for as much pc stuff; i sensed it was time for a well-earned break from all that, and got it.
Main character: me, as it should be –and another good sign my instincts focused on what is right for me, keeping me strong/healthy and respected.
Supporting characters: Nyria, Amber 1, Ambi, etc.
Named, less-written characters: the directory ones
Names, no-dossiers characters: the Companions, some deities and dragons, etc.
Unnamed characters: those said to be our destined guests-population
And all shall continue manifesting even better than I wrote, each perfect to my dream-standard/s and instinct/s, just as perfect inside and out as motel/real-Ambi and beach-Sabrina were and are, amen.
the only place I shop… is where i get my discount… and get paid to be in the cold and the dark and around plants.
decent alignment THERE; on THOSE points, but WOW, how AWFUL the lighting, people, recordings, and other products are –and the location.
whatever. god just isn’t good at anything. hasn’t been in 4 fucking decades. failed and failed HARD, every – single – time.
worried that this job feels wrong, and all the people are idiots and disgusting?
I was just as worried, if not MORE so, when I was with the hotties.
and their beHAVIOR was JUST as disgusting as the REST of the humans LOOK.
so… there was that tradeoff; it wasn’t better with either.
both equally disgusted.
at least with this job, I get paid;
with the bitches, I was always LOSING money.
no more.
bitches pay for my time now. Amen.
EVERYONE pays for my time.
I never wanted PPL to leave me alone; I obviously only wanted SCUMBAGS to leave me alone.
I have been LOOKING for PEOPLE this WHOLE TIME.
haven’t found any yet.
Jordan Peterson failtards again;
life is not, as he assumes/claims, based on suffering;
suffering is not life’s baseline;
life is obviously based on a mix of things, and gets messed up by idiots like him.
since humans claimed Anunnaki came here and took our gold, and invented humans,
we can be sure that they STARTED here, and FOUGHT the invaders (humans), and took their OWN gold in order to ensure the invaders (humans) couldn’t misuse it.
and, ofc, that good beings were already here, not being evolved/created.
did ICC/Dark Fleet start that vax purge? idk. but it sure is nice that millions are being suicided out of my way. FINALLY.
I hate the lies these humanimals tell, and the lies on their broadcasts, but i sure couldn’t love anymore how they are now committing suicide so i don’t have to deal with them.
if only ALL of the humanimals would.
obviously, being a holy being, i want to be strong enough to wipe/purge them myself, but this is a decent phase2 development/progression.
Jamie showing me the planes collision clip…vibed as some sort of latest indirect attempt to keep discouraging my travels. Good thing it was tx scum ending, and good thing I know non-airplane travel tech’/options now.
Paradise in the work freezer on day2; i will love antarctica; i adjusted so quickly
Serious dejavu from ruins chat w zack at the green rack. Ugh
Produce dept is offered without me asking, and is way better than backstock
I keep getting the idea that ending my pc work…is allowing it to manifest
Nothing is in ruins; what was reported and shown and written about were all just manifestations of the expectations of those who went there. The “ruins” (and All sites) become/are whatever each visitor believes/expects. For those who only wanted to ruin things, they only found ruins, thus learned and gained nothing, only able to further ruin/rubble/bury them. For me, however, the ruins reveal all, and rebuild themselves, or, perhaps more accurately, show how they were never ruined at all. Amen. I am the one.
Ambi is everything I wanted and want in my beloved top wife and high queen; we have made it through our courting and challenges, and are fully calibrated to one another, amen. She doesn’t want to be a villain, and she knpws and professionally admits I was right about so much… and her typist was wrong.
Amazing that they gave 3 days…right when i turned out to need them; under th weather a bit
If the toilet plastic bar had not broken off, i would not have called to repair it; it seems even when i am lazy or apathetic now…things still happen/work to my benefit.
Jordan peterson idiocy clips; lying again, or -worse- actually believing the retarded shit he says; claiming most ppl r not parasitic, when most are nonvegan, thus parasitic.
Anyone rich and famous is a total failure; bc they have been liked by the masses, those ppl always being wrong, disgusting, and evil.
I hate ambi a little less today; realizing i nearly forgot Dimah Tchakova, and reviewing all the months-long focuses/work i could never have done while distracted by anyone, makes me consider she has stayed away…to allow me to do these things.
I also keep thinking that when she and our 4 children show up, it will be the time to focus just as much on Them, which they deserve, ofc. I will give them what was denied Me. We are meant to he a family, after all; there is no need for them to go alone through a thousand abusive places like i was forced to.
I keep getting the idea and feeling -instinct- that zach saying the druids did not have written language…bc they worried it would reduce memory capacity…is only partially true; it may also have been bc writing things down causes others to assume only written records are accurate, then manifesting both that assumption and their assumptions about how they interpret the writings. In other words, written records can be a double-edged sword, preventing The Telephone Game effect, but also causing alternate views, focuses, and realities/timelines/histories when people believe and hold the visions of different things. Good thing my mind has proven powerful enough to align all to me, even the timestreams/dimensions. Amen.
Ambi n that tan suburban in mt was a partial manifestation
The more I dig and find out how the bitches thought, and the more i experience how evilly they fail and bait and hyper/overreact, the more relieved i am that i correctly chose to stop wasting time giving them chances to talk. It is only natural for females to talk on command, anyway. Amen
Interesting I am where Abraham Lincoln, if he was real, is said to’ve grown up. Also interesting that he banned slavery, which was still enslaving all American to his way, technically, and then the country enslaved almost everyone via debt and fake-healthcare addictions/dependency, and now I have brought balance by figuring out the real cause and cures of all disease, plus by reinstating slavery but only for those who love to be submissives/slaves.
Interesting win-win that has occurred to me regarding ambi; it is a win she is real, it is a win she came to me multiple times of her own free will, it is a win she is physically perfect at least from how she looks in clothes, it is a win her voice is perfect like a mermaid/Siren, it is a win she gave me space, it is a win she showed up regardless of my cussing and income, it is a win she answered one of my cries, it is a win sue intercepted/rendezvoused, it is a win she is shorter than me, it is a win her typist pissed me off enough that i ended contact with it thus got tons more work done, it is a win even that a disgusting dumbass blob monster showed up at the indy lantern park both times (bc it put me off plenty so i would stop messaging either), it is a win i stood up and shut down the typist’s punkass lying and shittalking and hypocrisy, it is a win that i overcame my own urge/lust even for her perfect10 irl, it is a win that she or the typist at least encouraged if not yet directly facilitated me fucking other hotties, it is a win she said what sounds like she already considers me her husband, it is a win to even get more lip service blowing-sunshine from doc dan claiming she will return soon even though the typist said it is finished, and it is even a win if she broke up w me –bc i didn’t end up w kids w an incompatible fickle flake bitch.
If real ambi isnt compatible w me, then it is a win we are not in contact rn,
and if she IS still secretly compatible w me and going to return, it is a win and a miracle she is patient enough to give me all these years to have all of my vision and wrap up all my life’s work design spell/s.
Either way, it has been a win.
Hopefully this means she knows it will help it manifest perfectly, thus free my attention to fully focus on and love Her and our Family every day she and I reunite in our Yellowstone Club home after our work/jobs.
…
Whether my focus and choices and spells and calling out manifested her, the real her (and real Rain, real Sabrina, Nina ICV at Earthship Nebraska, Amber and Nyria ICVs at Black Robin, and the other flawless hotties) still looks and sounds perfect, so that is logic enough for me to continue my writing/website updates, just in case they Are working that way, perfecting and summoning all I ever wanted and instinctively knew is right.
The realAmbi is infinitely hotter than that blobmonster disgrace that was at the indy lanterns park, and even hotter than the playby/character –who technically has no appearance other than its 2D avatar/pic,
so it stands to reason that realAmbi is equally (infinitely) smarter than that dumb bitch typist,
and equally (infinitely) more polite.
She is clearly a phase3 manifestation.
I will give her a chance.
…
Nothing in phase1,
then 2D in phase2,
and now 3D in person to signify the start of perfect phase3.
It being phase3, she and the other hotties will Always come back to me, as hotties only passed by n phase2, and only left or worsened in phase1.
…
Do not worry about the bullshit the typists said, bc they were phase2.
Do not worry about betrayers, bc they were phase1 lingerers, easily vibe- and eyes- and tone- and actions-identified.
You know the vibes have been pure-good on the true-hotties…for a while; they r dif ppl, and Real ppl, and Good ppl, amen, so give them their chance, amen.
…
If any bs still happens, no matter; i easily dump and replace, and know how to survive. How amazing and telltale and miraculous and due will it be when these hotties finally unite w me and start forever supporting me, thus my life’s work?
Maybe they already have; by making sure i write spells to keep them how i want them, and by not distracting me until i am ready to enjoy them.
Amen.
dejavu from the old guy at groc inviting me to his knife shop with view of river;
brought back emotional memory/vision of me, years ago, worrying about going there and being talked to by another motormouth/staller/xian.
glad I again chose not to.
nothing good comes of giving xians my time.
it keeps occurring to me that my ears noise could just be the result of years of sedentary/buildup…
which was always exercised/flexed/moved out before; when I was active…
but that still doesn’t cut it; god still isn’t off the hook; my body should adjust and operate well/perfectly no matter WHAT i’m doing.
it’s annoying that this latest “manager” is another veteran loser fug-fucker…
and that he thinks doctors and viruses are real,
but… it does mean his line is suffering, which it deserves.
the only reason i feel a bit unwell rn is all the evil i am having to work amidst,
and bc they didn’t pay me when they said they would, so my nutrients are lacking since i can’t afford food.
anyway, another phase2 half-good half-bad thing;
the retard talks about his “sick” son, then about how great eating corpse flesh (burgers) is.
lmfao; he has the cause and the cure right there, but he’d never believe me.
…
and another red flag;
i walked by, said nothing, made no sound, and he insecurely quickly asked if i had made the scoffing nose sound at his burger comment.
i asked what he was talking about, bc i hadn’t even been paying attention.
then when he told me, and i asked what it was, and if it was a restaurant he was talking about, the OTHER worker DID scoff, but at ME…
for politely/neutrally asking a QUESTION; he actually condescended… bc i didn’t know about their favorite local corpse restaurant…
what a fucking moron.
and the worst/best part? when that guy DID scoff, he didn’t care at ALL;
he was perfectly FINE scoffing at ME, just not when i SEEM to scoff at HIM.
what a fucking sociopath.
can’t wait to quit.
i’ll pay my bills and bounce.
another evil hell tapped and ditched like it deserves.
…
and lmfao; “when he quit, he really hurt that department”; NO; that dePARTment and your STORE and YOU are really hurting US/OTHERS;
you are LITERALLY GENOCIDING people,
breaking COUNTLESS laws –including international ones–
and playing music you yourSELF said you can’t stand,
and selling ACTUAL POISON,
yet you blame the SLAVES/WORKERS you FORCE to leave… on hurting things/people/departments.
you’ve been hurting yourSELF/SELVES.
fucking fool.
fucking delusional piece of shit shittalker.
typical brainless farmy.
typical veteran.
typical amerifail.
In phase1, it was all about denying the self;
covering w clothes,
claiming ppl were bad,
forcing them to learn about others,
brutalizing any honesty,
lying and rewarding only liars,
working a set schedule,
claiming a savior and products were required,
and they change/corrupt all, such as via queers and trans evil bs,
etc.
…
but then I instinctively and correctly stood against that, seeing through it even as a child, overcoming it, and now having These ideas;
now we have our Own spiritual experiences,
and the focus and savior is Me,
and work is based on My nature/schedule,
and My body and clothes likes are the baseline,
and we learn about each Other, Not strangers, and Not madeup ppl/”historical figures”,
etc.
…
Because of that switch back to self and truth, we are now in the start of Phase 3;
all which is not natural me… is killing itself,
the war is now fought by my Enemy…For me…i.e. aGainst itSelf,
and only My nature is allowed, etc.
Come ambi or not, i did amazing work here yet again, i have a lot to be proud of, and i have been able to hold pos this time –and even have some money for pleasure. I have also learned that no matter how angry i get, or lose my cool, or cuss at god, ambi is real and still shows up…as do other flawless hotties, such as sabrina. And if i hadn’t had no contact from all hotties so far, all these SORELY needed and AMAZING site updates -COMPLETIONS- would Never have happened. No matter how goddess or patient any of them Might have been, contact w them this soon would have been pointless; i couldn’t respond without preventing the final parts of my ideas/vision/work. Hopefully the hotties/goddesses love that i rage when not w them, and want them this much, and pele sees i burn/erupt just like she does; kin.
irlj/revs3
mon21nov2022
I just realized that all I wrote DID happen; my spells ARE that powerful;
it is only the HUmans CLAIMing they didn’t… bc humans always lie.
the vatican is still up… only in their LIE/deLUSION.
MY words/spells/vision/choice… DID create the timeline fix.
they just haven’t accepted it yet –which is why they keep dying out, killing themselves.
amen.
…
I ALSO just realized that the Celestine had me THINKING a team would form,
but the SIGNS were that it was not TIME for a team; it was only time for me to SCOUT back then.
NOW that Iii have DECIDED what team will form, it is time for my team/s; I had to HAVE and HOLD the vision of them FIRST,
and was NOT destined to have just “ANY OTHER PERSON/TEAM”, but the BEST and PERFECT one.
irlj/revs3: 6pm tue22nov2022
doc h and the fake father were both non-men;
they just repeated “how things were” where they’d gone,
and defaulted to the negative,
and assumed that there is no power over “living by the sword”,
when in reality… you don’t automatically die by doing one thing or another,
and “living by the sword” is heroic, not bad/negative/evil,
and…
I’ve proven able to see through all their regurgitated fake wisdom…
to how things ACTUALLY are.
noon, Wed23Nov2022
How I raged against having to come back again…
and how evilly the typical americunts treated me all over again, doing every foul play they knew they could get away with for now.
…but eventually I found a place to rest,
and got more good work done toward my lifelong goal than I ever have elsewhere,
and I remembered how way-better (perfect) versions of my characters/writing/spells have started showing me they are real, not fantasy/fiction (anymore) at all,
and I built fly-through / playable models of all my favorite places in my novels series,
and I completely overhauled and perfected my chatrooms server,
and dramatically improved my skills/abilities/potential in my favorite games,
and the website updates I’ve thought up and completed… make it look almost like a whole new site, it’s so much better and polished up.
…
Apparently there are 3 exoduses in my life, just as there are 3 phases;
the first exodus was forced on me; to Texas and so on,
then solo; my ‘choice’/instinct,
and finally… a permanent relocations/mega-migration once I am forever united with my destined people (who I’ve been writing about / spellcrafting)
…
Being forced by a late paycheck to fast… interestingly is healthy.
…
Every return to the stores is disgusting, but nothing drives more work/progress like that,
and nothing charges me up, ensuring my mind focuses enough to manifest another ‘jump’/portal/improvement/phase, like that…
The old guy telling the story of being a POW and having to deal with them pouring out his water cup and rice cup…
vibes as another lame attempt to make me appreciate where I am rn, even though the people are rude and shitty,
–and he was a self-admitted xian; a liar/scammer/fool, so… probably another made-up story / exaggeration, but whatever.
let this job enrage you; your rage is your most-natural emotion so far (while amongst these disgusting monsters/losers),
and it got you in shape,
and make you a better Marine,
and lead you around the world,
and defeated even your own lust,
and makes use of what your ears-thing has done to you,
and makes you feel GOOD when channeled in to PT again –and vampire songs/concerts/jam-sessions.
Let them re-enrage you. It is time.
Reassessing, the signs all pointed to the same thing; it was never time to network back then, or even make friends, as none behaved friendly, and none talked w me when i tried, and none sought friendship. It was only time to explore and See them all, and to be stimulated to calibrate them For them; to do my spell/s, which i now have done. Thus i missed No opportunities, and took them All, and wasted No time after rjh, and have become Perfect at sensing signs and maintaining the right mayanSchedule speed.
If you werent bored and disgusted and wanting btr muscle tone, you wouldnt review your site, make time to fix it, or workout; you’d be content, thus no wonders would get dreamed up and made, and no adventures or bragging rights would be. Accept this interval time that so fully motivates you to finish this amazing life’s work.
When i let go of mex/ushuaia, ambi appeared.
When i let go of eli, again she appeared.
Maybe now that i am letting go of the site updates, she will return.
Big milestone today: finally sorted the very last folder in my pc; only final uploads from here on : ) wow
Bummer; today i found out one of the ingredients in the vegan thanksgiving kit is bs iron. Oh, well; letting go… causes better to replace it.
The vids of animals panicking as ppl try to help/rescue them…keeps reminding me of how stupid humans kept being every time i tried to have normal interaction w any of them. They really were dumb beasts not worth it. Best to let them die. Compassion and faith and chances only led to them spawning more monsters. Better to be compassionate to mySelf. Amen.
Bitches throwing that lie pedo term around are just cowards insecure they are old and irrelevant and didn’t take care of their looks/health. REAL women PRAISE those who are sanely attracted to girls in their prime; bc that shows standards, values, reason, and best spawning odds, etc.
Tried a dozen races of apple
Another huge and unexpected update and leap forward; all remaining best hotel pics staged and half uploaded, and new expedition webpg spells created.
Finally resumed jogging. Felt good.
In the park, I keep getting visions of toddler Neveah reaching up to hold my hand as we hike w our family <3
More phase2 signs during latest hikes;
1) Group of 3, the old fug woman in front did not greet me, the meh dude n middle did, and the tan blonde hottie following him made eye contact but did not greet me,
(the old woman and the man both shall not be there next time; only hotties who treat me how i want to be treated shall survive and return to me, amen)
Then 2) at the lookout tower, i timed my ascent to be after it cleared out, but was followed up by a non-male loser and his whale bitch, but i didnt get accosted by them.
Why pick the best hotels…when i refuse to go there during their masktardation? Bc eventually i will be able to manifest/force them to behave. It’s also a flex. It’s also holding the good vision. It’s also the sane standard and baseline. It’s also a phase2becoming3 sign/marker.
With staying put so long, all the energy/power which manifested in decades of world travels…have been manifesting Inisfree and my YC home instead…and rewiring ppl; getting those I hate…to kill themselves, …and getting those I want…to want Me. Amen.
Does real ambi being (looking and sounding) that perfect…mean only that the lame shadowgovt is finally making an effort, …or does it mean my spells/focus are/is finally complete and paying off correctly (perfectly)?
I won’t travel anymore to rude/nonvegan places/ppl, so everywhere I want to go…is just going to have to become populated by the ppl i require to be there.
It took 6 years for my envisioned purge to start happening, but it did.
The timeframe was always a bit different than i wrote/guessed, but so much still happened.
Maybe that means in another month or year or so…everything else i wrote will, too; my city, my family with Ambi, my superpowers (unlocked/restored/chosen/spellcrafted normal abilities), you name it.
There’s nothing wrong w control, so long as the right person is in control; you want the pilot controlling the airplane, for example, not the dog or psycho, and you want the fireman controlling the firehose, and the farmer controlling the crops, and me ofc controlling it all.
Things come in waves; school, then training, then travel, then website, then models, etc.; they did not mix; there was one type of wave at a time.
Noise did not bother you in training; there are times when you don’t mind noise, so don’t worry about noise from future destined fam’. They will make the right noises.
Ppl never once behaved normally/well, so why try to share love w any of that sorry failed species? Share love w yourself.
Sure, i cannot enjoy talk or kisses or silence bc of the ears stuff, but i can at least demand only the best; at least i will focus on good appropriate quality things and selfrespect so my issue is the only negative/unpleasant thing.
There was no reason ppl couldnt have behaved and been presentable along the way, but them not… led to the kaj program, and the new laws, and so on.
I hate this latest forced bad job for good reasons, but it is plants, cool air, movement, pay enough for my needs, and shows me more groc products i would have hurried by otherwise.
Will the elf chick be at the holiday concert a third time in a row? Will she be the correct height and attitude now?
40 yrs of enduring; it is time my labors pay off. Where r the fruits of my labors?
If i had talked to more, more would have been rude and left me upset, and i would still have had to let go of all i talked to –bc they kept having mood swings and doing evil. We would have been cut off by the scamdemic, anyway.
Maybe th delayed paychecks r to buildup to ensure i have it for website; not spent too soon
Teaming up was another phase1 brainwashing scam; it only ever Muddied/Mixed the vision; it did Not result n more ppl holding it w me.
Dont “beat yourself up” about choosing to avoid drama by not talking to the hotties; those hotties always behaved badly, They are Just as guilty for not talking to You, and though you Still got drama bs from the fugs even when u Didnt chat w the hotties…it would have been worse if you had. EVERYone was causing drama bs back then. You trusted your instincts, minimized the bs, and did well
Just like the phases and bitches, 1st didnt show and caused problems, 2nd showed but canceled out, 3rd is auto and full but not making up for bad, just being easier
I didnt want to be here, or to be alone this long again, but it feels nice to now be caught up w literally everything, and to have so many wonders now built and easy to enjoy whenever i want. I was right to’ve disregarded that which manifested before. I wish it has been better, but it was only phase2; plenty of time (eternity) for it to be ideal next/now.
So fkd up they write reports about violent threats, yet daily assault and rape and kidnap and murder BILLIONS of beings…
There’s always the flux; i wait for when the pusbback will be; less pharma, more open travel/borders.
The only thing i want for xmas is to be out of this town of retards…and into my yc home w ambi. I want inisfree, too, ofc, but as long as i gtfo of goddamn madison…and never have to return.
As much as i hate their idiotic lies and parroting, i Definitely want these losers believing the scamdemic and injecting shit, sterilizing, sickening, and killing themselves.
Every time i tried to share love and truth, the humans behaved badly and worse, and right when i finally thought id give it one more try w them, they behaved the most cowardly and bully and stupid and turnoff-ing of all : / …Maybe these r signs i was never supposed to team up w them at all. : /
So retarded that randal carlson talks about ppl faking reports when evidence doesnt fit the narrative…yet he quotes the biggest fake report and narrative of all time, the bible.
In spite of the amazing work i have done here, i hate this awful place and am ready to go.
Cussing and jacking and plotting and everything…didnt stop her from showing up. Not believing didnt stop her. Not praying didnt stop her. Porn didnt. You dont have to delete or chg anything. She’ll show up when she wants to.
I rmbr not getting this shit groc job when i applied n 2015…so why am i feeling dejavu about talking to the mgrs about my late paychecks?
The toughest warfare is when u r alone, and have no support or hope, or even contact w your kind, and no wpns or power to fight the evildoers, and simply must endure indefinitely, so u can at least take pride in knowing you have since childhood been fighting and surviving the toughest kind of war. Every gross evil bs thing these scummy peasants do…is another battle/attempt to derail your site, so keep seeing it as that battle/fight/war, and win, bc only u can, and your life’s work and shining beacon of a middle finger of a website depends on you overcoming their grossness and staying put long enough.
