1990
My only memories of the father are occasional walks, sitting on the trunk of his shitty car in the garage with the garage door up during thunder and rainstorms, and the occasional spanking or fight between him and the mother. There is a blurry memory of being in a dark office with a green-hooded brass desk lamp on, and Pepperidge Farm cookies he didn’t want me eating so many of. Now I am heavily distracted from those few and fading memories by the constant harassment of the mother’s religious-fanatic family near Oklahoma, and having to share the upstairs guest bedroom with her and the sister. I begin trying their Nintendo downstairs, and love the game with the fake rifle blasting birds on the screen, wishing I could use it in Mario Bros., too.
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1991
The abusive Sundays get worse every week, and more and more church activities are forced, eating up all my time. The songs we’re forced to sing in school choir are just as gay and bad. These people are literally insane. Child-abuse charges wouldn’t even begin to cover all their daily and even hourly crimes.
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1992
Puberty… or was it sooner? First attempt at masturbation went remarkably well; I shot my first load damn near four feet high, almost putting my eyes out, and soon learned that I could jack off 20 times a day without any problems. My sex drive has only increased ever since, starting and remaining sky high. I’ve even done the math on how many thousands of girls I can fuck not just each year, but daily, without getting tired, and how many I can realistically expect to cum inside. What can I say? I love good pussy, and apparently I have the libido of a horny god.
I ruptured my spleen in a bicycle accident about this time, give or take a year. It remained sore for a long time, and I barely got back into school sports, but with a lot of focus, purpose, and bold moves by smart doctors, I made it.
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1993
The X-Files’ pilot episode airs, and I find myself crushing on Dana Scully. I see a picture of her on a magazine cover at Barnes & Noble, and am so nervous about buying it, having been micromanaged, abused, pre-judged, and interfered with almost constantly since I was born. Pushing through those fears, I get the magazine anyway, and sneak it home to masturbate to. There were so many pictures of that actress in it that I at this time thought was attractive, so I was very excited. I must have used that magazine for years.
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1994
I can’t seem to draw my cyborg assassin squad hotties skimpy or slutty enough, but I am more focused on this endeavor than on anything else in my whole life combined. Clearly, this is a natural free energy source worth tapping into and harnessing, honing and amplifying even. I am very fortunate that my upcoming training and military experiences did just that. Everything just starts healing, clicking, and working perfectly together in my mind, body, and environments when I focus on this one thing. It has always been my first and endless love.
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1995
A few really hot girls in my classes go on field trips with me, and I find it impossible not to gaze in horniness at them. I fantasize about fucking all of them in threesomes or even at the same time, not even knowing that ‘orgy’ is a word at this point.
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1996
I dream up secret societies and global organizations based on taking care of the environment in all the right ways, and even write a few short stories about it. Little do I know this will eventually resurface and get refined a thousand times until it is dozens of professionally polished business plans, proposals, and pitch decks –even ones reviewed by the richest and most successful leaders in multiple industries, including some who met me at one of the Ivy League universities. “Big things have small beginnings.”
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1997
Sketchbooks, notepads, agendas, and other paper-based items begin to fill up with my inventions, most of them being quite clever and brutal weapons. My racy and dark humor is bubbling forth a lot now, too, and anyone could have predicted then that I’d spearhead the Mein Komedy Magazine development just a few years ahead.
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1998
Junior high starts off well enough; I am in advanced classes, the study load keeps me nicely on my toes, and my friends go on adventures and training exercises in the woods and big drainage tunnels often. I tried hooking up with some cheerleaders but they weren’t having it. (Thankfully I ended up nailing many cheerleaders after high school, which I think is an even better time; the growing age difference is fucking hot, and that’s coming from them, too, not just me and other guys.)
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1999
I start dating my best friend’s beautiful and smart sister, and we enjoy swimming, Chess, dancing, and family movie nights. Her younger brother is an absolute cunt to me for no reason, but the rest of the family is nice and successful, so I do my best to ignore him. Hopefully he suffers nightmarish health complications and bullying against himself; he deserves at least that. There is some tension in the air during meals at the kitchen counter-top and dinner table, but things go pretty smoothly none-the-less.
My time with her inspires the first drawings which will become the basis for Inisfree’s biggest mansion; the governor’s estate. She really was such a great muse during our short time together. For the rest of my life, I’ll notice this positive effect quality pussy has on me, and make the best use of it.
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