Caribbean 1

 

Table of Contents:

  1. Introduction
  2. Highlights of the Trip
  3. A Smiling Return
  4. The Flight There
  5. The Port
  6. Welcome Aboard
  7. First Caribbean Islands Coming into View
  8. Going Ashore
  9. Returning to the Ship
  10. Next Stop:  Famous Casino-hotel
  11. Back Aboard
  12. Sailing Back to The States
  13. Airport Back

 

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Introduction:

My first expedition into the Caribbean went very well, even though I was well within the infamous Bermuda Triangle the entire time.  This trip also doubled as my intended sailing voyage preparation; I took a ship from Florida down into the heart of the Bahamas, getting used to life at sea with many other people for the course of one week.  I can now even say I have been to Atlantis.

 

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Highlights of the Trip:

I set forth with a bag of 200 condoms, a humorous stain from a recent item in my bag (those two are unrelated), had zero expenses, got all I wanted paid for in transit with zero planning, saw a Sea-Doo flip on a wave right in front of me, and enjoyed my usual exploits, such as my casual dismissal of a dozen guards’ insistence that I not proceed any further, and getting directly into the most expensive part of the biggest hotel in the whole region –without paying a dime.

 

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A Smiling Return:

The customs agents at the port back in Miami got suspicious of me because when asked who I was traveling with, I gave them the name of the ship, wondering why they would ask a man standing alone who he was traveling with.  Clearly no one.  Duh.

And when asked where my luggage was, I showed them it was –also clearly– on my back.  Seemed like really silly interrogation choices to me, but whatever.  My bad for going on trips alone to meet new people, and for not packing the kitchen sink for a 2.5-day trip across the shore and back.  I know I look like a white terrorist in my board-shorts, muscle-shirt, long hair, and flip-flops, but seriously.  Chill, dudes.  Not everybody travels in groups like a pussy.  The man in charge let me through when I straight up laughed in his face in front of the line of 3,000 people trying to get off the biggest ship.  Sorry, brother, but your paranoia radar is “wiggin” out somethin fierce.  I’m really here just to explore and bang.  I promise not to use my 200 condoms as a weapon of mass destruction.

The Uber ride back to the current base of operations was interesting, as well; the old lady driving chose the light conversational topics of abortion and leaving her husband locked up in an insane asylum.  Enjoy your negative tip, freak-show.  Have a nice night.

 

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The Flight There:

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The Port:

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Welcome Aboard:

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First Caribbean Islands Coming into View:

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Going Ashore:

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Returning to the Ship:

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Next Stop:  Famous Casino-hotel

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Back Aboard:

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Sailing Back to The States:

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Airport Back:

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