Even overloading the cart when there is no need…is a diversion to stfu the idiots…and a paid workout.
You focused on military and got it, then on school and got it, then on travel and got it, and even babes during and got it, and the babes left each time you decided they were useless/risky, and then you focused on exodus scouting and got it, and pyramid and got it, and getting back and got it, and finding a place to rest and got it, and city modeling and got it, so now focus on fitness and ambi and the yc cabin; you never needed riches to do all you did, nor even a team or prayer; you just focused. It can take a while; months, etc., but you keep getting it. So choose to accept and stay focused on the hotties who come/return now. Focus on them being rich and supporting you.
So nice to wake up to the rains and just relax n bed all morning
Nice to be told of the schedule update
Nice to be able to stand in a cool room w plants and no ppl each shift
Exposed to all the nonorganic trace chemicals…but no observed effect
This town keeps showing me how little it values me; incompatible stuckup bitches, lowest pay legally allowed, etc., so i move again asap, duh.
Phase1 default negative retardation: “don’t let perfection be the enemy of excellence”,
Phase2 neutral: “perfection is possible, and it is fine to wait for it”,
Phase3 correct: “you are a hero and a saint to have solo stood firm for the holy standard, and ppl should not have shown up substandard pretending to be excellent, bc perfection in so many forms is so easy w just slight effort”.
I ended up in shit situations even when i avoided talking to the hotties, trying to keep the peace with the fugs who were somewhat useful;
i still lost places to stay, and was insulted and otherwise grievously wronged, etc.,
so it SEEMS like i may as well have talked to the hotties,
but every time i did/tried, the hotties were just as rude and useless,
so i was RIGHT to keep disregarding BOTH “sides”, as BOTH behaved as if they were one and the same; the RUDE/DUMB side.
funny/interesting/noted, how this latest shit job…
has rekindled my daily desire to do more site updates/wrap-ups.
whatever works, i guess.
me being ugly and unwanted… and unpaid…
stimulated/forced so much learning, trying, exploring, growth, bettering.
…
the gross/bad/unwanted keeps causing so much good to be created.
and reinforced.
and the vision becomes stronger and stronger…
memtag clonemod.
2 hotties on Mon28Nov2022
1st was white elven redhead w hair tight back tightly, black tight pants, meandering through the aisles. but had ear-rings and didn’t introduce herself.
2nd was a shorty w perfect medium-tan shapely legs, black short-shorts, perfect face, dirty blonde, perfect voice, perfect timing; right at a few minutes before my 9pm exit. but might have had ear-rings, and didn’t introduce herself.
more phase2 bullshit reminding me i’m not with my ppl, and not w polite ppl, and so on.
fuck this hell.
fuck these fakes/teases.
no way to know if they are vegan,
or against the scam religions,
or smart,
or honest,
or attractive/healthy under those clothes,
or drug free,
or infertile / against preg-bs,
or not out to ruin another good man’s life,
and not a single member of their ENTIRE SPECIES ever good to me so far;
zero reason to engage w them,
and zero chance they would be even close to what i’m looking for.
i don’t understand why their kind keeps fucking w me like this, doing the opposite of what i ask/ed for.
i never ONCE fucked with them / their kind.
and even if they WERE all the things i wanted, …there’d still be no way/power for me to stop interference from the insecure beta bitch boys.
and rmbr all the times their kind ACTED like they were interested, only to switch to autism panic faces and insults and total reversals?
no, thanks.
not worth the risk, not worth the stress, not worth the anything.
not until they start behaving for the first time.
…
if they hadn’t had ear-rings,
and if they’d walked up and introduced themselves to me,
and asked me if i wanted to hang out with them,
and given me their numbers,
and somehow confirmed to me everything i want and need them to be,
THEN THAT would be SOMEthing,
but they didn’t; they did what every OTHER dumb useless bitch has;
they walked on by.
probably for the best.
after another long day/shift of only fugtards,
and no food,
and shit pay,
and rationing,
i’m not in the mood for more bitches, anyway.
they’d have to be actual angels, and return, and apologize, and ask me out, for me to give a damn.
until then, god can burn in hell of cockteasing me TWICE in the same shit shift.
whatever.
nothin new from THAT retard.
40 fuckin years of the same broken-record evil/bullshit.
40 fuckin years of denying me my culture, and what my instincts know are right.
…
same old shit; no effort from their sorry kind.
dumbasses or heartless; they either can’t tell what i obviously want/require, and/or don’t give a damn what i asked for.
either way, still no effort from them or god.
typical.
just another sign they haven’t gotten better at all,
and aren’t my people,
and aren’t what i’m attracted to.
…
and even if they DID do everything i like,
how am i supposed to enjoy that?; i need my money back, my rights, my name, my credit, my health, and on and on.
…
next morning: after how those two bitches behaved, I couldn’t be more turned off.
after how every member of their entire SPECIES has behaved -for the past FOUR DECADES- , I couldn’t be more turned off.
They really are as unattractive, useless, and despicable as can be.
I suppose at least they / their kind are consistent; I always know just how they’ll behave; that they’ll always choose to do the dumbest, most unattractive thing/s.
…
however, with how many ideas I’ve been getting and uploading/processing/editing/reviewing/revising, I suppose I could say I’m also GLAD that they haven’t interacted/behaved how I want;
interaction w them would eat up too much time, stalling/delaying/preventing these spells/updates from starting to manifest.
so maybe the fugs ensure I pay attention to what I should LEARN/REALIZE/INVENT,
and then the hotties are ICV protos/test-runs to see if I like them before they are mass-printed in batches for Inisfree.
maybe they are staying quiet/boring… to ensure I am motivated only to complete my life’s work.
…and enraged just enough that my emotion/Vril-energy keeps fueling/centering/directing/empowering me.
The jobs keep me from burning out on the pc. I was burning out.
I asked for the most beautiful girls in each realm, and they showed up,
but apparently I also needed to ask for them to be compatible with me, because none of them behaved compatible.
so… now I do that.
…
I also asked to SEE each realm, and I GOT that/to,
but apparently I also needed to ask for each realm to be compatible with me, not just showing me ITS PRE-me best,
but making/having/manifesting places that I suitable for ME.
With all the blueprints-auto-building, I now see why I ended up with so many full stacks of dirt and grass; to close in their terrain/foundations.
With the height of my grocery store being instinctively set to 80′ (30′ ceiling for the basement, and 50′ for the main floor), I now see why; the signs in 43 languages each… require that much room to be hung out of the way of the shoppers/carts.
Things keep working out… even when they seem too great/much at first.
Amen.
It doesn’t really matter, apparently, whether I am here or somewhere else;
everywhere I went was the same; bad diets, bad attitudes, bad job offers, etc..
Still, I can’t help but feel the pull to the YC.
seeing the latest round of work idiots as battles…
kinda takes the edge off, and makes me refocus and recommit to getting the $ I need, but it still fucking sucks.
why would that retard ask me if i like music, and then tell me about someone dying?
a normal person would ask if i like music, then tell me about MUSIC.
the retardation of that kevin turd is astounding;
several times in a row, telling me the same thing, and then it being wrong according to the training the same day lmfao.
how OCD.
he even tried threatening/scaring me with a “spying” (“watching on the cameras”) claim –which is also untrue –and pointless even if it WAS true.
so that makes him an idiot, a pest, AND a liar.
and such a panicker and spaz.
so typical of his generation.
and then retardedly telling me to cross things off the list… when i didn’t have access to it… bc it was HIS list… on the handheld HE kept taking…
just wow.
can’t wait to quit.
fuck.
“mAyBe ShE iS sEeIiNg If YoU wIlL sTaY iN oNe PlAcE a WhIlE”
RETARDED;
why the fuck would I stay anywhere if ppl aren’t ever good to me?
why would I stay anywhere where my dreamgirl isn’t / dreamgirls aren’t?
why would she WAIT instead of HELP?
why wouldn’t she GIVE me a reason to stay?
why would she wait to see… when she supposedly can see and step through time?
just smh.
god, I hated that dumbass typist.
all talk, just like eli.
manifesting only more stalling, just like tsb scumbag.
–
December:
After how retarded they all behaved, whether i talked to them or not, i’m not sure i Want any more of them to show up. Obviously i Do want them if they beHave, but…the fact they Never did…at All…no matter How i talked or was…says a lot.
Only having enough for food…sometimes…is too much like being a wild animal, in my opinion.
I get paid to enjoy cool air. I get paid to grocery shop. Technically I even get paid to review store designs and make my own.
I have first dibs on the freshest possible produce and other products…at least until i am growing my own
This was the first time i paid rent a day or two early, and had extra money …hundreds of dollars extra; this was another decent step/improvement.
I am Very happy with and proud of my grocery store design.
Deja vu from so much : ( –the berries drop, the old idiot watermelon slicing, and much more. I hate this.
I want to finish my novels from within Inisfree, based in real events…like my first two novels are; I want my family w ambi and the other flawless hotties. Now.
Life is not good enough rn. I thought eventually they would learn and be good, but apparently i have to initiate everything. Might as well keep/resume trying, as my job sucks in every way; ppl, music, pay, food, customers, etc.. Will i get screwed again? Does it really matter?; i am alReady screwed. I will never be able to afford escaping here if i don’t resume chatting w goodlooking ppl who easily make $. I didnt get what i wanted; Them initiating, …but at least i can get Something; them either way. Thry r the new priority. No daily work and nightly computer stuff. I now let go of that phase2 all-work stuff/mindset, letting the complete-enough spell manifest. I will spend my time n public, giving hotties more chances to see me…and me more ppl to escape with. It is fucked up that they answered my calls, and knew it was me, but then refused to do anything i liked, and seemed to expect me to read their minds…but whatever. They r how they r. Maybe they are reQuired to answer my calls, and reQuired to wait for further instructions from me. Anyway, this year was what i needed; i wrapped up EVERYTHING…and now am able to focus entirely on ppl and getting back to the YC.
Why is it that everyone i talked to was a waste of time, yet every hottie i Wanted to talk to but didnt…made me worry i had missed opportunities?; never once did one of those Celestine coincidence appearances lead to anything i liked; there were only stuckup bitches and dirty looks from losers. : / I guess my heart just always hopes.
Krogtards.
Why have 13 dif things…when there are not that many to refill? Lol duh. And when the training said to only take as many as you feel safe pushing.
The phase1 evil increased during 2000 and military and fake courts, surging like waves, then faded. Then phase2 meh surged the same way; briefer jobs, briefer bs, longer solo time, more progress, and now it fades; deleting meh vids, etc.. Phase3 has started, not yet surging; hotties blinking in and out, getting sexier, trying harder for my attention. Reminds me of the India temples format; 3 rectangular prism sections, successively taller, each like a mayan ziggurat stack, and finally the 4th section largest and like phallus, meaning phase3 leads to arousal/attraction and the ultimate, and heaven being the longest Age.
They were Never “many”; they were always One voice, and No/Zero mind; they were just mindlessly repeating/looping lies, hoping you would fall in line mindlessly With them.
YOU were Always more than them; you were Also one voice, but One mind –and your OWN mind.
and while they couldn’t even do right while IN a seemingly huge group,
YOU ALWAYS did right, even while ALONE, even while THREATENED, even as a CHILD;
you were ALWAYS more powerful than them –even when they abused their fake system to extort and steer/force you.
Since they never had minds or willpower of their own, they never manifested anything; they just kept showing up at their retard barn/temple, chanting mindlessly, manifesting/maintaining only those weekly hangouts/chants.
YOU, on the other hand, even withOUT others helping you hold a/the vision, manifested WORLD travels and inventions and revelations for DECADES.
Compared to them, you really ARE god / a god.
They still haven’t learned a thing;
they still are rude and stupid and insecure and a turn-off in every way,
surrounding you with gross bullshit,
and dangling an almost-hottie in front of you once a season or so,
and the hotties don’t even do the most basic things; introducing themselves, letting you see if they are truly healthy/’hot’, etc.;
they are still walking on by,
trying to bait you,
vibing as the heartless, uneducated, sexiest idiots they are -and Have been this whole time.
And they think at some point they’ll “get it right” by dangling a hottie I can’t resist…
when it is the total opposite; they’d have to ALL be hot,
and all the enemies would have to be slain,
and the hotties would ALL have to return and GROVEL to me,
and worship me as the one true king and god,
and my community would have to be built,
and all the rudeness/wrongs committed against me paid for with interest,
and even then… they still would have come from the world and species which has turned me off comPLETELY;
it would take them YEARS to re-earn any of my trust, much less any attraction/interest from me.
Four decades now, and they still haven’t even learned to not be disgusting,
and still haven’t learned I never chase,
and still haven’t learned to say hello.
Wow; talk about a complete failure of a species and culture and school system and religion and government and civilization.
…
at least it sure does ensure my vision gets worked on more each day,
more published (even if I chose not to publish my novels for a while),
etc.;
nothing drives progress like total incompatibility;
there is nothing else motivating me,
and nothing else working,
and nothing else to do but complete my lifelong mega-spell.
I was bummed about not being able to find the vegan thanksgiving loaf kit in stores here like I once found in Montana,
but the GTFO Turkey Butternut Loaf I just got in the mail was WAY better!;
it all works out
finally a day of normal-ish looking ppl, and nice-enough conversations;
helping the nice foreign-accent hikers who seemed straight and polite, and who initiated,
and then the park truck new guy who initiated and was nice –though asking where I lived and worked was a little inappropriate.
phase 2… :/
if only hot girls initiated and were kind and thankful like that :/
wtf.
whatever.
phase2.
the fat stupid ugly druggie oldfuck neighbors are gone!
someone else is moving in.
hopefully they are somewhat better.
either way, maybe the druggies died after all! finally!
…
as a matter of fact, the fatfuck neighbor ALSO left!
if only the deformed blobmonster druggie would ALSO leave…
and the fugtarded thing to the other side…
and the Other druggies…
but, even better, if only Iii could leave; back to the YC!; to my Dream-cabin there!
Amen!
Is poaching really bad?; they r just killing deformed violent retarded monsters. And crying over that Cecil lion? Why?; it is just a murder beast. Anyone who gets upset when monsters r killed…is a worse monster. Note how My campaign was only to stop polLution, Not to protect all Creatures.
“Isn’t that a shame?” No; the only shame is you; it is a shame you are retarded, and retardedly against other languages, and racist, and mad about one language gaining influence but not about Your language having Also forced its way into this area. It’s a shame that Your kind are here, not just theirs. It’s a shame you mindlessly regurgitate cartel lies causing deformities and genocide. It’s a shame you lie to me. It’s a shame you are insecure and breed with monsters. It’s a shame you forsook your oath. It’s a shame the language options on your shitty malfunctioning app don’t include the Native ones –whom your kind Also genocided. It’s a shame your employees are retards. It’s a shame your kind are wasting my many gifts by offering me only this pointless mindless job. It’s a shame your products are poison.
There is nothing wrong w seeking pleasure; pleasure indicates health. There is a Lot wrong w practicing only fighting; even martial arts masters manifest only bad events. They are focused and talented, yes, but also fools.
Even if ambi saw through time and planned this, and knew what would produce my best work, and stayed away to prevent distractions, and compelled/terrorized the hotties to be near me but not engage, …I can’t fully credit her until she confirms this, and I can’t trust her until she somehow shows me in person I can trust her, but I also can’t fully hate her, as she was ensuring Inisfree and her family alike came first. It could have been done better; they could have behaved, and the typist she used could have been polite and intelligent and not a fugtarded blobmonster disgrace asshope uninvited, …but at least all the exploring and designing got done.
Finally saw in the Fairfield. It is nice; classy. It may be the only nice bldg n all of this county. Can i fucking leave Madison for the YC now?
If i hadnt taken the shitty groc job, my grocery store design would not be nearly as detailed or complete.
The ppl still being weird/lame/dumb/gross is the ongoing sign that this phase/point is for learning and designing, not interacting. It is for using them and continuing on. So be it.
The longer I stayed at krogtard, the worse it got; worse behavior, worse music, worse pay issues, worse hours, worse coworkers, worse demands/OCD, worse new workers, worse vibes, and on and on.
Why is it that when someone asks for help, and I help, I still get screwed this hard?
I really was right to stop talking to fugs…
I should stop seeking jobs. No employer has ever treated me even REMOTELY well/right. I’ve been given only slave wages/offers for four decades… even though I studied and bettered myself that whole time.
whatever.
It was toxic as hell, and got worse, so I left. Money has always been tight. It’ll just be tight longer. Ugh. FML.
At least I don’t have to listen to their lies and scam recordings and rudeness and tantrums anymore.
At least I don’t have to be around all the masktards.
At least I don’t have to handle their shitty poison non-organic “food”.
I always survive. I will again/still.
I always find another gig.
Quitting never stopped me.
Staying never helped.
…
If only Ambi had shown up…
If only the new “doc” hadn’t been wrong/liar like the rest…
If only I was in the YC dream-cabin with my dream/soul-family…
…
At least I have learned not to waste time praying or believing in gods or having faith.
At least I have learned not to waste time applying for jobs or trying to “make things work”.
Being bored and lonely and stuck… is still better than being forced to go places, and being around scum, and traveling but only finding more assholes/idiots.
I guess I’m here for now / a bit.
fuck.
…
Maybe I’ve still been honoring the signs;
when there are signs to work, I work,
and when there are signs to move on, I move on.
It hasn’t been great/ideal/perfect yet, but it HAS worked…
…
and the “rains of relief” are back, right on queue/schedule/time, and for 3 days in a row this time.
…
maybe I was only supposed to work there long enough to survive and re-secure my site for 1 more year.
fine.
there were no more ideas coming to me from that place / for my store design, anyway; it was time to go.
I WOULD NORMALLY THANK the artists for all the amazing Jaina porn that really took the edge off for me yesterday,
but it was mixed in with the usual disgusting fail bullshit “art” of the degenerates, so I can’t be thankful –and shouldn’t be.
phase3 ONLY deserves gratitude.
phase1 deserves only rage and resistance, and phase2 deserves only disgust and ongoing rejection.
The consciousness-focus has Definitely shifted, and the feeling/sign is unmistakable;
I no longer want to isolate and work and pc-type at ALL;
I want to be out, meeting hotties, meeting the manifestations of my spells/dreams/heart/calling.
Almost 20 years, on and off, working on the Inisfree design/spell…
so hopefully the Next 20 years will be building up in-person relationships with all those hotties I naturally love/d.
and interesting… that this focus/shift… is right on time; it coincides Perfectly with the time ~13 years after The Shift; 2012/2013… to 2025/2026. It is the start of 2023; last 2 years of this… but wait!; the Mayan calendar wrapped up before the end of 2011; 2011+13 = 2024; so just 1 more year before a ~20-year period of goodness/unity/teamwork? I can last that long. I’ve lasted 39 with NO team so Far.
…plus, I always had to let go and wait a bit for my spells to manifest; I was told “no” by idiots about the Corps, then left for another state, and ended up in the Corps. I was delayed on many jobs and schools and relocations, but got them. I thought it impossible to travel, yet always got to, farther and farther. Then my characters/dream-girls started showing up almost everywhere, even though I didn’t think they were real. So… it stands to reason that letting go and waiting a bit… will allow/cause my Greatest spell/want to manifest; my life with Ambi in our Yellowstone Club cabin, and my work in Inisfree. Amen.
phase1: try and find unworthy/fake the false/made-up gods and goddesses
phase2: beCome a god; to finally get things done, and BY getting things done
phase3: all my dream-girls manifest, made goddesses/immortal/invincible, thanks to my choice to renounce the false/evil god/s
It isn’t easy, but this is the CLEAR trajectory so far.
I just got that unwelcome familiar / deja-vu-ish feeling about being in my vehicle scouting for birds for the Audobon Society here… ew. ugh. fml.
Did I try it in my Jeep years ago? Was I trying to be out… while avoiding the bad ppl/beings? Did I run low on gas or time or food? Did the loneliness waves hit me? Did I just IMAGINE doing that, and decide not to START?
I’ll just walk it with people this time…
fucking phase2.
At least I’m not attempting it in my gas-guzzling Jeep.
…
and at least there are other events I can get to…
and at least I am repacked…
and at least my consciousness-focus has shifted entirely to Ambi/family…
and at least the year here is over (and I always seem to only spend one year in each place, or less, no matter what, the relocation budget always somehow working out)…
and at least I know what I want…
and at least all my work/designing is finally done (minus a few clubs… which may be destined to be completed in Inisfree, anyway)…
and at least I stood my ground against all those evil scammers and rude morons and blameshifters and psychos/sociopaths…
…and at least I have some free chances to learn about trees and birds; more nature stuff.
so things are going okay, and TONS of progress was made, and I know this is the meh 2nd-pass; the rough (1st) is out of the way, and I’m getting the 2nd out of the way, so the 3rd (good/ideal) can come/occur.
…
I get the feeling I can maybe see upcoming events a little, as if I have a time-step/viewing ability…
but it could just be deja-vu from my brief stay in this state years ago. :/
idfk
I tried the Earthship thing, and ended up a couple months later in Oregon, and there she was after I left / gave up on the Earthship/s.
I tried Mexico for about half a year, then there she was when I returned.
I tried Eli/Cali for about half a year, then gave up and went to Escondido / Oceanside, and there she was.
It always seems after a couple/few seasons, and giving up / being forced to change course, she is there again.
Maybe now that I have been in Indiana a few seasons, and been forced to try and leave again, she will again be there –and this time to stay with me.
review what happened;
They asked for help, I took it as a sign and opportunity, I answered the call, and found they need help bc they treat their people as badly as it gets; they are literally spamming and condescending and murdering them.
I got the money I needed, but only BARELY; the pay was ABYSSMAL.
Only disgusting scum worked there.
They had ONE toiled for DOZENS of ppl, and it was often occupied, and the whole room ALWAYS stank.
Their breakroom stank and was a mess, and was full of poison, and they blasted the heat, and blasted lies and hideous things on the TV there.
They played AWFUL queer music and murder-scam ads ALL day.
The VAST majority of their products were ACTUAL POISON.
They missed paying me; my first TWO paychecks were LATE.
They ignored my availability, and scheduled me for nights ANYway.
Their app didn’t work.
My punches weren’t showing up.
They got RED with anger even when I did EVERYthing right, and was ALWAYS kind and calm; my behavior was NOT reciprocated –or even mirrored/mimicked.
Every last customer was disgusting.
There were mouthbreather masktards there EVERY HOUR.
Their eyes were black, their souls were black/absent, and their vibes/auras were black/shit. HORRIBLE feeling/vibes/creepiness.
I hated every minute there. I dreaded every return.
Thank the GODS (ME) I didn’t need the money; I just WANTed it.
(LAST time I was in this shit-hole fail-tard state, I DID need it –desperately.)
Anyway, my point is that there were a THOUSAND things wrong with that company/job, and the pay could NEVER justify ANY of them.
Any ONE of those experiences/wrongs was enough to warrant quitting.
I am HEROIC for having hung on as long as I DID.
If I had the MEANS, I would have walked out even from the ONBOARDING; even THERE, they showed hideous evil creatures, and promoted/endorsed/condoned disgusting deviant behavior/psychoses.
soooo glad I can always leave those hells.
soooo glad those scumbags are the ones stuck in them.
at least there is SOME justice there.
…
There was no worse job;
they literally spent ALL day EVERY day trying to convince you to do drugs and get murdered.
They were EXACTLY the same as that bully/psycho in Mexico.
They were even UGLIER than him, so they were worse.
They were more NUMEROUS than him, so THAT ALSO made them / the job here worse.
Nothing is worse than constant pressure to do drugs and die.
No pay justifies being associated with such monsters.
At least it is only the uglies who are ruining their health and killing themselves now.
but still…
There could be no worse job.
What happened here? Each time you tried to get work, it got worse;
it started with being lied to about a job, then denied it when you refused to join a death-cult,
then you finally GOT a job, and it was hell, and they were druggies and bullies and liars and murderers,
and then you finally got a NEW job, and it was even UGLIER, RUDER, more-CONSTANT evil than beFORE.
The sign there is pretty clear, IMO; it is to not seek or accept jobs anymore.
All I can do now is give the hotties more chances.
They have NEVER proven worthy, and AREN’T doing what I like/want/asked for, but they are all that’s left.
I can’t yet seem to manifest the reality of my dream-life on my own… :/
fucking phase2.
only the loose whore scammer ever complained; all other girls were fine with me, dick, height and all.
Ambi showed up at least a few times,
and I was always poor back then,
and in the same meh shape,
and my poorness and height and color and fitness and dick and other issues didn’t matter to her;
she, a physically-perfect woman, was interested.
The vibe was clear, unmistakable.
So since all those things I worried about… didn’t stop her from showing up and being interested…
she may show up again.
Is it just to feed/drink blood? I didn’t get that feeling.
It could be because she needs/wants me as much as I need/want her, and for the same reasons; love, family, comfort at night, etc..
I sure would accept and give that to her if she returns.
and her typist made it clear she was spying on me,
so maybe she is monitoring even this…
and in-person her made it clear all she wants is a hello/initiation, just like Iii want/ed, so our interests seem aligned, at least there.
Everything that moron ‘doc’ said proved untrue, if not also a lie;
1) getting south of Mexico City didn’t make things much/any better,
2) there were no ships waiting/available at the coasts,
3) my family WASN’T out there (bc they would have MET me halfWAY if they WERE),
4) Ambi ISN’T “always there”; she has literally NEVER been there/here for me, only blinking past like an asshole/coward/incompatible a few times,
5) she DIDN’T show up when I was ready for her; I was READY for her in 2010. TWENTY FUCKING TEN. TWELVE/+ YEARS ago.
So why the hell would I unblock him? Just to bitch? Just to fight? Just to give him another chance to hurt my emotional state with more of his lies/untruths/inaccuracies/idiocy?
FUCK him.
LEAVE that asshole blocked.
FUCK his lies.
that nepal/bhutan turd saying “never finish what you start/ed”… lol;
I finished every school,
every relocation,
every job,
every plan,
every site update,
every journal entry,
an entire novel,
multiple scale models, plus a computer model,
vehicle trades,
gear upgrades,
multiple games,
THOUSANDS of RPs,
my Discord server,
healing processes,
volunteer projects,
and on and on and on.
I finished things even OTHERS had started.
I finished and PERFECTED things even “GODS” had started.
2 nights in a row crying before sleep :/
I guess that is another “2”; phase2 sign.
it is over now.
phase3 comes soon.
Humanity was/is the cataclysm (evident in how they heartlessly uniformly uniformly caused cataclysms every time I interacted w them). They caused all the dumb, violent, hyperemotional animals and bugs. The ruins will only stop being ruins when the humans are removed.
If amb was serious and good and worthy and equal, she would have given me her contact info long ago, just as i gave mine, and she would let Me observe Her, just as She clearly was spying on Me. But she didnt/hasnt. If she was my equal, she wouldnt have shown up only after i was too exhausted, and she wouldnt have said idiotic things, or worn a retard mask like she would have known i hate.
Starfruit is like sweet celery. Persimmon is like an orange-flavored apple.
Interesting that the verizon gay data rate throttling bs…ended up being exactly how long i needed to complete the next groc pics and update folder. Things keep working out…
Kevin telling me he has 400k saved up…deja vu. Wtf.
memtag clonemod:
mon5dec2022 at krog madison:
~4:45pm almost ambi, hair, skin, height, outfit, but legs and ass and face were off. She hovered. Seemed or vibed like a check to confirm i would pursue. I feel good i did. And damn god to hell for teasing me like that. Fuck this world.
Is the flux still goin? I did a year of work stationary, so next should be a year of meeting and bonding w my favorite hotties, Ambi first. We’ll see.
As awful as things are, you always end up getting to move again, you had to quit another toxic job…but you have the Ability to; you Get to. And…Ambi answered your call. She even showed up a few times when you Hadnt called out for her. …and if your networking had worked, you still would have had to isolate to receive and build all those ideas, so …btr to not miss anyone; being lonely is btr than lonely bc you Have ppl. Anyway, wait for the means/portal/opportunity. The hotties will have to do. …and you got the rest you needed. And the worst of your wounds healed; panic attks, femur, gums, brain zaps, heart palps. And the ppl here r as ugly and stinky and dumb as elsewhere, bit u havent had to deal w them like n yrs past. Your site is secure. You even got to try a big box of vegan, and most of it is great. Now u can focus entirely on ambi, so hopefully she will feel that and return.
If u had stayed at that shit job, it only would have manifested more gross evil they want, and other cocktease not-Ambis.
It is fine and natural to be upset u r still resorting to porn, but be glad you have the Means to, and that u Get to without inteRuption.
Things havent gotten btr here n a year, except that u arent n your car. The landlady and others should have offered to fuck you. The job should have not been a liem. Your pay should have gone up. So since things didnt get btr, except for all the work you got caught up and wrapped up, it is time and sign to go. Amen.
Your sex drive is still healthily high; 4/+ x/day.
Focusing on ambi and the yc is not a longshot; solo to patagonia was a longshot. This is easy by comparison.
Best jaina porn of my life! I am really impressed and pleased w it. Totally wmkm material. And perfect to manifest her personality compatible with me/mine.
Focusing only worked for Me; it never worked on others in phase1; they stayed evil. In phase2, it seemed to summon them once a year or so, but it still did not influence them beyond that. Does it now in phase3 get me all i want?
I didnt really want to go to patagonia alone, so i got turned back; i got what i wanted or needed more.
I wanted ambi to show up this whole past year, but i slightly wanted to wrap up all my work first, and got to.
Then i needed a job to renew my site for a year, and got that.
I would have rather had ambi team up and cover that, or show me our home…so i can use my rent money for my site renewal, but she didnt come.
Now all i want is her and our yc home, so hopefully that will manifest.
I won’t attempt any more temp jobs, as those were more of a want than a need, and bc they felt like panicking and shifting focus.
Will she love me in spite of my gut?
Will i manifest only pt until i have abs back, Then her?
I would rather leave Now w her…and do abs in the yc.
She made it clear she was spying on me…so maybe she is reading these notes, not just listening in.
I’ll nvr understand why the bitches drew such a hard and uniform line in the sand; why refuse to talk? Why show up and seem to he answering my call, then refuse to be engaging like i asked? I have thought/considered that maybe it was to give me space and time for this last wave of ideas and work, but still; it still bothers me how they all behaved… It was phase2 tho; neutral across the board, just like phase1 was default evil across the board. Maybe they can only behave based on the phase…just like how they say the moon rules them.
In phase1, wanting ambi wasnt enough to manifest her.
In phase2, it got only texts and a few walkbys.
As phase3 approaches, have i held that focus on her long enough that she will return and stay, not needing me to hold a vision of her or call out to her further? I sure hope so. I want her here, with me, stable, and in my arms every night. Amen.
Phase2, quit 2 jobs n a row lol. Nice that i could and honorable that i did. I always choose the good side. I always reject evil.
I was right to take out only what was needed. They should have thanked me for that. They got red angry.
A job that fucked up, that made me dread going every day, and that made me rage and cry, HAS to be left. Sanity and health and dignity have to keep being first. Amen.
Try not wanking; let the need energy build up. Same w work; try not jobseeking, as that builds up the energy for a team. And from now on always go for every hottie, as it Never worked when going for normal/fugs/jobs or even school.
No matter how tight funds r at the moment, u r better off than a wild animal. Sure, most humans r as dumb as wild animals around here, but u have walls and such, and tech, and heroic feats to boot.
Note that my desire to do site work…and put up w krog evil…ended at the same time; th year-long ideas/work phase is done; time for the manifestation/application/movement flux again.
Even if she was a govt spy or handler, i want the real her i saw, and i dont want to keep doing gd site updates anymore. I want a fam w her. I want her as my stability.
First big/good cry in…months? Since mex? I’ve been strong long enough. I want my wife. I want Ambi. Every day and every night.
Surely…after devoted writing and wishing for decades…I will get to be with Ambi and all my dream-ppl as much as I have been alone these past 10 or so years. Surely.
That vegan empanada dinner was great. The vegan chicken breast salad lunch I made was great, too. I am glad I found those.
Sooooo glad i had the strength and courage and honor to quit that toxic retarded hell.
I feel sooo much btr now, having walked out.
Be honest w ppl; u r Not ok, and u r praying for the means to get back to your home in Montana.
I came this way for a writing job that didnt work out, and then tried to meet up with a friend who wasnt here. Now i feel stuck and want only to be home with my love for our first Christmas.
…
Don’t b like the discord spazzes; wait and let the means/portal come.
3 jobs awful; fake 36k cemetary, asylum habitat druggies, and krog genocide racist deformed… Very clear signs i cannot stay here and should not attempt work yet.
3 days rain in a row…
3rd time to inn concert…
3rd time crying hard for ambi…
3rd time daring to pray to god…
Many 3s.
1st time seeing a mini rainbow in my mind’s eye after admitting i was broken and losing it.
…
And hopefully the 3rd and final rd of moving bk to mt.
A cry and sleep at a good time made me feel btr again.
Rmbr: ppl were just as shitty everywhere out there, and the food as bad, and the prices as insane, so stay put and focus on manifesting. When u move/travel, it forces you to focus on manifesting places to stay. She still appeared once in a while, but you can’t afford another jump without her. She’ll just have to show up here this time.
You have fitness and novels completing to pass the time, anyway.
tue6dec2022.
Everything lined up to make me quit today; every gross person, more gross ppl, another idiot tantrum from the fugfucker dept mgr, bad music, lies ads, toilet occupied, upcoming kevintard same shift, masktard muffled talking, etc.; it was as if the univ was giving me a hundred signs n a row to leave…and even though that keeps my budget tight for now, it would have stayed tight and i would have kept going insane if i’d tried to make that todic job work. Btr to move on and let a btr opportunity manifest. Replacements r btr.
Wed7dec2022.
7pm main dntn madison loop walk. 5 almost Ambi’s, starting w 3 at corner who walked to where i parked. : ( ouch. 6th; 7:21pm at white corner house 501 Elm and Main, walking west up to its porch. But she always walks to me and vibes as her. They didnt. Do i take it as a good sign there were so many, so close, on my very first outing?
No deja vu on any of them.
Ambi always showed up when i was driving…and transitioning, Not when i was staying anywhere. Do i need to hit the road again?
The last time I left Indiana (2015, perhaps after resorting to it after Louisiana), I got the Grand Canyon and 30k, Hawaii, Europe, Alaska, etc.. And I already got offered the Canyon again, …so…maybe this time…I will get even more; 300k? The YC. Wait for it.
As much as i hate being around junkies (vaxtards), i have been around them for decades with only negligible ails, and been forced to Be one…yet still been a genius and strong Marine, etc., so…i have every reason to remain confident i shall continue working wonders and improving my health. Amen.
As much as i want ambi w me, there r still a few final social media and website updates to do, and exercise, etc.. I am glad i prepacked, though. I am glad i have no options/leads to “bounce”, in a way; it feels better to stay put a bit, even here, than to risk another awful trip or awful roommate/landlord/place.
Even though the bitch dangled herself and abandoned me here, i still got tons done, and have new wonders to show for it. Even though the gods keep not doing their part, i still made ends meet. Even though my best wasnt enough for all the fuckbags i met during my travels so far, i still dared to go and be myself time and again. Last time i was here, it was barely 3 yrs into committing to my life’s work, so it was somewhat understandable a calibration was still going on. This time, it is a decade into my committing, so… Not as understandable. But ideas kept coming that whole time, so my spellcrafting had to keep going, and maybe that means calibrations kept going. Did it really take this long to unfuck the minds of the hotties? and to lay in my chosen future?
In 2015, there were only 8 books n my series, and the old website was still up; WebStarts. It took these past several years to complete all i now have, such as the round-ones of all the realms and first-contacts / manifestations.
For that, i am kinda okay w the hotties not yet behaving/aligning to me; i got the solo time i needed to finish/complete my idea/s.
Still finding things worth touching up w new details in my Inisfree computer model after a Year; it was good to be forced to take that much time on it before ppl came for tours and donations. Donations Always empower me to evacuate from such monklike situations.
Wayne giving advice instd of donations, and telling me to do this or do that, is still phase1 negativity; pressure to change, not support for the genius hero i am.
“Brother, you’ve gotta…”; wrong, Wayne; YOU, Wayne, have gotta do things differently; YOU have gotta see my worth and DONATE. THAT is how it is SUPPOSED to work; I already DID all the online stuff u advised; YOU ppl need to respond w SUPPORT.
Before, I wept in want of her. Let this time be without weeping, for it is rd2, and better that way, and she has no value worth weeping over until she is here. Also before, i left shitty places in search of btr, only to find the same evil/shitty conditions/mindset/NPCs everywhere; this time, though still shitty, stay and rest, learning to win battles by ignoring the shittiness. Be glad that i have now witnessed she and others are real; in 2015 and before, they had not yet manifested, or at least not then revealed their realness to me.
If you had accepted the typist, u would have Remained w that old fat stupid bitch bitching. If you had accepted lazy heartless dangling in-person ambi, she would have Always dangled and tested and left you until more nervous breakdowns occurred. Keep quitting/leaving the toxic lazy losers; you deserve better. Period. And even being alone is btr than being w uneducated cunts who have no manners or class or work ethic or loyalty or timing or use.
Even the slow-internet verizon-bs times each month helps me realize songs and other things go great in additional places in Inisfree;
it keeps all working out.
maybe the slow time (between hotties) is good, too –for now.
If I had kept initiating…
I might have gotten decent results,
but it was still phase2,
and even decent results… are NOT what I set out for,
and they would NOT have been what I ASKED for and deserve.
I MUST learn to stop second-guessing my decision/s all those years.
I MUST reMember that when I DID cave to ppl, …they ALWAYS treated me badly, not at ALL how I wanted or deserve.
IDK how I will make it out of this/here (Indy), but I Always make it out of places…
The ONLY 3 reasons I stayed put here (Indy) are:
1) the idiot who was wrong about a LOT (but also RIGHT about a lot) TOLD me to,
2) the money wasn’t enough to keep moving/relocating,
and 3) I got a TON of GREAT and NECESSARY work/visions/updates/builds done.
…
but now the builds are done,
and real-Ambi isn’t here,
and contact was terminated permanently with the abusive idiot typist,
and my lease is up,
so… there is no more reason to stay.
What do I do?
I HATE waiting on signs.
I HATE waiting on good ppl; they never come…
how can I have faith that things will work out, when they NEVER have?
and when I NEVER healed –like my healthy diet and lifestyle SHOULD have resulted in.
…
all I can do now is keep going to events I hate…
and hoping decent ppl will FINALLY connect w and support me…
Who will go with me to Montana?
How I wish it was Her…
but she hasn’t answered my call in … a year… or more now
wtf.
I’m really hating her now.
This bullshit/negligence/silence has gone on WAY too long…
No matter how great and perfect all my builds/accomplishments are during 2022,
I still am mad I do not yet have my dream-family with Ambi.
I still am mad I am not flying every weekday to and from Inisfree.
Why has the design phase taken TEN YEARS???
I should have known that sharing love with beautiful girls would not happen in phase 1 or 2;
it was banned in phase 1, and I only met crazies during my travels throughout phase 2
wtf.
As useful as Minecraft was to make Inisfree,
and as useful as Creativerse was to make Persephone,
and even as interesting as EVE Online was to play,
they have their limitations,
and the ppl playing them are scum,
and I am SICK of spending my DAYS/NIGHTS PLAYING them/games.
I WANT MY FAMILY NOW!! NOW!!!
I’m glad I didn’t end up uploading that first draft of the Grocery Store layout/map/design I made this month;
it went through a DOZEN or MORE reVISIONS; I would have had to re-upload its new versions/drafts so many times.
Things are working out.
I just don’t like where I’m living…
I didn’t like that Ambi drove by when I went to Butte,
and then she showed up in that Oregon bar I drove to with the Mike weirdo.
I didn’t like that she was with her guy/brother/lookalike/twin there,
and then she showed up by herself in that AZ motel lobby/checkin room.
I didn’t like what she said there, or the masktardation, or the fatfuck at the checkin desk,
and then she showed up by herself outside with no one else around –at least within view.
I didn’t like that she just stood there without introducing herself,
so… is she going to once again return and try/do better for me?
I guess all I can do is fucking wait and see,
since going out doesn’t seem to trigger her return,
and since she hasn’t given me her real phone number or location.
>:(
my focus didn’t improve the world;
I stayed focused on what I love for YEARS, DECADES even,
yet the others so far have stayed just as bad, even getting WORSE; the masktardation.
how can I feel ANY attraction to girls at this point, after how they all behaved?
they were PSYCHOS.
every last place I went, they behaved insanely.
how can I feel ANY attraction ANYwhere, when every last place I went… was based on murder, lies, abuse, …??
Is this really the end?
Why was my love not reciprocated?
Why was my hard work not reciprocated?
Why was I not donated to?
Why do I still only have enough to barely survive?
Is it “so bad” that I am again alone for a holiday of a religion that is fake, and which I do not participate, nor even condone?;
surely it is GOOD that I have this time without ANY distraction, having always used it well, and so many ACTUAL wonders (such as the PERFECT 3D model of Inisfree; capital of Heaven on Earth) DUE PRECISELY to my alone times.
It must be a sign that the ppl aren’t ready/worthy yet.
If I am again alone this latest holiday/Christmas, whatever. I’ll make do, just like I have for now 39-40 years.
They can’t hold the vision with you… until the vision is complete,
and the only way to complete it… is by YOU SAYING what it is,
and the only way for you to KNOW what it is… is to be distractions free…
until now; it is complete; final updates/uploads happening.
The ones who ARE for me (ARE worthy of me) will interpret me correctly;
they will see my walkbys as POLITE, NOT rude,
and my INTENTIONS as MATTERING, NOT not mattering,
and my website as BRILLIANT, NOT bad in ANY way,
and me based on LOVE, which I AM,
etc.
and they’ll LIKE the way I look, just as much as I liked the HOTTIES’ looks.
It is weird how i used to Want tough trng and deployments…and now all i want is Ambi and our family. : /
It took a while for the Corps to work out / manifest…
Then it took a while to manifest leaving it.
Jobs took a while.
Getting bk into schools took a while.
Each move took multiple attempts and a while.
God, how I hope the same is true w Ambi; we have done our multiple first attempts, and waited a while, so surely she will unite w me, too.
Bobevans. Blobs replaced by shorties after a year. Not at all good, but way btr than the blob ogre. Little blips of improvement. Now where r those i chose? I’m ready to focus on my loves.
Her saying the phone signal was going in and out…made me wonder if the hotties were getting tyat telpathically, thus their bad behavior
The job sucks, but i didnt have to work for a full year…and i basically just chill…and literally chill
You were right to pause the novels editing and keep them published by Your company in Inisfree; humans would have abused their fake legal system against you/the series.
As soon as you finally get what you want and asked for…all growing stops; you will be happy, content, etc. Just a thought. I am ready.
Better to be honest w natural feelings/emotions…than to force/fake happy/content. Better to war against scum than to pretend any peace exists.
I wonder if the hotties hate something about themselves as much as i hate my body/issues…
This shitty breakroom reminds me of the shitty breakrooms during deployments. At least there are no retarded jarheads here, but the blobs are almost as bad. At least they rarely talk.
The lingering shittiness of things…has resulted in 1) my true colors of the perfect work ethic showing again, and 2) me reviewing my work over and over, spotting and resolving every last little detail. It works out.
And whether my spells are really manifesting things, they needed saying, and i am glad and proud i chose to ignore the bullies and trust myself. Go, me. Amen.
I never missed any opportunities; i siezed so many, and they all turned out to be abusive fake offers; the corps, colleges, girls, vehicles, trips, the cruise w sickness, the canyon w hyperemotionals and sickness, etc.. And if i Had siezed the chances to talk to the extra hotties, i would not be taking opportunities, but bending and changing; they didnt want Me; they wanted me to Change, to Chase them, to be Happy with them even when they did the Opposite of what i asked for. I asked for manners; they didnt show any. I asked for them to confirm their beauty; they kept their clothes on. I asked just for Them; they showed up w Others. I asked for them to be engaging, initiating; they refused every time. I asked for compatiBility; they were Not. I asked for them to return together; they didnt return at All. I put all my info out there, being myself and transparent and easily accessible; they didnt do any of that at all. I wasnt being given opportunities; those manifestations were toeturous and insults and traps and lame unnecessary tests. They always wanted not me, but change and money and to breed the wrong way. Thus i know i never missed opportunities at all; THEY did; iii was willing to be Good to them, LOVING, and they wore me out, ruining Their chances.
They confirmed they are spending resources to spy on me, thus not spending those on helping me, and thus not doing what i asked for or approved of. If they were fair and good, they would let Me spy on Them right back, and spend their Funds on funding Me, Helping me so i Didn’t have to resort to extremes to survive. But they didn’t. Only heartless evil losers do that.
Every time i hate ambi, i have another idea and am glad she is not here to distract, and i consider she may have overcome her Own frustration, wanting to be w me, and worrying, and missing me, and hating Me at times, but prioritizing me and my life’s work, seeing through time that it would eventually prove her devotion and understanding and gifts and worth… Amen.
fri9dec2022
Nice to see the hot tan blonde shorty milf…and be called honey by her. With the blonde angel doll in there, it makes me think of my wives Divinity and Zerachiel, etc. -tanning place
Pc fb unblock dan morse? Ask why taking months? No; fool me once (“mex coast / argentina fam lie”), shame on you, but fool me twice (“she is always there and coming soon”), shame on me. IOW: Only IF ambi returns -SOON-, and unites forever w me, shall i unblock doc.
RealAmbi can never hold it against me for not initiating when she showed up; because She made me wait Years, and Never initiated herSelf, and did not exchange info fairly like i did, and Chose not to be there for me, Spying on me, Knowing what i was going through. She has only herSelf to blame. I didn’t know it was her. She Knew it was me. And saying her husband wanted her there? We weren’t husband and wife yet. What a moron… What a heartless, negligent moron… Her horrible choices over the years make it easier for me now not to want or miss her. She never gave us a chance. Ugh. Yeah, i had tons of ideas to get and polish up, but she could have at least given me her real nbr, and kept me from going hungry all those times. That stupid “I aint sweet!” text sure was accurate lol; she was a negligent merciless bitch who never showed Any sweetness in person to me, at least not yet.
Infinite qbits and coins in Creativerse, not just infinite materials; a phase3 sign. And godmode didnt make it boring; i now feel Less frustrated, and More excited to build Many more things.
Now for IRL money and building-automaters to ve provided to me! Amen!
stop going out, hoping for nice events; they don’t exist yet; this is phase2; the WORK phase; the SPELLwriting phase.
in phase1, only staying IN, and being TORTURED existed; there was no going out.
in phase2, no matter where you went, you got to exPLORE and colLECT, and LEARN, and DESIGN, but NEVER engage/enjoy.
stop wasting your time and gas.
wait for the good to come to YOU; wait for phase3. it comes.
the trajectory/improvements and ALL SIGNS conFIRM this.
my website is my equivalent of that Hudgens “Beastly” movie loveletter, except to entire races and civilizations,
and their hotties have been answering, but not fully,
and when we go and encounter each other, sparks fly, and their vibe is clearly wanting me, but illness/diarrhea/whatever has always stopped us.
some of them were too tall, all were too quiet/shy/unengaging, etc.,
but it’s a start; they can now read and sense my intention; that i love and lust for them, and elevate them to goddesshood if only they will likewise worship me as their god.
my only “Merry Christmas” so far has come from the smokin’-hot Julie of Aus 
<3
soooo happy about that!
very good sign.
still phase2 ugh; she isn’t here and making love w me, but it’s a big improvement from the creeps wishing Merry Christmas to me back when it was entirely based on murder-xian death-cult brainwashing/recruiting.
only-hotties wishing me well… is a very phase3 thing.
looks like I’ve blocked the right ones, and left in contact the right ones.
mon12dec2022, ~3pm, wally mad’: another almost-Ambi; correct height, black hair, straight and down and fanned out, but too old, and grumpy face, pushing cart directly to and past my left side.
seems like something keeps causing that general combination/”almost” to keep appearing MUCH more often now… which can be a very good sign; almost daily encounters,
ACTUAL daily encounters with ACTUAL (perfect) Ambi WILL be my norm in phase3.
The krog customer “doc” jacket was yet another fakedoc deathcult attentionwhore, but i shut him down on convo1, not after many aptmts like b4, or after years like w the 1st “doc”.
Irlj revs3. I no longer think i missed any opportunities; 1) that would be phase1 neg-based defaulting / mis-thinking, 2) it assumes there Were any opportunities, 3) every encounter i Did treat as a potential opportunity turned out to be more stalling or other abuse, 4) everything was clearly preset to be just rough training, and 5) the opportunity was Me; it was the Others who had opportunities to show/prove/introduce themselves to Me. And phase2 has clearly been just for passes/walkbys/calibrations; hotties clearly looking me way, parading themselves around me, showing up more alone and in better places, now ahead of schedule/anticipations, etc.. They never wanted to be friends when i tried. They never wanted to be normal lovers. Thus their passes Were the opportunities, and I took All those opportunities By traveling out to all those places. Every encounter was Also an opportunity for me to refuse to be a Beta/subMissive, and/so i Also succeeded at all Those; i made those encounters opportunities for Them to submit to Me (i.e. be Real females for me).
I started learning during phase1; I can start being w Ambi even before phase3. I certainly Want to. I have enough in order to keep making progress even if half my days/nights are now with her, my Inisfreeans, and the other hotties I chose.
How interesting/coincidental/aligned that I said Crossing the Abyss would be released in 2020, when I ended up meeting Ambi, Abyss/Darkness/Hel/Space Incarnate, and that I said USS TNH would be released in 2022, when I ended up starting its Minecraft build… and completing Persephone’s. I also said Mobile Home would be released in 2023, so does that mean/cause Inisfree and my resumed mobility / movement to my Yellowstone Club dreamhome? I sure hope so.
With the 51club builds, the final Gor reading, the Biblor’an subpg touchups, fitness, etc., I guess I don’t mind still being in this boring lonely aptmt a little while.
It occurs to me that maybe ambi and the others, at least n this 2nd phase, can only mirror me in their own ways; when i am wrapping things up, so are they, and we are both busy at the same time, and both doubting ourselves a bit, and both aching for each other, etc., only able to reunite and Stay united/together… when i am no longer focused on wrapping up my work/designing.
mon12dec2022.
Saw the black cat again this afternoon on way to wally ~2pm. Always makes me smile; bc it reminds me of my Sabrina. Then heard it at 9:19pm in front of the aptmt. <3 I miss her so.
Memtag clonemod:
Tue13dec2022.
7:07pm walkby tan brunette pre w fam of mother father y shorter younger brother, pink drab shirt. Reminded me of the fam i want; brunette elven wife, tan brunette sexy daughter… And i suppose that Was still a caliBration; shorter babe this time, younger, and almost my ambi fam; 2/3 of it; 4 ppl nstd of 6. Also, i suppose NO elf hottie showing up this time…is still the neutral 2nd pass; 1st was rough/unpleasant bc of her height and behavior, and this latest was just empty/disappointing/blank/boring, not as saddening/maddening. And wow that concert has 3x now been so bad lol.
Being free to go over my pgs again and again has made me feel Much btr about them…and surely made the spells perfect, or at least much closer to perfect. The manifested hotties living these word w me will take care of that. Amen.
The krog shorty v of the 2021 concert tan elf resting bitchface did not show up this time oh well. Just a bunch of hideous waddlemonsters again. Ugh. This phase really is only about writing/work, not good relationships or communities :/
Fugtard blobmonster druggie vikk2.0 at its door when i returned had a way of instabtly ending my sadness –by enraging me.
I HATED where i was this year…but all of a sudden…it is over; past, so much accomplished, the loneliness just a memory now. Gods, how i hope and pray 2023 means ambi marries me and stays with me nightly forevermore.
Seeing all these losers…is scary…bc i am here…but it was like this Everywhere i went, plus i am n Way btr mental and phys shape than them.
– Hearing joseph has a horrible home life…reminds me being alone and lonely is Way btr.
– seeing all the vids of crashes and animal attks…reminds me things r Way easier for me rn.
– as hopeless as things seem, i am getting Tons done every Day…
Working on Creativerse clubs IS novel3 work.
Working on creativerse perseph IS novel8 work.
Working on site bibloran subpgs IS novel11 work.
Working on the site in Any way IS novel13work.
Making Any phone note or irlj entry IS novel12 work.
I keep thinking that… I was Always on the right track; always trying things, always being good, always giving chances, always leaving evil, always making progress, always living like a monk…
All those ppl treated me so awfully, and blamed me for what they did;
it seems isolating was Bound to happen, whether i chose it or not.
Giving up on their kind has saved me so much heartache and money and time.
As “stuck” as i am, i can still afford to go Anywhere in the u.s. –I just don’t know how to get into a decent place once i get there : (
Fucking phase2.
I keep thinking of playing my completed Creativerse and Minecraft w my wonderful 4 children w Ambi when they are old enough : )
As lonely and scary as it is here, it was a BILLION times worse before; w jls, ame, the corps, childhood. IOW: things have gotten WAY btr.
More uniform signs i am not yet meant to connect/interact/team up:
My website contact form stopped working.
I can’t find the way to update my phone number anymore on my Home pg.
Every outings is more worthless fugmonsters.
Ambi and the other hotties have not returned or even phoned me.
I didnt just defeat the repo scam 3x (escondido, then 2 door knocks here); i reigned victorious over them Thousands of times in a row, and Every time; i always got out in time, and sensed who and what to ignore, and even found a way to prevent their harassment, not just block it.
Thousands of wise victories like that, and remaining undefeated, makes me a champion.
Having done it on my own also makes me a lone warrior and superhero.
Waking up to the rain before even predawn… It sounds so soothing and wonderful.
Having the freedom to just lie in bed and feel good and right…is worlds btr than all the times losers angrily pressured or forced me to jump out of bed and hurry for them.
This is not weakness now (me relaxing), but strength and reward.
The inn concert in 2015 and 2021 incl that bitch being not what i asked for, and viving neg to me.
This time… it was just neutral; no bitch came, and none stormed by me.
They were ALL not what i asked for, but the pointed-vibe bitch didnt even try this time. That makes this 3rd time…still an improvement.
I found only ppl i did not like, and who did not like me, thus i succeeded in taking only the real opportunities; all i sensed Was right for me; all i exTracted.
Having finally wrapped up the TOCs for Room Types and Biblor’an is another huge next step completed well. Amen.
I don’t kneel for lame or fake gods. Even the real deities should and will kneel for Me. Amen.
Another inappropriate email, this time cox saying they are handing over my acct to yet another nigger lapdog collections group, is yet another clear sign the humans are still fools, still bullies, still heartless, still overcharging me, still breaking the real laws, still rejecting the real god, and so on, only deserving of further purge.
I havent even Had cox or Any internet in over THREE YEARS. Plus i owe the humans NOTHING. THEY owe Me EVERYTHING.
The fake ‘rents are ~70 and ~75 now; soon they will finish ending themselves, so that will be 2 more great victories and reliefs; that much less pure evil on this world.
Nearly half a century now, i have stood successfully against all their bullying, lies, insults, gang/cult, and pointless pressure/attempts. Go, me.
I tried dozens of new products at krog. Only didnt end up trying the pomelo; 99% success, then. I’ll try the pomelo in time.
Every trip and school i took, and every diet and product tried, and every day i devoted to making my holy design, and every instinct i trusted, and every exercise i did, and every moment i chose to be Gorean/masculine/mySelf, were COUNTLESS opportunities i Did take And Benefit from.
Every time i Talked to ppl… proved fruitless.
Obviously that means ppl are Not opportunities; they are stalling/useless.
They are cannon fodder.
As so often, doc was wrong/lying –and defaulting to the negative, his primitive/weak mind so completely controlled by phase1;
travel is NOT foolish, but brave, awesome, healing, inspiring, and so much more.
If he was WISE, he WOULD have said “It doesn’t Matter where you go or what you do; you are right, and will learn and grow, and find great things, and MAKE great things.”
It would only be if I DIDN’T instinctively wish death upon the evildoers… that I would be unstable, bad, or worth monitoring. Thank the GODS I have had the instincts and strength/bravery to always default to removing evil in totality. Nothing else ever worked, and I did try everything, always hoping and striving for peace.
51 night-clubs outlined, portals linked, and so many other builds started : )
It has been a lonely and disgusting year, but also an EXTREMELY productive one, wrapping up literally EVERYTHING this time.
Amen.
thu15dec2022
pointless Creativerse saucer builds for Inisfree Spaceways? no; the very first one just helped me realize I need a better suite-numbering system… bc some have multiple floors, so the “count the rings from center, then out” only partially works.
It is nice to think of every cool and cold breeze as literally Ambi balancing me.
It occurs to me maybe she does not contact or stay w me…bc she is stepping frwd thru time to when we can be a family…but i want that Now.
Last time i had to leave and return to abusers hell, but launched from it many times. This time…i dont have to go through that again, but i cannot afford to leave without my beloved realAmbi.
Writing my spells/novels was the 1st pass/rd of those visions. Since they were largely written in phase2, they were shared from the start w the other writer/s. Uploading and rereading and linking them was the 2nd pass/rd. Living their perfected manifestations is the 3rd pass/rd of them, amen.
Fri16dec
Irlj 703pm ended up behind a firetrucks parade… Better than just being alone at a park staring at lights, but made me wonder if i ended up following the same parade n my jeep…and why my loves still aren’t with me :/ …aaaaand walking through that park made me barely rmbr doing it in 2015…n my greenlined gray shoes…and blue fleece back then, just as cold and dark and alone …and getting to the end of the sidewalk loop; seeing the xmaslights iceskating couple holding hands…once again made me get a lump n my throat and leave. I guess this time hurts less; it is a repeat, and familiar, and unsurprising, and i already lost all faith and hope, but still. TreeIDwalk tmrw. At least i can be moving and outside; that always takes the edge off. God, i hate this town. And realAmbi; all these yrs, she could have shown up or called, having been real.
I still wonder why the hell she and i spent a DECADE only texting… Why introduce me to ALL those ppl/”characters”, and why did the others do the same, only to have them all show up and be silent/rude/useless? For all the work i get wrapped up during these lull intervals, i sure do wonder and hate a lot :/
…
It all still vibes as / feels like interviews and calibrations, making sure they knew what i like before they show up…
but why end contact so rudely?
I suppose it was the only way to really signal completion of phase2, and to stop all interaction/updates…thereby allowing their manifestation.
Last time i was here (2015), i hadnt seen ambi yet, and hadnt wrapped up all my work, and i didnt have that doc guy telling me she would be returning soon; VERY good –SURPRISINGLY good; my characters are REAL– signs helping me not be depressed af this time.
…
Still, it is lonely af and worrisome af being back here. The only thing keeping me going/sane is how much work i wrap up each day, but eventually my last folders will be processed/empty… Then what?
…
2015 to the earthship friend drive to oregon (2017) was maybe 1yr long; ambi showed up a year after i had to give up on the shitty indiana place.
I’m pretty sure i saw her in mt, butte street rio walk in 2014 or 2015, but i am not sure. It could have instd been 2018 during lowe’s; where I saw her getting in a white car on that steep helena street near where doc had his shop…
I saw her in 2020 when i returned to usa.
I saw her in 2021 when i went to oceanside before escondido.
I saw a dozen almostHers in 2022; one by one all around indy,
then half a dozen in a single night right Here.
So it apparently took a little online RP to find her,
then 3-5 yrs before she started appearing and hurrying by,
then only 1 yr between closer appearances,
then multiple almosts in the same yr,
then n the same Night multiple almosts (mad’ dec’ dntn),
so there is an increasing increase…
and its rate so far…suggests she is still a few months away…from being a common occurrence/member of my life. :/
…
The horrible past years are all past/passed now, feeling so quickly gone/done; i suppose this current rough time will soon be/feel that softened, too. How i want her to be w me…
…
I hate that all i am holding onto…is that history and hope; her increasing and nearing appearances/returns. But it is all i’ve got. Maybe she will earn my love and trust…as much as her absence and rude typist have earned my hate.
I can hope.
If she had been kind already, i would have missed her.
If she had given me her info, i would have delayed the completion of my wrapups; i would have texted and called her often.
If i knew where she was, i would have gone there and stayed, eating up 8-16hrs a day.
If inisfree and our yc cabin were manifested/mine already, i wouldnt have any time at All to wrap up all i have/did.
I hope that is the only reason she left me so alone and all…
Did she really choose not to introduce herself or keep in touch…bc she could see how long it would take me to wrap all things up, enabling me to be distractionsfree from Her/Us?
I sure hope so.
If it was anything else, i might understandably hate her for negligence.
No one i talked to had any sense or use, and many evilly tried relentlessly to corrupt or stall, so i faced the reality that starting conversations was fruitless.
In spite of studying my ass off for decades, and applying for jobs for months to even years, i was never offered one with any sort of fair pay, so there was no point in not being myself all the time; i never had an employer to mimic or fear.
Whether i talked or not, they didnt get or like it.
Whether i studied or not, i never got good jobs.
The typist was right about a few things, one of them being that i was going a little too fast, as i certainly always felt pressure to rp, and pressure to stop so my work could be caught up and manifest. If she was smart, and tricking me by saying many things she knew would alienate me, she totally stopped that excess speed; i even blocked her idiot cunt selfrighteous deathcult typist. And my wrapups sped up DRAMATICALLY ever since.
An entire YEAR of them, all day and all night.
Was that izzy and celeste boobsy in vegas during the eli exodus trng loop in 2019?
Sure seems like it could be their manifestations.
Planets orbiting is a lot like magnets staying tilted while in a circular supercooled superconductor track…
Going out didnt trigger her returns.
Being brave didnt.
Sometimes she was there when i was just walking w a friend, or when i was giving up and regrouping, or when i wasnt sad but just waiting on a place to stay.
She was also at that rock concert bar in oregon; when i was just driving around w a friend, not being brave Or looking for a place to stay.
So there seems to be no pattern…other than public places, day or night, regardless of my needs or focuses at the time.
I wonder if she requires others’ blood…And for me to write about her, or at least for Someone to give her energy/time/spells, perhaps always bound to others, her powers and life doomed…if she does not always get more.
Now that i Stopped writing w the typist, does that spell her possible fade/end?
What a thought…
Do all of the hotties miss Me as much as i miss Them?
Are all of Them wrapping things up like iii have been?
Will All of them be and stay w me Soon?
Doc was deadwrong about the mex coast claim, but that was his rd1 claim; maybe this 2nd claim of his will end up happening…
Fuck, i hate these alone and uncertain times between.
I can’t fully hate this latest pitstop town; everywhere had the same rudeness, same evils, same grossness, so it wouldnt feel any btr to be anywhere else.
Prettier ppl and places bk then would possibly only have distracted/slowed me, or made me feel Worse (by behaving as badly as anyone else).
The hike tmrw will make me feel btr.
So will more computer modeling and clearing out my last updates folders.
This is good; i have been freed for a year or more now to do the work i know matters, now without constant distractions/harassment (other than from the repo turds).
There have always been pests/greedy/rude and threats and unholy demands. The ones now are the mildest so far.
The threats are no longer of violence and torture and death and damnation, only more negligible credit lies.
I suppose i should be relieved and glad things have gotten so mild and disregardable.
I fucking hate having nothing to do but my work, but that gets it done the most quickly.
With only enough $ to survive, i can’t Go anywhere.
With no one behaving Sanely, and no Job offers, all i can do is rest and do this work.
Ugh.
At least it is finally getting done.
…
It built up for a decade or two, then suddenly got done in a year or so.
So did my mil experience; built up for years, then suddenly worked out.
Same w college; yrs studying, then suddenly was graduated.
Same w traveling; yrs wanting to, then suddenly all Over the place.
Same w cooking meals; i wait until hungry, and until the stove or oven heats, then boom; sudden food.
Same w deucing; buildup for hrs, then sudden bathroom moment.
Same w computer modeling ideas.
Same w trying games such as minecraft.
Same w reTurning to games; a year or so btwn uses, then WAY btr use/fun/success when they finally return.
Ambi is prob the same way; takes yrs to build up, then finally occurs. And takes more than one appearance before we click, just like i took w minecraft, creativerse, etc.
…
And hopefully since she took the Longest of those things, her longer buildup will result n a lifetime/eternity of blissful family togetherness between me and her –and the others i now have seen are real.
…
I can hope.
It still confuses me why the hotties clearly are intercepting me, being hot like i asked, but refusing to beHave like i asked. Why go to the trouble, only to do the opposite of what i asked?
Why chat and text and ask and learn and travel to me, only to then Not use what i explained?
Ambi Clearly was monitoring me, or at least sent to meet me, and clearly made herself look EXACTLY how i like/want/asked, …so why not be ALL i asked?
Why has it only been the Fugtards initiating, when i always asked for them Not to?
All the opportunities humans Wasted…by doing the opp of what is true and requested…
Smh
…
doc’s dumbass thought it would help if he lied to you, saying what he thought you’d want to hear, but lies are not what i want to hear, and getting s of mex city did not help, and ambi did not come soon. That asshole can stay blocked forever. He panic-liked spammed my posts, then panic-lied, giving false-hope. Shameful.
Every time ambi reappears, she gets sexier, closer, and says more, so…whether that is bc i am writing more spells to further define/manifest/shape/perfect her, or bc she is working on herself, or bc blkops keep sending hotties closer to my specifications, it is still a noticeable improvement every time. If she returns again, she will likely be perfect, attitude and all.
If i had gotten the hotties, all i thought up…would not have been thought up, and i would not have monklevel selfcontrol, and even having the dream fam…would have made all the work i completed take TEN times longer, if not more.
It is amazing how rapidly and indefinitely even flawless beauty has its value dropped to absolute zero when trust is betrayed and retarded attitude disorders were/are the norm. Before all the unthinkable behavior, it would have been Easy for Thousands of them to get yes-es from me. Now, it will take and cost them so much more; it requires effort from them now, and compassion toward me, and somehow making up for all the bad, being as good to me now…as their kind was bad. I don’t think they have it in them. They are still behaving like dumb monkeys.
I see the videos of the wild animals spending their lives suffering, starving, causing nightmarish ends to others, walking or hiding every day, and i suppose i should feel lucky i have tech and visions and progress and interested hotties, but i am so similar to those struggling nonhumans; i worry daily about food, i roamed endlessly so far, i suffer wounds that have not healed, and all the humans so far have been dumb wild animals making me feel truly alone.
In 2014, i screamed at washington lowe’s trng…and the sexiest blonde ever was in the parking garage booth; i hadnt called out for her. In 2015, i hadnt called out for ambi, yet she was on that steep helena street. In 2017 after the earthship, i hadnt called out for ambi, yet she walked in that bar. In 2020, i erupted in anger against her not being there for me, and there she was again; i had not called out to her; i had told her to hell. In 2021, i also had not called out for when i resorted to oceanside. Perhaps that is the theme of her appearances; Not when i ask, or when i am ready, and sometimes when i have my own place, sometimes when i do Not, … just…when she pleases. Butte, too; i had not called for her when she appeared up the street hill in front of me and rio. So ot isnt based on location, time of day, rich or poor area, my calling out or not, me angry or calm, me homeless or renting… : / In short, they have appeared at random, Not when i called Or needed… Maybe there is hope in that; it means i dont need to be ready, or feel a certain way, or pray, or leave yet.
I was the one who reached out since 2010, and made all my info public, and went out daily, calling out as often; doc revealed himself to be a demon fool and sexist when he claimed iii was the one who needed to be ready. Ambi so far has been skittish, quiet, shy, suspect, etc.; it was She who was not yet ready, not even saying it was her, while i had long since said it was me.
It has taken this long to get all the parts of my idea/vision/life’s work in full order; perhaps i should be grateful to myself for requiring manners, and rejecting all who chose not to have any, and grateful to ambi and the others for giving me this space/time. I remember how the typist/text said my children w ambi would form and grow sooner; perhaps that, too, will work out perfectly, they growing up w me before this coming decade is through. It certainly feels like the right time at last, even though i have wanted it for years now.
Thankfully i met enough “ppl”, and traveled enough, to know i was not missing out; whether i was working, or whether the idiots illegally locked down, every person and place out there was the same, equally stupid and disgusting.
I may as well have isolated and gamed from the start.
I may as well have been even wilder and rude; my best manners were still insanely reacted to and lied about.
Nothing was reciprocated.
Everything was turned into a pointless and costly fight.
The only thing all that talking and networking and sampling was good for… was showing me just how critical my Rapture Campaign and the 2313 event really are.
That time in the RP when the typist texted “that’s it?”; um, wow;
Iii should have been the one saying that; about having to RP instead of get it IRL!
“only spending time with my Ambi-fam on Sundays”… technically, during this Phase 2, at least, includes only working on their story/spells/webpages
It’s enough for now.
Hopefuly VERY soon it will be IRL / in-person with that obviously-real-Ambi who keeps showing up.
irlj/revs3:
Those who get retarded-angry about things I love and know are good? That is still in my favor; 1) they just exposed themselves as evildoers, and 2) it means they’ll never compete with me for the time/presence of those I love.
I keep getting the idea it was also real-Ambi at Rockwall, TX, when those 2 brutes/guards standing with her gave me the cockblock wild-eye. Was that even BEFORE 2010?
Maybe she has been inching closer to me all along… and ensuring I GET to complete my life’s work…
the guy giving me the ticket at the theater: “make sure you go in door #2” lmfao;
it is HE and HIS kind who need to make sure THEY take the 2nd/last chance iii am giving THEM.
Why does his kind always screw itself by condescending like that, saying/claiming the opposite of what is true?
And, really, I have given THOUSANDS of chances. TENS of thousands; this is –for THEM– “door #bajillion”.
more dej’ after watching Avatar2, but whatever.
“Queue the dej’.” has become my annoyed/whatever expression about this; there has been so much this past year. :/
avatar2 was more violence-based mindlessness and breeder-brainwashing/propaganda/programming.
so much mortality.
so many rampant/raging/blatant/retarded contradictions, such as “outcast for being a killer” –said by the people/beings who kill EVERY SINGLE DAY/MEAL. lmfao. smh.
still, it was at least a phase2 meh/okayish; it was nice to see another world, and fighting lame jarheads, and wiping out whalers, and communicating with whales, and whales kicking ass, etc.
I keep getting the idea that every single show I ever watched…
was soft-disclosure, and interviews, and tryouts;
them seeing who I liked, what I liked, etc.
…which makes me wonder why they never ONCE beHAVED how I CONSISTENTLY said I liked and require.
anyway, neat thought. neater if it is true. neatest if they actually do what I many times stated is what turns me on / impresses me.
being blackops or cia or whatever else does not impress me.
being ssp does not impress me.
MANNERS would impress me –bc that is something i have NEVER seen before.
avatar2 ending message saying “not running; this is where i make my stand”???
wtf; pointless; i have no family yet, no wife, no children, and no land worth fighting for.
i have no superhuman body yet.
plus i was never running; i was advancing, leaving behind useless toxic nobodies.
i was ALWAYS advancing toward my goals.
with all the amazing ideas, and just bc of the Inisfree Spaceways 6-saucers all-floors room-types and windows-options image/BMP it just occurred to me to make,
I am still barely fine with being here; so long as these great/worthy/perfect ideas/visions/steps are getting done.
soooo nice to have infinite claims, and be picking out properties all over the world, at least in ONE of the ‘worlds’ I am building in.
amen.
Avatar2 “protecting his family gives a man purpose”? Wrong; ANYthing gives ANYone purpose. Protecting something is just A purpose; ONE of the POSSIBLE purposes.
As lonely and worrisome and frustrating as it is here, not many ppl can take indefinite time off from jobs, and still get paid, and get to design their own fleet of commercial spacecraft. Not many have that selfdiscipline or vision, either, or the spatial skills necessary. I wish more than anything that I already had/have the family I wrote about on my website (the wives, children w Ambi, etc.), and I wonder if they have abandoned me, but at least I am using amazing tech, and fun tech, and free tech to make models/visions of great and worthy things.
Only ~150 formsakes left to choose; almost done! Wow! <3
Now That is a sign it is time for Inisfree.
There is no wisdom in what tards here in the latest amerifail town say; do not think maybe that ticketgiving guy was giving a secret message to you about “making sure to take door #2”; he coukdnt even form a sentence correctly; said 8pm instd of 8$. Plus, if he Was wise, he would have asked You for advice, and Paid you, Not charged u.
Why is it that everyone behaves badly, and all jobs r shit, and all my efforts to get a real job get ignored? Thank god/me i had such a longlasting idea and hobby; i would have gone completely insane by now if all i had were those decades of being ignored and left for dead.
Why was it not in my “cards” to have a decent job so far? I studied so much and proved myself beyond all others!
Before, i had hope/desire. Now, i know btr; after countless expeditions and attempts and opportunity taking, still to always only be treated the same awful way, i now see there never was hope at all. Whatever. I tried. All that learning and daring and kindbess and patience and consistency, yet i still ended up abandoned in this godawful shithole. This is why i now curse the gods, never praying to them again.
More dej; from resourcemfg this time. Did i start with that app last time (2015)? Ew.
…
I think i may have Tried there but been too depressed to return to start…
Part of me keeps saying “focus on the ppl now”, but it was Ppl who kept forcing me INTO this hell, and ppl who never Once treated me right. Not even close. Why focus on such an evil species anymore? How many times will they use my hope and love to re-burn me?
It sure has been kept impossible to save up or get a decent home without any real fam manifesting/rendezvousing yet : (
I guess all i can do now is get ready to die alone here in the latest hell. No one answered my call. Every last one sat on their asses and acted like heartless shits and idiots. I suppose it is good i at least rejected their uniform bs. At least i did not tolerate that evil any longer than i had to. At least i dumped every last rude dipshit.
…
Based on all experiences so far, idk whether to assume more shit is on the way, or more lazy hotties i might be able to finally hitch a ride with. Fk.
The hotties always eventually return, but so far have never behaved or been helpful…
Staying put in shitholes like this one is always such a hell, so lonely and worrisome and challenging, …but it sure is always btr than being w humanimals like i always was forced to before,
and this is phase2, after all; apparently can’t go straight from incompatible to compatible ppl; apparently i have to have this solo time as a transition.
I wonder if realAmbi actually has a valid excuse for leaving me this many times, and never reciprocating transparency…
It would have to be the most miraculous thing in history; it would have to be our dreamhome…and Inisfree complete/funding…and my health restored permanently…and more.
Ugh.
I hate these intervals and not knowing.
I wonder if she, if she sees through time, hates knowing as much… as I had Not knowing.
So glad i stopped praying long ago; i can only imagine how much More frustrating this decades-long letdown would have been if i’d thought prayer worked.
I wonder what will spur/guide me out of this hellhole This time…
I wish it was starting my ideal fam w realAmbi…
Blocking the alltalk and rude…didnt end my only venting options; it sent the clear msg that only polite ppl in person r acceptable. It forces Them to actually team Up, and Me to stop being adDicted to alltalk Stalling/clingers/users.
Why the hell wouldnt anyone behave or initiate or see the good in me or team up? I was ready all along.
I’m glad i was me and actually found the cure to my sickness, but why didnt being the real me and so good ever result in likeminded?
Why don’t they want to support me and my community as much as those before were ocd about spawning?
Did my experiment of letting others choose whether to initiate backfire…or did it spare me from a thousand more phase1 evildoers and phase2 useless types? I may never know, but i do know that everyone i Did initiate with…turned out to be useless and often rude, even dangerous and retarded. : /
I will always wish the ones i wanted…had stayed w me…
but i can’t blame myself after all the trying and wishing and studying and enduring i did.
If i am stuck here, at least i scouted as far as i could, and was myself, and tried my best, and was polite.
And i know all i accomplished in 2022 never would have even occurred to me, let alone been started and attempted and completed, if i’d had the distraction of a good life too soon.
But now i dont Want anymore projects; i want realAmbi : (
Life is cruel.
Showing me she is real multiple times, always leaving me, not even saying hello, was the cruelest thing she could have done.
Maybe she doesnt deserve my love.
Maybe no one does (since they all behaved as rudely as she did), …other than me.
Every time i talked to hotties, they werent having it. (Some Were interested, but they had things i was not attracted to; height, tagalongs, attitudes, etc.)
Or they wanted drugs or spawns. Every time i talked to the rich, they wouldnt hire me. I had no choice but to acquiesce to resorting to “going back” to prev jerks, and when i reSorted to them, they treated me badly aGain, or Worse. One could argue i was “going bk” when i tried churches again, or when i tried prayer again, or when i tried hospitals again, or when i gave veteran org’s more chsnces, but all that was Forced on me; i Never wanted to go bk to them. “Only forward, never bkwd” is just more regurgitated common sense, and doc was a shithead for regurgitating it, mindless. I have been trying to go frwd my WHOLE LIFE. since BOYHOOD. all i wonder is…when will i Get to? I was Forced to go bk to the States. And IN. I fought so hard against it.
I held on for rjh for 5 yrs. I held on for ambi for at least 10. But is she really Right for me?; she refused to reciprocate transprency that Whole time. NO man should be left to wait and wonder and struggle that long, even conSidering all the distractionsfree times my many ideas/projects benefitted from. She didnt even let me keep in Touch w the real her. She didnt even spare me the fugtarded Typist! I really can’t see how such heartless abandon…could ever be justified.
Why did so many things get so much better, perfect even (website, wrapups, vegan finds, groc design, perseph build, tnh model, inisfree spaceways, wild life, path of lust, jaina vids, phone love clips and pics vision spells, sabrina irl, and on and on), but still not my health or $ or dreamfam? I TRIED focusing on those still lacking. I TRIED talking so many Times… : ( Fuck!
I’ve heard me snore. It seems a trivial issue, but I really wish I slept silently. It was a nice daydream today, my daughter, Adaline, comforting me by telling me she has never heard it, and that if ever any of them Did…they would gently turn me on my side to help it stop without waking me.
“Did u think it would be easy?”; what a bullshit cunty condescending retarded heartless thing to text to me, ignoring all the feats and training i pulled off, my whole Life proving i know things aren’t easy, and that i work hard and cleverly through it all.
Of Course i didnt think it would be easy.
But it would have been a hell of a lot better if her dumbass had shown any support.
So glad i cut that toxic idiot off.
and not to mention my wisdom and devotion through hideous hells; my wisdom and awareness should have been Plenty apparent for her to Never text such rude dumbassery.
I never stopped caring; i just faced the reality that all behavior and other signs were saying one thing: humans are unworthy, rude, stupid, bkwd. At least so far.
I am very proud of my honest venting.
I am very proud of my bravery regarding sharing my journal.
I am very proud of my healthy diet.
I am very proud of my decades of amazing thinking and accomplishments.
I am very proud of sensing all idiocies, and of myself for my amazing selfcontrol over my primal urges.
I used to think i was weak. Now i see i am monklike and saintly.
The finest women/girls in each realm were clearly sent to parade themselves for me, available to me, but they all chose to behave the same illogical/wrong/heartless way.
I suppose that is the standard meh-mix for phase2.
No need to worry; I always end up getting to go back to places, even when funds are tight and it seems impossible,
and I always end up seeing better and better manifestations/returns/versions of the hotties I love.
They ignored my input and tried to force/pressure/scare me into copying them, so I ignored all of Them.
They reacted negatively to me, so I reacted negatively to them.
They wrote a bunch of laws and did not give me any say, so I wrote a bunch of laws and did not give Them any say.
They’ll apparently have to keep learning the hard way that I will always give them a taste of their own medicine, never budging, always doing the right thing, so the only way they’ll ever get out of the mess they made… is by finally behaving correctly to me –forever.
Note how this 2nd time in IN, and 2nd time contacting the mfg co., …did Not result in a drive or depression-on-site;
they didn’t even Have any opportunities in this city –and that’s another sure sign I am not meant/allowed to work/save just yet.
phase fucking 2.
at least I no longer HAVE to relocate and work; at least I can pause and stay even / “in the black”.
It’s a start.
…
Even with the deja-vu, and even if I really have somehow done all this before, it is still the right thing to do;
building these things, ironing out every last detail, and showing the world what their minds will then automatically help hold/manifest,
are all great ways I can continue making steps/progress toward my dream-community/realm/life.
Amen.
“you have to be polite when you meet them” –RETARD/HORSESHIT;
It wasn’t polite enough that I believed in them?
It wasn’t polite enough that I EMPTIED my savings to travel to THEIR lands to make it EASY on them to meet?
It wasn’t polite enough that I patiently waited for THEM to decide to make the first move/contact?
It wasn’t polite enough that I went in peace and left in peace?
It wasn’t polite enough that I did everything I could to express my interest and love?
It wasn’t polite enough that I minded my own business?
It wasn’t polite enough that I continued on my way when NONE of them stepped forward?
It wasn’t polite enough that Iii stayed polite even though -FOR DECADES- THEY chose NEVER to?
Any world like this should be razed to its core foundations for the rudeness I have endured all these years.
They have literally waged war against me, trying to kill me with spells and poisons and anything they could think of.
and I get told by that asshole retard cunt of a typist that Iii am the one who lacks manners. wtf.
soooo glad I blocked that lying sack of shit.
what a gaslighting/blameshifting retard.
Well, well, well, what a surprise; doc was dead-ass wrong again,
and that asshole who seems like the IRLv of ambi didn’t show… again.
I’m sick of her random appearances and refusal to introduce herself.
Back to another shit go-between.
Nothin new.
At least I got all my life’s work caught up, designs complete, uploads complete, PC sorting complete,
and all my ships/aircraft and clubs designed/perfected.
Having nothing to do in yet another failtard waypoint-town… sure does work wonders for wrapping everything up.
Having no sane ppl to talk to or hang out with sure does, too.
Maybe I should Thank her, then. lol
Maybe phase1 was them not existing, and me writing them into being,
and phase2 was my updates, and them appearing briefly, as I’d written; brief blurbs on webpages = brief 1st passes/walkbys,
and phase3 is when I stop writing them, thus they are able to appear.
(Perhaps ongoing writing of them… causes them to disappear to be updated.)
Maybe Ambi WILL be the key to manifesting Inisfree and our family;
maybe she IS that powerful,
and has waited this long… bc it is a lot easier to manifest something once/perfectly…
than to have to update it IRL after it is already solid/physical.
Either way, I want and deserve a damn good explanation for why it took 13 years;
I started wanting a family with her in 2010.
I am remembering waiting at that same fugly stripmall until 9am during 2015 winter after same issue; cold day, new hrs dif from google, call rep said wait til 9, and i got mad and left after 9:30.
So gross i am back here, but no one wanted to behave, and i followed my only intel/lead.
…
I guess that neg pass was phase1…even in phase2,
and this 2nd pass will still fizzle, but is less awful feeling now.
Still awful. Just less.
What faith and attraction i once had is now dead and gone, long gone; that many ppl behaving that badly no matter How well i behave? And for that long? No, thanks.
Can’t trust anyone yet, apparently.
All i have left of my attraction is to what looks and sounds good, and to what Would be acceptable/attractive if behaving; what i Like has Never faded or gone.
No dej on the new mpha, or the vegan stuff i just tried from wal.
That’s good.
It took these 13 yrs to get everything in order, all processed, online, spells ironed out, so do i Really fully hate those who kept quiet and out of the way/reach?
Until they return and stay, yes.
Why not.
Blocked ambitypist, doc, eli, rio, sf, all in basically the same year. Must have been the time to finally cut out the last of the toxic clingers from phase1 who never manifested anything good.
I am amazing for having tolerated their bs as long as i did.
Phase1 was me not even knowing i could call out to anyone but the fake god.
Phase2 was me trying calling out to others, and some answered, but they and their realms were disgusting / disgustingly rude.
Maybe phase3 is about no longer wishing or hoping or calling out, but just being. Not even waiting for things to get btr. Not searching for cures or trying to come up w my own. Just being.
It isn’t acceptable, though, so it must be the end of phase2.
Phase3 is about togetherness w the Right ppl; the Calibrated ‘calls’-answerers.
How long will i be in this shithole This time? (IN OR the USA)
Prob a good thing i dont have the spare gas/$ rn to keep searching for her/them; every time/place i’ve gone Out so far…hasnt worked. : /
I HATE working every day, even when it is all on my Own ideas/stuff. I want to be w those iii Love! Goddamnit!
You wondered how you would ever get out of the marblewood hell…
and the college station / bryan hell…
and the rosewood hell…
and on and on,
but you Always got out,
and now those hells are only easy memories,
and this one will be.
You’ll see.
You always get what you want.
It just takes longer than you wanted, most times.
You were Right to avoid the bitches as long as you did; they kept trying to control and breed and ruin you.
You prioritized self, respect, health, and your gift / calling / life’s work, just as Any wise man would.
A team is necessary now, even w your slightly extra passive$.
Let what you spellcrafted manifest and stay. Give them chances…even though none so far have deserved it.
Your pc work is wrapped up eNough, and it is time at long last.
Your exodus can finally be done.
Go home; to your Real/Soul home; to realAmbi and Inisfree when they come/return.
And Never travel solo again; Always wait for Faith Blakely and your other expedition teammates to be ready –such as Sabrina Spellman 2021socal irl. <3
You don’t have to be patient; they came whether you were calm or screaming, desperate or alright, but you should Wait for them, patient/frustrated or not, bc traveling w/o them SUCKED.
–
needed more food and saw a post about it,
went to get it,
didn’t bother checking the ingredients; bc I’ve been let down so much by unhealthy towns like this one,
but got home and found it was ALL VEGAN.
holy crap; FINALLY the gods got something right.
only took them FORTY YEARS.
–
I have decided to have ALL my emotions, not just rage;
I am grateful ambi and the others aren’t here yet,
and that they showed themselves to me even when I would get mad,
and before we could be together –or even talk;
some of them repeatedly showed me they are real; my wildest dreams are real and aware of me,
and they vibed and eyelocked so unmistakably.
They could have made me wait longer.
They could have whined for attention while I still had ideas yet to come.
They could have derailed me at times –like the scumbags so often did.
They instead kept their distance, giving me hope AND space; respect.
I didn’t see it as respect back then, but it is still, technically, a form of it.
I am both enraged and grateful. Interesting. Phase 2.
–
I remain proud to have published these bits of my venting over the years,
and my sexuality,
and all else;
it has shown me who the idiots are, and who are my natural real friends.
It has ‘ripped the band-aid off’ sooner; when it was so much easier to discover and bear.
getting accustomed to porn and quickies didn’t “ruin your socialization skills / ‘game’ “;
it got you used to what real men SHOULD be accustomed to; getting their way immediately, quickly, without complaints/whining/voting/settling/compromising,
i.e. being dominant, masculine, Gorean, in charge, respected, obeyed loyally/eagerly/instantly, etc.
(thus it STOPPED me from the pressure to TRY and waste time with ‘game’ –which is just another way the morons/demons/losers/idiots always tried to stall/distract/derail/disrespect/disobey)
–
while I did not like being limited by Minecraft and Creativerse,
they certainly were exactly what I needed; they made it so that everything is perfectly orderly, easily navigated, built more quickly than ever, without allowing too many little details (which, I’ve noticed, now manifest perfectly on their own, even better than the images/visions/spells I publish),
and they are FAR better than the drafting table, slide-ruler, and pencil I started with back in junior-high
(plus I know I’ll have the finest AutoCAD/3D-modeling software/technology in existence when the time is right; in Inisfree; soon, amen)
–
You should not want what’s not here, and you should not Care about anyone until they show up and behave/serve you.
Holding a vision to manifest things is fine/right, but craving and calling out for things which have not yet manifested/returned/answered/aligned to you is pointless/madness.
(and none have deserve it yet, anyway)
–
it keeps occurring to me that realAmbi, if she sees through time more than i do, is probably frustrated when iii get moody, not knowing what the future holds,
just as much as I get frustrated at Her for not Being here.
maybe it also frustrates her to know/see so much, while not being able/allowed to share/tell anyone.
then again, maybe she, being a goddess, Chose that path/ability/foresight, and Likes how it ‘tortures’/motivates/drives/spurs people.
–
Always note which people only care about what is offensive to OTHERS; instead of prioritizing what is offensive to ME.
(those who prioritize others, especially the always-wrong/evil/disgusting masses, are as phase1/evil/unfair/brainless/brainwashed as it gets)
–
before (in phase1), they baited you, always punishing you for anything you did, even when you followed all their rules. EVERYthing was about control –even attempted control of your mind –which they literally poisoned multiple times, trying to kill you when they realized they could not corrupt/control you.
then (in phase2), they always blue-balls-ed you, still a bait-and-switch, not necessarily Punishing you all the time for no reason, but always disrespecting you / faking you out, dangling things on a string, only to always take them back. it was still all about control/steering/enraging/spurring/fueling you, at least indirectly. the poisonings stopped, but the attempted control remained, at least in a pussy/GREATLY-watered-down way.
when the flawless-hotties return and stay, and when some such as realAmbi have children/families with you, it will be phase3; what you want –thus NOT about attempts at slowing/controlling you anymore; at That time, and foreverMore, spending Time with them, and starting YOUR family (the only corRect kind of family), will be about Them HELPING you; making More who Are aligned Fully to you, and helping you slow down when YOU want to, always only to ENJOY what you’ve 1) sensed is right/holy, 2) fought for, and 3) made.
LET them. Slow down WITH them –when they return and behave, fully supporting you in every way, clearly wholeheartedly holding and manifesting your vision with/FOR you.
Amen.
There will, I sense, soon come that time; when it IS right to slow down –and when NO one will dare be disrespectful by trying to TELL me to.
I will slow down when it is right for ME.
You Should not and CANnot slow down and enjoy what has manifested –until it RESONATES; until it is RIGHT; until it is COMPLETE.
–
like the lions on that giraffe in the video/documentary, holding on for hours, trying to kill it, I just keep going in spite of all the scumbags still extorting me, trying to end me with lies, drugs, debt, poverty, you name it.
just keep going and they’ll fall off, worn out, giving up.
they Always eventually fade away, failing/falling.
a couple more bad dreams;
having to take broc soup in a bag underwater to get to an uphill campsite,
then having to settle on chicken noodle soup since I ordered/had the broc soup too soon;
need-to-piss + money-worries in a dream.
2nd dream: nightmare about being stuck in a lame house with a gravel roundabout driveway, and crying/calling/screaming out a few times “Please!” for Ambi :/
all my attempts should have worked; being myself, being nice, being fit, being adventurous, recruiting, focus on nature, focus on health, investing, inventing, pioneering, startups, asking for only love, etc.,
so… why Didn’t they?
I mean, technically, they Did, just not eNough; not as much as I Hoped/Wanted; I esCaped a Ton of bad ppl/situations/places, and I reCovered Most of my health after they Poisoned me, and I Kept finding ways to do the holy life’s work, but…
I sure didn’t get wealthy.
I live like I’m wealthy and retired, but I’m nowhere Near the kind of ppl/comMunity I know I need and deserve.
lol the typist got her snowy christmas she’d whined for last year.
fucking phase2 delays.
what a strange war it has been; all the enemies pretending to be friends, smiling, as weaponless as me.
I’m not sorry at all for having a nervous breakdown after singlehandedly taking on and completing the greatest project in the history of the world.
gross; more deja-vu, this time from uploading pics of shower curtains to the mall pg…
and from the temporary internet-connection issue…
wtf.
even the minus-8-degrees whiteout blizzard today…
worked in my favor; I didn’t have to go out in it,
the place I thought of going was closed due to it, anyway,
and it reminded me of many more items to include in Inisfree’s mall, ski hotel, and gear factory
–
so weird, this duality; I simultaneously HATE god / the gods for still being alone,
yet am SO relieved and grateful I have gotten to be;
no need to work, socialize, tend a family yet, etc.;
all the time I need –and I HAVE needed it– to finish my website; greatest spell; visionboard; life’s-work.
thank GOD/S I’ve gotten this many years, even though they were so alone.
even my lingering bullshit ailments… have helped stop me from trying to enjoy that which I was too busy to enjoy even IF i was not annoyed by these ails.
it all worked out.
–
Another day of great selfdiscipline and work/progress; slept well, updated jorunal and notes etc., filled in more of my own airline/spaceline models hulls and other details, overhauled Mall pg to perfection, went through my emails, enjoyed some love-meditation/vids like healthily always, cooked for myself as always, exercised, avoided all the gross failtown stuff, listened to the sound of the rain, and so on.
No matter how nice i was, they were still rude.
No matter how honorable, they weren’t.
No matter how much i observed, studied, and listened, they refused.
No matter how hard i worked, they were lazy.
No matter how many i donated to, they didnt to me.
And no matter how
But one thing that Has improved… is that i used to get declined by nobody hotties in school, whereas since then i have declined Flawless hotties for decades.
Will their kind Ever learn/choose manners? Idk. But i Do know they keep getting hotter, orbiting me more, seeking my attn more.
Me declining so many…prob drives them all insane, so to speak, with interest.
It is just as john normal correctly explained in his Gor novels; choose not to feed or even pay attn to your females, from time to time, giving them no explanation, and watch them redouble their efforts, begging you for food and love and use.
Since being good had no effect,
and being bad never made anything worse,
I suppose it is kinda nice knowing i can do anything without consequence; i get the same horrible situation/treatment no matter which rules i follow, who i talk to, whether i talk, or where i go.
Interesting.
Was that Izzy who strode into krogfail at 8:57ish that one night? Sure would be perfect if she was –and returns to me –weekly.
It occurred to me that i never gave much thought to not having my own funds to get out of iraq both times; i just did the time and left when others made it possible.
Same with all other places, regardless of how many times i went.
Same is true here.
Twice out of iraq, around the world, free for me; leaving here this 2nd time is easier and certain.
When so many jobs chose pure evil, it only makes sense to ignore the fake debt scam…and just stay in as long as i can, working on the Good…just as all-day as the jobs chose to keep being evil.
Thankfully at least i have learned not to bother trying to teach or help anymore of these dumb humans.
“They don’t know it is you”? Horse shit! They vibed as knowing EXACTLY who i am, esPecially realAMBI. They knew –which makes their rudeness to me that much worse and inexcusable. They did the exact opposite of what i wanted, even though they somehow knew how to pinpoint me multiple times a piece around the world.
The only reason i am staying put a little while is bc i checked and every town and city is the same, every person/ality was the same, every outcome was the same, etc..
Relocating used to provide some hope, or the beLief things might be btr somewhere, but now all i have observed and concluded is that i get work done Anywhere, and here in the latest tardtown is as good and bad as anywhere.
Still blows my mind how illogical the typist was;
said she could not reply in as much detail/length as when i did regarding the telepathic-evil-laugh-and-culture-banning-decree-threat rp post, saying it wasnt fair to me …
yet didnt care at ALL about being fair w reSpect,
or being Present,
and realAmbi didnt care at all about beong fair w Contact info or reliaBility.
Such stupidity. Such mix-and-match nonsense.
I wrote about the Corps and it happened even though i was wounded and told no.
I wrote about travel and exploration, and it happened, even though i was kept poor.
I wrote about characters and they appeared, even though i was told they were fictional.
So when will my yc cabin and inisfree happen?
Do i really have to stop writing about them first?
I guess I will find out soon enough.
Hopefully each Part manifested, such as One inisfree bldg becoming real/constructed when i switched to updating aNother webpg.
Just as was explained by Robert Sepehr and others, I “stayed at 3rd base, holding off from a home run as long as possible”, so to speak, for decades now, resulting in creativity, drive, genius, and wonders.
I have always sensed that correct love and fam are right for me, though, and have only avoided having either in inappropriate places, such as the failtard usa.
Will realAmbi and my other spellcrafted wives and kajirae be powerful enough to make the usa our servant, and Inisfree real?
That, i know, is the only way having my own family will be appropriate, stable, sustainable, and holy.
However, i never needed sex rites to achieve genius; i was a genius from the start. The sex just helped me unwind and recharge/refresh, balancing me.
When humans consistently got that and all else deadwrong, literally, i, being a genius, found i could relieve/refresh mySelf btr than They could, at least during phase2.
In phase1, they prevented even me from having the space and peace to sexrites/relieve myself.
In phase2, they kept baiting me w rude almost-hotties, not actually answering my calls or respecting my normal nature/wishes.
Wisely, i waited for phase3; for manners and my Own community/godhood, amen, Not letting them tangle me into their generational selfcurse (i.e. breeding w their dumbasses, which would have created only more of the devastation and increasing chaos they always recklessly defaulted to and demanded).
Phase1: they showed me they are not my ppl, npr even conscious beings at all
Phase2: i made my Own ppl, ensuring my own will always be good –as iii define it
Phase3: the last of the bad/nonppl will be expelled back i to The Abyss once and for all, leaving me and My ppl to reign on the world/s forever, amen.
Also, i developed my Own sex rites, and keep auto sensing/knowing what is wrong or gibberish w the human ones.
In phase3, all my envisioned/foreseen/instinctive sexrites shall finally come to pass…and be the new and permanent norm. At least for me and My loved ones. Amen.
Lmfao only xians are braindead enough to call The Lightbringer “the prince of darkness”; polar opp yet again. Always a lie.
Not to mention demonizing darkness lol.
Their dumbasses keep trying to seduce and control and change and drug me, when the only thing i am attracted to is manners, which none of them Or their towns have ever Had. Lmfao. So pathetic of them. So retarded.
They keep sending hottie after hottie, changing only their looks or clothing, never Once changing how they behave and vibe. And never letting me confirm they actually Are fully hot; healthy; correctly formed.
I have even Told them Many times Exactly how to earn my interaction and teamwork, and they have ignored or refused that cheatsheet every time, making it clear they only care about being rude and evil, trying to change/corrupt, not actually interested in offering me anything good/holy/healthy at all.
Also note how they have refused to Heal me, and have always only Hurt me; that is the unmistakable clear sign of only/pure evil. Real/good ppl would have healed me for Free, or never let me get hurt at All, and Never pushed pharma, and Never let me suffer.
Another sign that humans so far are 1) not my ppl, and 2) pure evil? All my great posts on all platforms almost always getting zero to one responses, while the lamest and completely useless and disgusting content of others regularly gets Millions of likes and thousands of comments… although all that is fake/bots…
Hm.
Either way, very bad sign.
Or, at least, a clear and recurring sign/signal i am not yet w my/real/sane ppl.
2000-2001; ~10-11 yrs before The Shift, was when I started leaving that hell of a broken home and fake fam;
it is now 2023; ~10-11 yrs After The Shift; perhaps this is finally my time to get to Go to my Destined home; w realAmbi and the others I wrote spells about/for.
Amen.
I sure keep feeling like my time to travel alone and work alone is over.
We’ll see. : /
“What i would give”… to spend the next 20/+ yrs nightly in my dreamcabin w Ambi and our four… while daily commuting to Inisfree for my dreamjob. It must and shall be. Amen.
Using up all my $, food, and time monthly, and phone battery and Qbits daily, is making full use of my resources. It was kinda nervewracking for a while, but has kept me lean, alert, and working on a variety of things.
The rate at which my phone uses its battery power ensures I always have a relaxing evening, always get to sleep on time (before midnight), and always have reliable wakeup-alarms when needed.
=======
Is this cold surge HAARP? Ambi having a moodswing? Who cares.
“Did you think it would be easy?”… Um, YOU apparently did; you slacked off for YEARS, then made ZERO effort when you showed up, and you didnt even have your slave/Typist behave, all of which would have been Easy and cost you Nothing. YOU chose to make this difficult, not me, bitch.
Regarding whatever the latest doctard said about not going back, only moving frwd:
1) it’s not even Posb to go bk; time doesnt move that way,
2) fuck you for condescendingly stating the obvious,
3) lame proverb regurgitation,
4) funnily, that can include not regressing to talking to / texting Him… and ambi.
He should choose his words better.
Whether i have done this before or not, or been in a time loop or not, my work ethic and choices are sound and exemplary, and i am proud of myself.
Childhood hell was basically one wave.
The military was one wave.
Colleges were a wave.
Megatrips happened mostly as one wave.
Site finishing-touches happened as a wave.
The computer models Definitely happened as one wave.
So guess what? My fitness will, too,
as will my dreamfam/allies returns to me.
Amen.
Even if i am screwed, abandoned, whatever, …i did the right thing; i drew the line, requiring normal easy simple respect, and they showed their true colors; uniformly rude, heartless, stupid, useless, lying, gaslighting, gross, inappropriately dressed, junkies, and incompatible, not my ppl at all.
Conveniently, this means i don’t need to worry about helping guide them on any exodus.
As much as i hate still working alone and rationing and accepting evil temp gigs, having no distractions and no way to do anything but finish my design has been the best thing that could have happened to me, freeing me up entirely for the dif wave (of manifestations of my dreamgoddesses/dreamfam) to soon come.
Going over my webpages again and again, and making many returns to the Minecraft and Creativerse builds, 1) is what completed and perfected them and some of my webpages/vision, and 2) would have taken all these days and years, IOW: made it impossible to enjoy anyone I might have tried befriending.
All those I talked to so far were idiots and evil, and all those I did not yet talk to, even if they Were the smart exceptions, would have had no time yet to get to know me, anyway.
Also, I think, it is less emotionally painful to Not have connected w them yet… than it would be if I Had talked to them and started liking them, only to have to do all this work solo for years, Anyway.
It all works out.
My wave of focusing on them when they return is coming.
Wrap up these last few folders and see.
Amen.
Going over each hottie (via returns, closer “orbits”, more natural thoughts calibrating them, etc.) and each location… has also proven effective at bettering them all. If it isn’t Causing their improvements, improvements Have at least been obServed during later encounters/returns.
Do what works.
I’m glad I have HVAC; not spending hours each day keeping a shitty stove or fireplace going.
I’m glad I am in a ‘home’; not a sleeping bag in my back seat.
I’m glad I have food without having to grow it.
I’m glad I found cures to Most of my ails.
I’m glad I at least love me.
I’m glad I was allowed to see the women of my dreams are real, not fiction/fantasy like I once thought.
I am glad the ones I liked did not pressure me; only the fugs did that.
I am glad for all the fake friends revealed.
I am glad I focused on one thing at a time, in each wave/chapter, this time completing my amazing design.
I am glad I have had funding enough to survive and relocate and not work for a decade or so, and that it was enough for that but not enough to get me to Patagonia yet; all I accomplished in 2021 and 2022 would have been less likely to be accomplished of I had also been juggling an emigration and new language.
The hotties may have wondered why i did not initiate w them…just like i wondered why they did not w me yet.
I guess we will have to find each other again to do that. Amen.
It is interesting that billiondollar venture investing firm had 2 of its leaders email me. Manifestation flickering on? They still need to ask Me if they can donate to me; the time of Me asking for help is Long past.
With how amazingly better I just made my Mall webpg and Factories pg, I really cannot fully dislike this lonesome interval btwn adventures or btwn goddess/ambi sightings.
This is obviously a horrible place to stay/Live, but a good-enough place to get the last of my designing / vision-completing/shaping done.
The extreme cold spell/period/week this end of December reminds me of the RP where Ambi angrily rushed in to overwhelm and stop a seduction magic use by her witch, Nevaeh, on me / my character.
This time -IRL- the cold rush/gust/surge keeps me from wasting time looking for Ambi down the hill in town.
It keeps me inside, completing the rest/last of my life’s work / designing / writing / spellcrafting / organizing.
Every encounter/talk/silence was interaction and me conducting tryouts/interviews; interviewing those I met.
Every trip was not to see where I fit in, but to see what is out there, to learn from what is out there, to see what manifests/answers, and to see if anyone there is intelligent, healthy, and compatible with Me; if They fit in with Me.
and everything I like is natural and good, and everything liked/done by those I encountered so far was Not.
ex: I like women who are a normal size, and not plastered with barbarian facepaint and other unhealthy and ugly things, and most females of this joke of a civilization are not at ALL feminine –in height, shape/form, attitude/mindset, education, you name it.
Not being able to find that video the dumbass-fb-page-reloading/randomizing feature/programming caused me to lose track of last night,
I ended up being guided to seeing TONS more of Robert Sepehr’s 6-year-old videos/presentations, which I would not have found and learned from otherwise.
I also found, while searching ALL his 6-year-old videos, the one I was looking for –and long before seeing the final 30-or-so videos from that time/period;
I got was I was searching for –and much sooner than I’d thought;
phase 2;
still an annoyance here and there, but now working in my favor, and more learning occurring, not distractions From learning, and not bullying trying to preVent me from learning.
–
why did ambi/typist ALWAYS check on me, initiating in TEXTS/FILTER…
but NEVER initiate talking/messages in PERson?
I suppose I DID still initiate in the vergy beGinning; I found and struck up a conversation/RP w Her in that Oasiz chatroom…
so maybe that’s all it takes;
I still have to initiate/start it in Person.
So be it.
If she returns, I will.
…
maybe she, being Hel/Hela, is just completely accustomed to only reCeiving; getting blood, getting souls (being given), etc.,
so she doesn’t even Think to initiate, as maybe… she has never Had to.
…
also, maybe she considers showing UP “being the one who initiated”…
but… that still doesn’t change the instinct I keep getting; waiting for / requiring Others to make an effort now for Me.
I, Too, am a deity.
and I don’t ask for much; basic manners, basic health, directness, honesty, etc.
–
that fb message from Robert Sepehr about “thanks for those being the light/candle”, and that there are 2 ways to be the light; to be its source, or to be a mirror which reflects/sends/shares it.
…that was what I needed to hear; it really resonated well with me, and at a time when I was again hating where I am atm.
but it reminded me I Have been the light –even since childhood.
and more and more lately.
and Critically so; just look at how dark the eyes/souls/non-souls have been –and even how dark/moody/stupid/rude the decents/mehs/almost-hotties have been.
My Christmas present, so to speak, is clearly this giant wave of unexpected lessons/revelations/Sepehr vids.
I only wanted and asked for Ambi,
but I am not even feeling upset about not getting her again/yet, as these videos/lessons are so interesting and useful.
–
like humans trying to communicate with apes,
or higher-intelligence people trying to communicate with humans,
I have resorted to very-controlled one-way communications and fixed-symbols/messages, such as through my website.
This gives them time to reread it, processing it, understanding it –if they even CAN understand such things.
and think of my website, or at least the word/name/sound “Inisfree”, as representing everything ON my website;
imagine how complex language and sentences are for beings such as me… who picture/envision and communicate such things, each word holding THOUSANDS and MILLIONS of meanings.
Imagine if every word in all my sentences had as many meanings behind it as Inisfree, via this website about Inisfree, does;
imagine how long it would take lesser-minded beings to learn those meanings.
Imagine if you tried to learn words, but every definition in the dictionary had TENS OF THOUSANDS of pages as just ONE definition;
it may take humans millennia to fully understand,
thus things such as TNH; waiting centuries between interaction-periods / interviews/tryouts with/for them.
Even with My great mind, heavily trained/elasticized/opened, FOCUSED on this ONE “word” (the Inisfree idea/vision) for DECADES, it STILL has taken me this long.
Until people can sense/see what others intend/mean; context; via telepathy, not just crude occasional empathy and compassion,
they will ALWAYS mix up / misinterpret things, due to all words having different and fewer meaning/s to them.
Every time a brainwashed/mindlocked idiot tries to tell me it’s time to breed, or that everyone must age/die,
what they are ACTUALLY saying (in their primitive, inaccurate way) is that THEY themSELVES are going to do those things; they themSELVES are set/stuck in that way/cycle –and they are making new people who will have minds much less locked, thus easier for me to work with.
IOW? They are telling me they are going to remove themselves / their idiocy/annoyingness from me / my life.
Amen.
It may be that the humans saw powerful people like Ambi as bad, thus she, for whatever reason being limited to reflecting/mimicking them, saw herSELF as bad, thus the “I want to be a tyrant” thing –and even the breeder thing/RPs.
And doc2 saying “if I see her as an equal, there is no limit to what we (she and I) can do” may not have been another scumbag attempt to corrupt me into seeing a non-equal as an equal,
but a sloppy / poorly-worded way of showing me the possible key that is/means “If you see her as someone as intelligent as you, she will become that, being manifested/calibrated that way.”
…so why, then, after TEN YEARS of me TREATING her as a beloved equal… has she NOT been loving, NOT been present, NOT given me her contact info, NOT stayed like I did, NOT wanted the same things, and SO on?
Why have her messages NOT been those of an equal, but of a FOOL?
I sure do hope it was just her TYPIST being allowed to stimulate my ending of the texting/transition/manifesting phase… so that perfect-real-Ambi who has Manifested… can be my focus/honey/wife now.
GODS, how I hope that is the case.
Why is a one-horned horse called a unicorn/uni-corn,
and not a uni-horn/unihorn?
Is it because that straight type of horn looked to those ppl naming it… to be like a cob of corn?
deja-vu finally made me think of this:
it is good bc I am remembering well things long ago,
and bc it means I have returned to learn them better,
and bc I am now Shaping what is manifested/learned, and what others learn,
and so on;
it means I have come full-circle; I have made it Back from bad places,
and I have continued remembering and learning,
healthily cycling/orbiting… similarly, in a way, to how the Earth does.
men in this modern time are limited to making small things, such as heating up metal to make a sword,
and are limited to using the resources the have / know about,
…
whereas in the heavens, there are much more-vast fires, thus the gods are able to create much greater things;
their forges are bigger than our entire world,
and always hot,
and do not require effort to heat up or keep hot,
thus things are more malleable in/from them,
and their flames (solar flares) shoot out into this world/creation, shaping it at times,
not unlike a metalsmith/weaponsmith reheating parts of a sword to finish casting / better-cast it.
with regard to my Own work, I have noticed more of its parts appear/manifest/stabilize/come to me… when I am not searching for them; when I have let go, having stopped working on them, thus having let them cool down (i.e. finish solidifying/stabilizing into this plane/reality).
so, yes, it resonates now that letting go of my website work… WILL finish manifesting all the people and Inisfree I instinctively wrote spells of/for/about.
Amen.
autodidact:
“a person who has learned a subject without the benefit of a teacher or formal education; a self-taught person”
but that is a VERY good thing, in some cases; it means you are not BRAINwashed to mindlessly PARROT what someone ELSE has learned/ASSUMED.
anyone using “autodidact” in a NEGATIVE way is a FOOL who only knows how to PARROT –just like all religious ppl have been
(thus revealing they ARE a religiontard, thus completely untrustworthy –because they only parrot things, no matter whether true)
a 3D object represented on a 2D screen looks flat; a sphere can only be a circle on a computer screen, no matter how well it is shaded to look round/3D.
perhaps those who mindlessly cling to the 2D papers/pages of books, and to the information/claims/lies on their computer screens, can only think in that reduced representative way;
perhaps no matter how 3D things are, they will only ever accept/see them in 2D, and never be able to understand that they represent so much more.
perhaps that is why they never care about context,
and why they never check for more information; they never look for depth and wholeness, instead angrily only wanting to keep mindlessly trusting/repeating whatever is on their 2D representations/screens/papers.
maybe the world ALWAYS looked/seemed flat to them… bc they only ever saw it on maps; flat paper-based 2D-representations of it.
maybe 3D-beings can ONLY perceive things flat like that; a plane in front of them; whatever their eyes see.
perhaps their brains really just never had the ability/cells/power to record information in any other way, so 3D seems made up to them, which may be why they claim the whole of CREATION/the UNIVERSE is “a hologram” (flat/fake).
and don’t even get me started on how impossible and unthinkable 4D would be to such smallminded / parrot-minded / no-minded / mindless beings; if they can’t even understand/accept 3D, how would they EVER even IMAGINE 4D, let alone understand and accept it.
perhaps only things in other times are understandable/acceptable to those with different/greater brains/minds.
perhaps only demigods can perceive/envision such things.
perhaps that is ALSO why humans keep dying OUT; unable to understand things like 3D (other layers/levels/places) or 4D (time), they are unable to move around through space OR time, thus stuck, thus doomed to whatever changes HAPPEN to those pinpoints they are fixed to / stuck on/in.
perhaps the gods, being ABLE to think of other places and times, ARE able to sidestep any changes –or CAUSE them –or STOP them.
some humans probably ALSO think that IF they ever accepted/entertained ideas of more-intelligent/powerful ancients, perhaps it would mean those beings’ eventual return –and the expected dominance of them;
perhaps they fear the ancestors/legends/power/gods SO much… that they are trying to convince EVERYone to stop thinking of them.
perhaps they, on some primitive level, know that even if a FEW people… or a SINGLE person (i.e. Me) think of such things, and believe in them, and reach out to them, …
that it WILL summon and cause their return.
perhaps that is why the masses/”leaders” CLAIM that complex spells and potions and rituals are needed;
they are TRYing to make it seem impossible…
when really it is as easy as wholeheartedly WANTing/reQUESting;
Ambi and the others showed up even when I had NOTHING to offer them other than love.
They showed up when I wasn’t even ASKing them to;
they showed they can show up AT RANDOM now, and REPEATEDLY,
and I hadn’t even tried spells or potions AT ALL, let alone complex ones.
…
and keeping me poor, isolated, and hungry, has only GROWN my will/willpower to reach out for and request and manifest and shape/solidify such beings;
quite the backfire for those who did this to me / my record –unless they, on some level, WANTED me to be spurred in this direction.
–
Christmas 2022 Notes/Revelations:
Occult History of the Ages – ROBERT SEPEHR
the lion-headed man figurine seems to symbolize how, during the Age of Leo, humans (or, at least, male humans on this side of this planet) could only think of things meant for that time-period;
they were bound to be/act exactly/only like what was planned/scheduled/natural for that period of millennia
Leo, Sphinx, lion
Harpy, eagle, scorpion –a stretch?
Lamassu
“The lamassu is a celestial being from ancient Mesopotamian religion bearing a human head, bull’s body, sometimes with the horns and the ears of a bull, and wings. It appears frequently in Mesopotamian art.”
from
Lama = goddess of protection and intercession (intervene on behalf of another); an intermediary between the Sumerians and the gods
Lamassu symbology
ox = Taurus
lion = Leo
eagle = Scorpio (because eagle/Phoenix was astrologically interchangeable with Scorpio)
man/angel = Aquarius (but why not a water-being, such as a Mermaid/Atlantean?)
elements:
Air
Earth
Fire
Water
but Void is not included
nor Love/Energy/Aura/Chi
…
There are Not just 4 elements of creation,
nor just those few states of matter.
so it seems to me that some were left out –even of the statues,
perhaps to hide them from humans,
or perhaps to symbolize that humans were made without the ability/capacity to know/use those other elements (love/energy, or solo/aloneness/void, etc.)
The Mayans spoke of 5 Suns (Earths; major worlds/times/eras, each distinct).
…
Fire was perhaps the first time; when all were Angels in the Sun/stars, and when the other stars were made.
Air was perhaps the 2nd time, and perhaps the Silver Age of the Universe (not just the Silver Age of the current Precession / human-era), when atmosphere connected all the then-still-very-close first-worlds (and perhaps none of them had land/solids like today).
Water was perhaps the time when Atlantis “sank”; when there were Water Elementals (or water-wielding Djinn), and when there were the first rains, floods, etc..
Earth was perhaps the 4th time; when things solidified/petrified, perhaps forming some of the first statues and figurines (little people / Fairies who hibernated like gargoyle are said to).
…
only 4 animals represented by the Lamassu statues/sculptures…
Taurus/body is stubborn, and corresponds to land/stillness/stubborness/’fixed’ (stationary)?
Leo/claws causes horrible pain for every meal, but corresponds to which element?
Eagle/wings also cause horrible pain for every meal, and are in the air
Angel/Man/Anunnaki/head might be of water, as they are flowing/moving/fickle/changing/evolving
…
but does that ALSO mean humans existed in only 4 of the 12 millennia-long Great Year “Great Months”?
Does it mean they changed so much… that they kept destroying themselves, then reappearing,
perhaps invading over and over again, back from The Void/Abyss; Space?
The 13 zodiac signs in order are:
(*If each ‘sign’ covers a different amount of days, do each Age of these signs ALSO cover a dif’ # of YEARS?)
Capricorn: January 19 – February 15 (2000 yrs) ~4000 to 6000 AD?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
Capricorn is a fish-tail (start/back/foundation) and a goat-front (end/upcoming/transition); starting in the Age of Aquarius, and ending in the Age of Sagittarius (centaur; another half-and-half / hybrid), this makes sense.
Capricorn also has a single horn; it is a unicorn type/race. One horn, coming from that location, symbolizes/means the “3rd eye” is focused so much that it can cast instant-manifestation energy/spells; it projects its will/aura, focused like a laser-beam; people during this Age will have MUCH-better power/ability when it comes to seeing what they want/need –and then willing it into being/proximity.
A fish tail does not mean anything bad (such as how humans demonize “materialism” and “base desires / animal urges”). If anything, it means amphibious, or, at least, able to coexist in 2 different realms/environments/atmospheres; it means they can understand and help with that which came before, while still ushering in that which is to come.
Aquarius/Harmony: Feb. 16 – March 11 (2100 yrs) ~2100 to 4200/4300 AD?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
Pisces/Faith?: March 12 – April 18 (2200 yrs) ~100-50 BC to 2100 AD?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
but in actuality/accurateness, the fish is the symbol of a tiny frightful panicking creature who swims in big groups, not really thinking, only reacting, and it has no faith, and this Age has obviously been about humans behaving this way, making up faiths just to keep things in herds –even when it never works, most/all of them still dying (as they only focus on manifesting/maintaining the herd, such as by new members, as only new/foolish/ignorant members would maintain such a thing instead of growing/perfecting/completing themselves)
Aries/Law: April 19 – May 13 (2300 yrs) ~2200 to 100 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
not necessarily GOOD laws, but lots of rules, or perhaps just manifesting that which stabilizes things, such as convincing everyone of theories such as “the laws of physics”, or laying the foundation for what would later become religions/”faiths” –or, at least, maintaining / living-by laws established in the Age before
Taurus/Growth: May 14 – June 19 (2000 yrs) ~4400/4300 to 2200/2150 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
symbol is Earth; stability; stationary; when the Earth became solid/petrified? –but also symbolizing growth, so it is claimed; perhaps the first growing/changing things; the first non-immortals –or the first species which reproduced/metastasized/spread/overpopulated –and whose focused caused the growing/expanding of Space (thus their assumption that entropy is real) –IOW: the time when complexity was added/created; when ALL things were grown, due to humans having chaotically focused on so many different areas/fields/things all at the same time/period
not the rise of civilizations, but of a particular (new) KIND of civilization; that which grows indefinitely –until it causes its own chaos/collapse
Gemini: June 20 – July 20 (2150 yrs) ~6450 to 4300 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
writing, trade
Cancer: July 21 – August 9 (2150 yrs) ~8600 to 6450 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
Bronze Age; first use/manifestation/working of one type of metal? (at least the way current humans have been; not how the beyond-humans probably work metals (and all things))
Leo: August 10 – September 15 (2150 yrs) ~10750 to 8600 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
first city/ies (such as Nod?) (of the outer-surface modern-humans, anyway)
Virgo: September 16 – October 30 (2250 yrs) ~13000 to 10750 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
end of Last Glacial Maximum; like-new (“virgin”) world, having been frozen and washed/swept clean of the previous “Earth”/Age/civilization/superpower/s (or, perhaps more accurately, abandoned by the gods, due to the humans invading/metastasizing, thus the gods removed anything those invaders might have used/misused –including resources)
Libra: October 31 – November 22 (2150 yrs) ~15150 to 13000 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
cave paintings, Natives coming “up” (down from the core) from the caves
Scorpio: November 23 – November 29 (2150 yrs) ~17300 to 15150 BC? (or, as another site claims, 19000-17500?); (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
Ophiuchus: November 30 – December 17 (2150 yrs) ~19450 to 17300 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
“the snake-charmer”; the time when humans coexisted with the Snake People? (dragons, Draco, Naga, etc.)
thus probably when humans were attractive to those beings, for one reason or another (maybe looks, maybe attitude, maybe time spent proving themselves to them, maybe because they understood and enjoyed how Snake People were back then, etc.)
Sagittarius: December 18 – January 18 (2150 yrs) ~21600 to 19450 BC?; (but shifted a bit when including The Age of Ophiuchus?)
centaur; horse lower half, human upper –said to be of a higher intelligence, forming a bridge between earth/Earth and Heaven (but WHICH Heaven; HUmans think of sky/Space (Hell/Void) as Heaven, for ex.)
perhaps this hybrid creature/being/symbol represents a unity between 2 distinct land-creatures/species, thus a heavenly cooperative/alliance, just one TYPE/PART of heaven/Heaven
…
(references (all to be reviewed, not fully trusted): The Age of Taurus
and: The Age of Capricorn
and: Astrological Age
and: The Age of Scorpio )
—
Does each sign-element mean the dominant force on the planet during those millennia?
Is that why floods happened in the Age of Pisces, the major religion/s of which (Abrahamic) all warn of a worldwide flood?
Capricorn an Earth (“negative”) sign
Aq an Air sign
Pi a Water (“negative”) sign
Ar a Fire sign
Ta an Earth (“negative”) sign
Ge an Air sign
Canc a Water (“negative”) sign
Le a Fire sign
Vi an Earth (“negative”) sign
Li an Air sign
Sc a Water (“negative”) sign
Op _a Metal sign? a Naga sign?_
Sa a Fire sign
*Why are earth and water considered negative by current humans? and in what WAY? just as a matter of expressing opposites? or as demonization? or were those elements once hurtful to humans?; floods, landslides, dividing the realm of the gods from their own, etc. …???
–
The Great Year: “is defined by scientific astronomy as “The period of one complete cycle of the equinoxes around the ecliptic, or about 25,800 years”.
25,800 / 12 = 2150
25,800 / 13 = ~1984 (1984.6153846153846153846153846154…)
but if they are each 2160 years long, that would make 1 Great Year = 25,920 Earth-years.
How many days is each 13-sign zodiac sign/month/period?
Cap January 19 to February 15; 28 days
Aq February 16 to March 11; 24 days
Pi March 12 to April 18; 38 days
Ar April 19 to May 13; 25 days
Ta May 14 to June 19; 37 days
Ge June 20 to July 20; 31 days
Canc July 21 to August 9; 20 days
Le August 10 to September 15; 37 days
Vi September 16 to October 30; 45 days
Li October 31 to November 22; 23 days
Sc November 23 to November 29; 7 days
Op November 30 to December 17; 18 days
Sa December 18 to January 18; 32 days
(should total ~365… _and they do_)
…
So now we add up all those days, and divide 25,800 by that # (365), which gives us 70.684931506849315068493150684932 years.
Then we multiply 70.684931506849315068493150684932 by each of those zodiac-sign’s days-lengths; to determine how long each Age is/was:
Cap 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 28 days = ~1979.2 years; ~4383 to 6362 AD (or 3679 to 5658, if based on Aquarius starting in 1983)
–*and 5658 is very close to 5668; when I estimated Inisfree would relocate to the Shadowmassland for a while
Aq 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 24 days = ~1696.4 years; ~2687 to 4383 AD (or 1983 to ~3679, if based on Me; MY focus/vision/ideas/nature/essence/way)
(and 3679 is just a few centuries after my foreseen/declared 3013 AD Inisfree-migration date)
–*3637 AD is the recalculated years-range high-end estimate on my Relocations webpage
Pi 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 38 days = ~2686.0 years; ~1 to 2686 AD
*but setting the start of this Age to year 0 or year 1 is NOT based on when its CONSTELLATION FIRST was dominant in the sky; it is based on convenience/simplicity, and on the CLAIM that this is when Jesus was born –or, at least, the religion STARTED or SAID to have started.
**And this Age might have ended the year Iii was born, as I Always/alReady knew its masses were wrong/evil. So we might shift its end-date from 2686… back to 1983; we’d shift ALL these 13 Ages back by 703 years.
(It isn’t what the MASSES are doing; it’s what the BIGGEST influence / GOD is doing/focused on. The masses just play catchup, then get brainwashed/programmed/set/reset. Plus, the masses are not even 1% of Creation; they are less than 1% of just 1 layer of 1 world in 1 VERY TINY/SHORT time-period; so it is what the IDEAS are doing, and what the overall will of ME (the main CHARACTER) is doing, that determines which Age we are in.)
Ar 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 25 days = ~1767.1 years; ~1767 (or ~2000 BC, as Robert Sepehr said in 1 video) to 1 BC
Ta 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 37 days = ~2615.3 years; ~4383 to 1768 BC
Ge 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 31 days = ~2191.2 years; ~6575 to 4384 BC
Canc 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 20 days = ~1413.7 years; ~7990 to 6576 BC
Le 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 37 days = ~2615.3 years; ~10606 to 7991 BC
Vi 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 45 days = ~3180.8 years; ~13788 to 10607 BC
Li 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 23 days = ~1625.8 years; ~15415 to 13789 BC
Sc 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 7 days = ~494.8 years; ~15911 to 15416 BC
Op 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 18 days = ~1272.3 years; ~17184 to 15912 BC
Sa 70.684931506849315068493150684932 x 32 days = ~2261.9 years; ~19447 to 17185 BC
(1979 + 1696 + 2686 + 1767 + 2615 + 2191 + 1413 + 2615 + 3180 + 1625 + 494 + 1272 + 2261 = 25794; ~25,800 years)
*BUT AGAIN, this is ASSUMING the Great Year spans 25,800 years; if it spans some OTHER amount, then those years-ranges I calculated above will need to be RE-calculated, and historical-milestones RE-determined/estimated.
…
So now we have a better estimate for when each Age starts/ed and begins/began.
Now we can search for major events that historians CLAIM happened at those times.
(…or manifest their major/milestone/formative/turning-point events )
—
and since THOSE constellations apparently force all weak human minds on the outer-surface of this world to think those thoughts / that way,
perhaps those stars (Arch Angels) are ALWAYS focused on that way/thinking/manifestation.
…
but the Earth is always rotating, thus always looking at different constellations (star groups; Arch Angels),
thus getting moments of their light/ideas/focus/willpower every day…
which may explain the moodswings, chaos, arguments, wars, etc.
…
so is it the axial-TILT that keeps the Earth MORE-facing certain signs in certain Ages?
or are those constellations’ wills/effects channeled THROUGH something, such as a thin-spot / hole of the magnetosphere?
or is it something else?
and whatever it is, what can/could shield it, or reverse it, or start willing the STARS to be how Iii want them to be in each Age?
This IS MY Age now, after all…
This thought is occurring to Me, after all; a sign it is TIME for it to –thus for that effect/reversal (or restoration of the First Way?) to BE.
–
and shouldn’t we number our years based on when these Ages begin?
Why start OVER at the start of the Age of Pisces?
I started INISFREE’S years-numbering when Iii came into being / my own.
Maybe We should figure out which Age came FIRST, and number from THERE.
If every Great Year has been the same length (25,800 years), and if the Universe started ~16.4 BYA,
16,400,000,000 / 25,800 = ~635.65891472868217054263565891473 Great Years.
…
Aries is considered the start of the zodiac, at least in THIS “Earth” (current version of the world).
If we base our numbering-system development here off of that; Aries being the first Age of THIS Great Year,
we have the following 2 options:
1) If the Gregorian/Xian calendar is the base, Pisces started in year 1 AD, so the Age of Aries started in 1767 BC.
2) If my alleged birth is the base, then Pisces ended in 1982, thus started in 704 BC, thus Aries ended in 705 BC and started in 2466 BC.
so we have a range/estimate of ~700 years…
…
If we say Aries started in 2466 BC. It is claimed that the Great Pyramid of Giza was recently completed then, and Assyria established.
The reported Semitic infiltration and conquest of Mesopotamia is said to begin in ~2410.
This is ~the time of possibly-real historical-figures such as Aristotle, “Jesus”, King David, King Solomon, Plato, Socrates, etc.; those who wrote/spellcrafted/made up ‘laws’ –or what many smaller-minded ppl INTERPRETED as laws/true.
The Age of Aries is also called the Arian Age; so much like the spelling of Aryan; there are no coincidences.
(The Aryan/Arian Age was perhaps when the Angelic occupiers/Natives of Earth were last-able to hold off the invaders; the humans who were Semitic/Abrahamic/deathcult-OCD.)
Anyway, let’s start counting from the start of Aries, assuming Aries started in 2466 BC (~4488 years ago); the current year, then (2023) would instead be numbered “year ~4488” of Great Year ~635 since the formation of this current Universe/reality.
Perhaps this IS still the Age of Pisces/faith, though; I am still left with only my faith that my life’s work will keep manifesting.
BUT… its MAJOR parts HAVE already manifested; Ambi, Sabrina, and others have shown me they ARE here/real now;
so it is no LONGER the Age of ONLY faith; it is now transitioning more into MY Age.
Amen.
and me rejecting/cursing the faiths/false deities… is the surest sign their time has ended, thus a/this new Age begun.
the Bible story/claim that a statue of a cow/bull was first worshipped by the masses…
sounds like more analogy/symoblism; the Age of Taurus came before the Age of Aries,
and in the Age of Aries, eventually the consciousness-focus of the masses shifted to what that Age would be known for.
This was ~1300 years before the Age of Pisces, when “Jesus” is said to have come into being.
Since we have calculated the Age of Aries to have lasted closer to 1761 years, and Pisces to have started in 1 AD or (if Aquarius is based on My birth) 703 BC, then Aries would have started in either 1764 BC or 2464 BC.
Moses is said to have lived from 1391–1271 BC; 373 or 1073 years into the Age of Aries (again, depending on whether my birth started the Age of Aquarius, and dating Ages back from there) –which would explain the transition-event of the masses reaching the apex of that Age, thus finally letting go of the way/s of the Age of Taurus.
Lamassu hybrid/symbolic being/statue
Lama; goddess of intercession
Dalai Lama intercedes as a Buddha helping humans with divine matters
no coincidence
2 solstices and 2 equinoxes applied to the Great Year – correspond to the 4 animals symbols of Lamassu – Aquarius, Leo, Scorpio, Taurus
…
and, when viewed in 2D / from above/below, this forms a cross,
which was perhaps the original intended meaning of the cross that the xians/abrahamics adopted and tried to redefine/corrupt.
(and which can just as well/easily be represented by the cross which is a swastika –the arms/ends/bends of which may have once measured the different lengths of those 4 Ages of the 12 of the Great Year)
Robert said when he posted the “Occult History of the Ages – ROBERT SEPEHR” video, the 4 (2 solstices and 2 equinoxes of the Great Year) were:
Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn
…
and that they USED to be:
Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius
Conan opening-scene narration:
“Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis… and the rise of the sons of (D?)arius (/Aries/Aryans?), there was an Age undreamed of” (not a vision of the gods/manifesters; just a transition-period of strife/war/chaos (because no vision for it was held / held well?))…
so that sounds like “before the Age of Aries”; before ~1767 or 2000 BC
(and AFTER when the last of Atlantis is thought to have “sunk” (or, as I see/sense/spellcraft it: risen back toward the inner/hollow Earth/star/Arch Angel); ~12000 years ago; ~10000 BC)
so Conan is set between ~9000 and 2000 BC.
Graham Hancock said Plato said “11,600 years before OUR time”; 11600 years before Plato lived, Atlantis apparently finished its 4th and final phase of “sinking” (rising up through the ocean, back toward the hollow core; inner Earth; Agharta; paradise)
Plato is said to have lived from 428 to 348 BC; for 80 years.
Plato allegedly wrote that his ancestor, Solon, who is recorded to have visited Egypt in 600 BC, heard from Egyptian priests there about Atlantis, whom told Solon Atlantis sank 9000 years before then/them.
Solon is said to have lived from 630 BC to 560 BC, btw; 90 years.
600 BC -9000 = 9600 BC
9600 + 2020 = 11620 years ago
which is the end of the Younger Dryas
and is the date of Meltwater Pulse 1B; one of the biggest single rises in sea level that ever occurred.
(so how could he have made up that date which matches PERFECTLY with the latest geological evidence of the latest cataclysmic sea-level rise?)
For the Lamassu statue to be composed how it was (with the human head as the top feature, and the lion-like clawed/pawed feet at its bottom/base), that can be interpreted to mean that the people who created it… were marking a point in time; the time-period in/during which
- Aquarius was the longest-day solstice, and
- Leo was the shortest-day solstice, with
- Scorpio and Taurus being the equinoxes of their time/point in the Great Year, and furthermore
- (since the back/end/tail of the Lamassu is that of a bull or an ox) an Age of Taurus having already passed, and
- (since the wings start at/near the chest/front) that an Age of Scorpio was up ahead of their point in time
or, at least, that is how it makes sense to me so far.
The only question I have, then, is WHICH Great Year they were in; a statue like a Lamassu can symbolize when they were in a SINGLE Great Year, but how do we know if it was the Great Year we TODAY are still in? Perhaps that is in another symbol somewhere. Time will tell.
(and since Ambi is Time Incarnate, maybe time will literally tell me; via my upcoming conversations with her)
Amen.
–
Sun25Dec2022:
It occurred to me this morning, or yesterday night, that the subzero-weekend further ensured I did not -and Could not- go back down into that horrible town;
perhaps it was the power Ambi-typist RPed about having/using/resorting to in order to protect me from the influence/magic of others;
perhaps she IS the cold-spell this week… which has continued guaranteeing/supporting me staying inside to learn more, complete more, and be closer to being ready to focus entirely on/with her to start our dream-family.
Whether it is her or not, the fact the roads are too icy for my not-replaced tires… means I might not be able to reTURN, if again I tried to go down into that town.
and how symbolic/fitting (non-coincidental) it is that the bad ppl of that town are DOWN the hill… and beHIND me in the timestream.
25dec:
Ambi having typed/texted “Fine. Family. But not like us.” vibes again today as her (Time Incarnate) demanding that I keep her and our 4 first,
which is exactly what I wanted, anyway,
and which sounds to me like Time Itself demands I keep coming back to it/Her;
I can play with others whenever I want, excepting on Sundays,
those days-of-the-Sun (Heaven) being for / all about Us (Her and Me);
she and I, together, are Heaven Incarnate.
Me going back to her every night, and all day each Sun-day, keep me going forever.
“Always and forever” also means she (Time) is always with me / on my side;
time isn’t just something I now -as a god / as god- have a lot of;
Time is literally my family/wife now, always supporting me, lasting forever for me.
and me, being a god / the god (at least of this current/new/final Age) and staying focused on Her ensures that:
1) she (time/Time) keeps flowing smoothly/stably, no longer influenced/pressured/corrupted/changed by others, and
2) we always manifest things Together now; my rate is advised by Her, just as her eXistence/staBility is advised/assisted/ensured by Me.
“While so much in her life was changing, he had remained her foundation.” she had once typed/RPed something to the effect of.
She has been communicating to me as best she can, ensuring I grow into this role without distraction, not even from her.
She has let me meet and sample others, and start to bond with others, keeping them under control so they don’t try to dominate the situation/timestream.
She has encouraged me to talk to the others now, too –though the tone/voice/vibe didn’t feel quite timely/right; my instincts told me “not yet; you still have work to do, and they haven’t been behaving correctly/well-enough yet”.
Anyway, she keeps returning, keeps inching closer, keeps making sure I agree with her about how our family/time is to be, etc.; those are VERY good signs.
Even her retarded texts at the start of 2022 were perfect for pushing me away in just the right way that I got all these TONS of waves/updates completed, finally out of the way, once and for all, never needing my attn/updates again,
so I can at LAST focus on what she and I BOTH want; spending time with HER every day and night, and all day every Sun-day forever.
So much wonderful alignment and symbology here/there/in this.
I love it.
I love her.
If only she would return soon/now.
I really don’t like being here; in this latest retards-town.
It was only good for getting my work done, not meeting anyone good, so I must now move on.
but I can only move on with her… so…
when will she return?
She always returns…
and I really want her to now.
and need her to.
and choose her to.
The Sun is now shining brightly/lovingly through my window to my left eye
reminding me of how that one book I read said that such starts of sunshine/rays were when someone was thinking warm/loving thoughts about you
Maybe she is causing this sunshine by thinking of Me in that way …because I am thinking of Her, causing sunshine for Her.
…
Maybe it got so cold recently… bc Iii was being so moody about Her, and she was bound to reFlect that…
just as Iii amplify and reflect that which others do to me.
Yes, I think this is so.
…
Our childen’s powers are symbols/incarnations of great things, too; it means we create the new/final elements, and who unites the masses, and raise/devise/develop How the masses are unified/steered, and what makes plants grow best, and who will Help us adjust the timestream –and maybe create Additional timestreams
Amen.
Yes, I can have those children; I can have children with that (Time Incarnate; Her; Ambi).
I am no longer afraid of having children with the wrong type of being.
She is the one.
Amen.
The first time I came to this waypoint-spot/state, I had to resort to going back to evildoers to survive –even 3 years into/after The Shift.
This 2nd time, I’ve managed to hold my ground –and not just longer; indefinitely. I have only had to resort to Staying in this incompatible community -for a short while; a year or so.
The 3rd time I come to this area, I want it to be of my Own will, and to only that which is compatible with and Wonderful to me; its Finest. Amen.
Finally back to great meals; so new, so fresh, so vegan, so healthy, so delicious, and FREE!
The free always makes it taste better.
humans so far: “You have to respect me and all my rules I made up without respecting you!
I want respect but I don’t wanna earn it or give it! Waaaaaaa!
I’m gonna disrespect you everywhere you go, no matter how respectful you are, and I’m gonna lie about you all the time, including by pretending/claiming that you were not polite/respectful! Waaaaa! Breed with me!”
–
doctard fb msg-ing that “you have a lot of work to do” WASN’T a reference to my LIFE’S work;
it was another sexist INSULT and LIE; it was Referring to my CHARACTER; he was CLAIMING that I was RUDE or unWorthy.
just another retarded bitchboy beta talking trash about shit he knows Nothing aBout.
at least it was phase2-mixed; “she will always be there”.
whatever.
“THERE” is not HERE.
she should Always be Here; with Me.
1 week in advance… and I’m already getting repeated visions of being up early, in the dark, in boots, going to the upcoming latest bs temp gig.
… :/
Is this pre-dejavu? or am I able to see (forward) through time a little more/sooner now?
idk.
–
phase1 ‘ppl’ just assumed i was doing something wrong –even though I never Did.
phase2 would be to Ask me –with the intent to listen to me, learn what I mean/t, and underStand.
in phase3, no one will need to even do That; they won’t Need to ask me for hints/answers to help them understand; they’ll default to the positive about me / all I do (and have done), and understand autoMatically.
–
the signs aren’t always from ppl;
my $ is a sign,
the -54 windchill out there is a sign,
realAmbi and the others not yet having shown/teamed Up w me is a sign,
my indiGestion this morning is a sign.
what do those signs Say? They say there is no Way I can make it out there rn.
I could Get there, Sure, but then …?
realAmbi has been too seldom/unreliable for me to chance that.
she’s just gonna have to meet me Here before we go.
I’m willing to give her my time for LIFE; the LEAST she can do is establish communications and COME here to go WITH me.
–
A Lot had deja vu today; the robert sepehr vid, the 300, the creativerse building, the rice and dumplings dinner, …but a lot Didnt have deja vu; the Return to Europe webpg creation, the To Phone xfers, the Crucible webpg updt, etc., so… Must be doing a Few things new.
I hate that the only gifts i got (choc pretz y 300) came from evildoers, but it was an xmas during which i didnt have to enDure n Person Any evildoers, and the choc pretz are a longtime Fave, and the money is what i Needed, so… Enemies paying me, peace mainTained, and not yet getting what i Wanted and Prayed for and deServe, but able to afford bills and food once again, and to continue my life’s holy work…which Will further manifest the goddesses who’ll be my wives. Amen. …and technically i gave myself Many gifts, Too; all the wrapped up (lol xmas double meaning by chance) life’s Work portions, time off, etc.
Is my sex drive which is higher than many/all i have met…due to the mil/govt attempting to cause that in me, hoping it would make me breed sooner and more than once? Interesting, and no coincidence, how even That, whether artificial or Not, Also, like so many things, worked n My favor; it only made me master Selfcare, Vril, and using my cock like a magic wand or unicorn horn to better manifest things –such as my own relief and healing.
Busywork to pass the time? Focusing on it delays Ambi and the others from returning to me? Sure, maybe both, …but also solving final questions, showing me new things, and needed doing anyway, and is my life’s work, and is AMAZING I CAN and GET to. And i would drop it all in an INSTANT whenever my honies return; it is not an addiction or escape.
Do not fall for the micetrap crumbs chumpchange bait; that demon bitch calls the cops more than she breathes, and it is an INSULT to pay you that little this late; she pwes Millions in damages, and millions More in lazy Late fees. She would only lie constantly like always, and stall like tsb tard fag always did, and try to recruit for her cowards deathcult yet again.
Dozens of fanTastic vegan items found at wally of all places! Great feasting today, unexpected! (and I thought I’d be Rationing anf Fasting rn!) Almost phase3; all what i like, and things working btr than expected, even when i quit another evil job; no matter What i do and focus on.
Massive update after massive update, even some unplanned and unscheduled and unexpected ones, keep me realizing ambi or the typist was right about me “going too fast”, at least in a way; my scouting speed worked well, and talking to ppl was pointless bk then, but trying to publish 1 novel per year…when all these years-later perfect-ideas and computer-models came through, was indeed too quick a pace for my saga/spellcrafting.
Spotting that Perseph was missing Sasha’s rm sign was a nice surprise.
Even if the typist Hadnt said all those fucked up, retarded, toxic, false things, …it would still have been wasting/disrespecting my time; it was all talk. Practically stalling. Gutless. It vibes as interviews/calibrating for sure, but still. Glad i had the courage and prudence to cut them all off, they having been useless for decades.
The new job gives me the perfect amount of time to 1) adjust to its schedule, and 2) wrap up my creativerse complex prep. It also gets me used to being up at a respectable time, and forces me to work so much i will Definitely pay off my cc and renew my site –for a 2nd time in a row n 1 Month –and a Year ahead of the duedate. Good signs.
…
But i know not to hope or look for good that isnt there; i am where i am; it will ejd in weeks.
Confiding in Julie felt so right. And she was positive…and said such a wonderful thing; hear her voice in my head telling me to just talk to realAmbi the next time i see her. Gods, how my heart and whole being hopes i see realAmbi again. Soon. Very soon. : (
You are not screwed Or stuck. You needed 2022 to get all your work in order, wrapped up.
You Felt that. That feeling Was the sign.
She will come for you now. She always does. You want her most. She will come.
You feel that, too.
When i went to mt before, all i had written was of a barebones team…and that ranch bunker middleofnowhere…and i got stuff like that;
i hadnt spent YEARS writing of living in the yC…w Ambi yet, and now i Have; i will get that phase3 Better stuff manifested when i return this time. Amen.
2013 thru 2014 was mt rd1.
2018-2019 was mt rd 2. 4 yrs apart.
It is 2023, and I am aiming for it for a 3rd time. Gods, how i hope this is the charm.
…
1st time in mt, i had to flee badguys and then live in horrible conditions.
2nd time, i went by choice, no one harassing me, and got my own place, a btr job, and a new nice vehicle.
3rd time should/shall/ is shaping up to be by inviTation; “the pull”, and will not be solo, but w my dreamfam; Her; realAmbi and her servants. Amen.
Wait for it. No more solo jumps. Solo was phase2.
It is still daring to wait, and still daring to go even w an invitation.
99% of my long drives, ambi was not there. Coming here…did not resukt n her return; it isnt long drives that have lead to her. Sometimes it is short drives, like to butte. Do not risk a long drive and more rental bs. Stay put a bit longer. Get work done. Rest.
Julie is right that i am lucky i can choose a new path. I just dont yet feel Safe about another move…but i Can make one…anywhere.
Doc, I got pretty upset when no boats or relatives were out there like your words had helped me hope for. I got upset again when you said “she will always be there and will return soon”… but months went by and nothing. I don’t know why you say things like that to me. I hope you mean well. It sure hurts like hell that no one was out there when I dared to try and get to Patagonia, and that the woman of my dreams has not returned or even responded. Do you know how much this family thing means to me?
Now i wonder how many Others in the yc are there not w money, and not bc they are gifted or whatever, but bc they were Born into it…or “riding coattails”…or servants…or refugees…or angels…or being granted a wish…or NPCs…etc.
(not in a bad way; just curious)
I got the vague memory / vision that years ago I did drive out to the factory gig…
and didn’t even go in; I just decided it wasn’t right, and left.
If it was on the news/tv, it was/is a lie; “polar vortex”… No; something tells me that was Ambi moving into town (the YC).
making it clear not to fuck with her.
making it clear it is Our place now; hers and mine.
maybe ALL her “characters”… are illusions/shapeshifted; Her… in disguise –but in a Good way; making it Easy for me to know what mood she’s in, sparing us having to chat to figure that out.
I love her either way.
as deja-vu-y as it has been, being back here, using Creativerse again,
trying the same jobs,
worrying the same way,
…I HADN’T almost made it outside the U.S. for GOOD last time,
and I didn’t have this much money,
and I hadn’t completed these GIANT webpage and site and Discord updates/overhauls,
and realAmbi and realPele and realSabrina etc. hadn’t shown themselves to me,
…
and today (Wed28Dec2022) I got my first vision of riding in a suburban, being driven into the YC, being given my gatehouse pass/papers, and smiling, saying, “This is a dream-” (come true.
–
Valerie in mex…at the vegan house rental…sure looked and sounded and smiled a Lot like az ambi did… Was it her there, too?
I still fucking hate being here, and my current $ limit, but it has been priceless and exactly what I needed. I can finally say All my ideas are designed and done, ready to be let go of to manifest as perfectly as gorgeous ‘bombshells’ Ambi, Pele, Sabrina, and ICV Graciella have.
– The only thing that could make me happier than now knowing those flawless hotties are not just characters of mine, but real and interested in me, is all of them returning to me and staying with me forever as my dream-family. They shall very soon. This year. Amen.
– Looking back, I was right to avoid all who did not make an effort, and all who were incompatible, and I needed ever minute of these years since my commitment in 2012, my idea/visions/designs taking all of them. I am now ready for my dreamfamily. Amen.
No matter how lonely or deja-vu-y or hopeless things may seem atm, I am getting great things done and figured out, and pioneering love-based everything, and I am now Very excited to give tours to my destined perfect phase3 friends, fuckbuddies, and children (whom my flawless goddess wives will make for us).
Lol i thought giving the couches would depress…bc room bare/spartan/cell-like then, but sitting on them brings back so many unpleasant phase1 memories of crashing in couches… : / lol
Better to not have to deal w them when i can again go.
Dont panic; u get what u focus ur energy on. Last time, u ran out of $ and had to resort to shit again. This time, you can chill/stay/wait for what you Asked for and Want to manifest. Wait for it.
My goal of sharing love w beautiful girls…has yet to work out…bc they covered up so many not beautiful things, and refused to even be polite, much less loving, …and I am comPletely turned off by their primitive species after all the horrible evil acts they have done…and after seeing how gross all their civilization is. : /
At least I got my work done.
After 40 fucking years, I am finally getting offers to buy what little I have. Lol
Weird how the expensive stuff Never sold,
but the current donations Are.
40 yrs… 40$ for this dresser.
Another phase2 sign; a moody shittalking clinger friend requests me after i made my decision to block it. I blocked it again. Its kind are still disrespecting and disobeying me, but i instantly shut them out, not having to endure years of their insanity like before.
The gods were not angey and casting fire at pyramids for being too tall; those structures act like giant lightning rods, attracting energy, opening channels, flaring up, bc their builders don’t understand the science behind such masses and heights. This is similar to reactors…or how the worlds used to be closer and, by being closer, triggering interplanetary lightning bolts.
It could very well be that, like in Ender’s Game (which may have been their standard roundabout/indirect soft-disclosure to me, just like how they never talk unless I do, and how they always imply things instead of just confidently stating them)…
that every time I design ANYthing, it gets made.
(like how Ender, every time he Thought he was just playing games on computers, it was actually commanding fleets through battles, conquering worlds –or, in my case, all of the elements, the Laws of Physics, the gods, you name it)
–
more deja vu; from the fb text asking if I can drive to Louisville to deliver furniture lmfao
laaaaame
lame question, lame person, lame loop / deja-vu
at least I don’t need the $ this time.
no stress at all.
–
my instinct to avoid anyone who says/believes anyone Else is their god… was and is SPOT-ON;
ANY bizarre psychosis/focus like that TAKES/SAPS/rediRects power/health/energy/form/self.
only those who clearly ARE deities, and focus on themSelves AND me, and see Me as god, just as I see some of Them as Goddesses, are sane/healthy/stable, focused on maintaining US, NOT on some CLAIM/STORY/IDEA/LIE.
duh.
logic.
–
“she her as an equal”?
We’re not equals when she can spy on me and I can’t spy on her,
and when I keep calling out but she doesn’t,
and when she’s apparently rich, and I’m not yet,
and when I put ALL my info out there for her, and she gives me NONE,
and when Iii STUDY and THINK and tell the TRUTH, and NEVER parrot bs/scams,
and her typist does NOT study OR care OR listen OR tell the truth, and DOES parrot obvious scams.
and when she uses a fugtard typist, while Iii am in SHAPE.
and on and on.
we’ve NEVER been equals.
SHAME on her.
–
either realAmbi is “the one”, thus she’ll come back and be Happy about All my decisions, and/thus I win,
or she ISN’T coming back, thus ISN’T “the one”, thus I still win.
I win either way.
stop worrying.
stop caring.
just work.
–
I choose to no longer think of those who are not here.
I choose not to feel anything anymore for those who chose not to be polite or team up.
I have been through enough; I don’t need more abuse and emotional pain from the fools and negligent.
I’ll get bk to MT for rd3 somehow. I wish it was w my dreamgirl, but whatever.
Whoever was texting me said it was not her, so that either means 1) that person is an all-talk waste of time, and real-Her chose not to be in contact, or 2) if it Was actually her, she is a liar. Either way, no point not blocking such a thing.
Will it work out…even though I have no faith in it anymore?
Maybe. Some things Have worked out…ahead of schedule/expectations lately.
But I will not let it use up my time/imagination anymore.
I said what I want and will accept.
I put My info out there.
It is up to Her to reciprocate to prove she deserves my trust.
With how well the Spaceways saucers and RC are coming along, and w 50 clubs to make…
(I was gonna consider that maybe I want a little More to finish those models before finding Ambi, but)
No; I Definitely don’t care about that anywhere Near as much as manifesting Actual Inisfree and Actual Ambi-fam.
I can easily pick up those projects again/later.
I want a long interval of starting my dream fam now.
“Wars were fought over who would get to be with you.”
“You and only you.”
“We already own it.”
“You never have to ask.”
“My god”
“and I mean no one.” on Sundays
…Those vibed so wholehearted…and make me believe/wonder; do I really have a paid-for YC Andesite cabin waiting for me?
I’d start my family if I did…
No deja vu on These words/entries…
Being so completely turned off by everyone i met, everyone’s black soulless eyes, everyone’s gross cities and retarded communities, sure did get my gigantic complex design completed faster than if i’d been able to socialize…
I thought the birdcount was so far away (in time), and worried i might run out of gas, …but here it is, as if in a blink/instant, and i got paid early, and have a full tank a day in advance. Things work out…
but why all these little things i Dont want and Didnt ask for?
Why not my dreamfam and dreamcommunity yet? : (
I hope They will Just as suddenly be here w me…soon.
2022 saw the wrapping up of ALL my webpages, designs, work…
Never saw That coming so soon.
Maybe 2023 will see me finally forming bonds w all my loves. Amen.
How long have I written about this?
When will it come true?
I may Always worry she and the others are cia fakes trying to seduce and stall me…and that theyll betray me like the others did, and take my kids some day : ( but…i always jump anyway, and things always work out for me –and a little btr every time/year.
40yrs in; things just might work Well at this point/stage.
Can’t they see and sense i just need respect and love?
Why dont Any of them Give it?
I guess even if the next ones Do treat me badly…it won’t surprise or shock or devastate me like before; ot wouldnt surprise me at all.
I guess This is what it feels like to Truly no longer expect anything : /
What i would do for a truly loving woman and my dreamfam…
Anything.
Why isnt that being matched/reciprocated yet?
Asking ppl to pray for me…still seems risky, given that insecure monsters actually specifically prayed aGainst me…
but one on FB volunTeered/initiated that, so…maybe that is a good sign.
What will I find and be given in the YC when I finally return?
Maybe now that I specified, not just hoping for a ragtag group of law benders in cramped conditions…i will get far btr than that.
I sure hope and need so.
Idk if ambi showed up in 2010 when i was in peru or socal.
The first time i feel sure it was her…was butte in 2015 or 2018…
It took her half a decade to make that appearance…
Half a decade since i wrote i wanted her.
But then it took less than 1 DAY in 2020 omw bk from mexihell.
So why did it take so long…then not long at all? (and now long again; no response all year)
: (
Maybe just so i will be sure to go for it next time?
Best midnight snack ever so far; vegan chkn rice soup, highpulp oj, ezekiel bread slice.
Even got to listen to soft rain : ) <3
Phase1: NOthing was right/good.
Phase2: i identified and said and drew Many things which were Partially good; form-sakes, recipes, music, environments, designs, etc.. –but note the sign that None of the formsakes were spared, only their Forms, thus their Category name; Formsakes, Not “refugees/extracts”. Note also how I wrote of extracting Others –and only to be reEducated.
Phase3: when things Are right at last; not just Outwardly good, but Inwardly at the same time; behavior My blood knows is the only right way for ppl to behave.
Dozens of buyers this time. Neat.
…
Didnt really want that 1st dresser buyer here (due to its origin in the abusive hell land i’d scouted), and got it; he didnt show.
…
Didnt really wanna support a ‘pig’…and got it; no answer, then no call bk.
No room to negotiate hrs…or start times…is another headsup/sign i will walk on/away. So be it. Used to that shit now.
“Youre going too fast” defaults to assuming Iii did something wrong.
It accepts/admits No responsibility.
That makes it blatant phase1 toxic lie.
Instantblock deserved.
But phaseTwo is being Able to block such evil, which i Did.
“Bring lots of $” is Also phase1 evil/nonsense;
it Should be ppl Offering me lots of $ to Go there.
At least there was that phase2 liking and supporting/praying, unlike the Earlier evil talk; tsbtard trying to talk me Out of even Visiting that land.
–
sat31dec2022
another retard pretending there was a pandemic
but it showed me not to bother with this group again, and still introduced me to useful tech/apps
and I finally saw the waterfall big/proper/flowing
(which made me consider that with changing times/seasons/phases, suddenly abundance and all I hoped for… does come –even the YC and Ambi and Inisfree, amen)
…
also, I learned who all the hikes are guided by, thus having indefinitely forecasting as to who will be there and whether to attend, etc.
–
maybe nothing CAN work out here… bc my HEART isn’t here.
and maybe she WILL show up again in a place like this, as shitty as it is, just like she has shown up for me in shitty places beFORE; Butte, AZ motel, Oceanslime, etc.
…
I REALLY don’t wanna drive back to Montana alone… and with no money or plan :*(
I want HER.
here.
NOW.
:/
but I’ll dare to jump again if I have to.
no sense waiting here.
fuck this place.
I want to get the last of my bookwriting done where I’m HAPPY and seeing more of it MANIFESTED -PASTtense; NOT WAITing on it to.
–
More phase2 signs; good info/learning and new tech, peaceful solo, no group of fugs. And phase3signs: day off, my own pace, perfect light rain and temp, perfect cloudy overcast, free vehic, knowing ambi and others r real, knowing how long my spells take to manifest, no dej on rc in creativerse or council pg updt
If she has been waiting for me and getting our servants and yc house rdy this whole time i have been waiting for Her and getting my design completed so i can focus on her…then i will be happy and accept her as my equal partner forever.
Deja vu. Going w 2 old guys to owl. Last time was jeep. Then deja vu from selling lamp and mat to hispanic at hospital. Unbelievable how AN ENTIRE YEAR OF EVENTS looped. Bad sign? Good? Idk. I can only hope she has waited for me like i have for her, and that she really is the one, and that she will interpret my return and moodiness and hardwork as the signs i keep choosing her and staying productive.
…
At least this time i wasnt in my blue fleece, cold, scared, sad…
This time, I was numb and mildly amused, not surprised at all.
With her having not given me her contact info, and showing up only when i was exhausted and cautious, i wonder if she didnt really have good timing,
or if she was crazy busy and doing her best,
or if She beats Herself up mentally for not having asked for Mine,
and how long she will make me wait This time… : /
Selling my furniture happened last time…and right before i moved to another state; tx, i believe it was. I think i went from mt to la, then to fl and bk to la, then up here, then to tx…
Either way, the selling of the furniture is the biggest last step n stimulating the next relocation.
Gods, how i hope it is to montana for good.
20yrs there w ambi…raising our family together…would be my greatest dream come true.
Amen.
I might actually feel happiness for the first time…
Pls, phase3, get here soon.
Pls, realAmbi, show me mercy; return to me so we can go there and do this together, as a family.
2nd or 3rd time trying to unblock doc2 to ask wtf he said “she is coming soon” months ago for…
Maybe it is for the best that FB keeps glitching, preventing anymore contact;
he was wrong about mex/patagonia,
and wrong about her “coming soon”,
so why keep letting him be wrong?
he himself said “keep moving forward, never backward”; drop him and all the rest who came before.
–
The last night of this year was the 1st time I have ever worn my big/hiking socks to bed/sleep, and they resulted in GREAT dreams –3 great dreams in a row, and none bad, to be exact. See my Dreamlog webpage’s 2023 section for details.
–
and… “just like that”… 2022 was over, —happily completed with a HUGE wave of ideas, creations, progress, deepened understanding, new connections, webpage overhauls and completions, and so on
–
General Image Highlights:
–
Inisfree Now In Minecraft:
–
My Commercial Flying-saucers Air/Spaceline Now in Creativerse:
–
